PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on Buffy Spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Like a Cheeto



Episode 5.7: Fool For Love. Original Airdate 11.14.00



"After being bested in a fight by an ordinary vampire, Buffy asks Spike to explain how he killed two Slayers many years earlier."



Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Yeah, so I don't love this ep as much as most people do.
  • 80s vamp!
  • Buffy got stabbed! Oh no!
  • Lucky Riley was there.
  • The hospital wouldn’t have to call Buffy's mom. She’s not under 18. I don’t understand why she won't go there.  I won't shenanigan it.  I'll just contrivance fairy it.
  • Buffy:“Not until you are never.” Heh.
  • How have Xander & Willow not been killed by now?  Seriously, they're awful at this.
  • It's such a philosophical season but not in a mopey way like season 6. Buffy is realizing and not for the first time that she will die. And not necessarily by a big bad but by something that could be so insignificant.
  • William the bloody...awful poet. I love it.
  • Effulgent.
  • Kali Rocha as Cecily! Soon to be….someone else.
  • Hey! Angel and Darla! And a set of what London might have looked like one time. …
  • Dru is a poet, too!
  • They use the word glory a lot…I wonder if that's on purpose.
  • Hey! A set of what China might have looked like one time.
  • I like Spike’s Boxer Rebellion hair.  It's so much better than his Billy Idol hair.
  • One slayer dead. Somewhere another Slayer is rising.
  • Dru looks so creepy in that white dress. She looks creepy all time…
  • Really? Guy punches a girl in the gut in a bar and no one’s going to intervene?
  • That is not how a NYC subway looked in the 70s…and there should be way more graffiti. Especially on the outside.

There should be way more graffiti, the ad placement is all wrong and
the most obvious thing that's missing is the metal (straps) that you hold. This is clearly a 90s/00s subway.

  • Spike: “Death is your art.” No….Death is her gift.
  • Stop crying, Spike. Wuss.
  • The Chaos demon is awesome.
I love the dripping antlers.

  • I just don’t get making Spike sympathetic after all the people he’s killed including 2 slayers.  That's why I don't like this episode.  It's the beginning of the end...


Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Parking lot! Do a shot!
  • Oh noes Buffy got impaled on her own stake!
  • Riley to the rescue! Thanks Riley!
  • Um ... the next time we see them is Riley bandaging her at home in like broad daylight? So they waited eight hours to treat her? That's ... why isn't Buffy dead from infection?
  • Poor Buffy, so embarrassed to be taken down by a regular vamp. And Riley, exercising terrific tact by not drawing attention to it, but asking her questions calmly.
  • Buffy should really stop making jabs about people being short. Dawn's gonna outgrow her soon.
  • "When do I get to patrol?" // "Not until you are never."
  • Parking lot again.
  • Is Willow's sweater pink and fluffy? I can't tell with the lighting. It might be maroon. I'll give her a pass. Because I'm feeling lazy.
  • Um, I think Willow and Xander are being pretty out of character with their terrible patrolling technique. I kind of want to call a shenanigan. In fact, I will. This is way too out of character for the sake of a joke.
  • "Blah blah oops she's dead."
  • Continuing the arc of Buffy wanting to better examine her legacy, this time trying to understand why she almost lost the fight, and why past Slayers have lost their final fights.
  • "I suppose if they're anything like me, they just found the whole subject too - " // "Unseemly? Damn. Love ya, but you Watchers are such prigs sometimes." // "Painful, I was going to say." BRB ALLERGIES. [Such an amazing exchange. -D]
  • "Slayers. You killed two of them." His hesitant "I did." Where is this going, wonders Spike.
  • Okay so here's what I like about Spike's backstory (hint: it's not his wig) - we see that he has not always been bad, as he claims, but that it's a carefully crafted persona - first the lower-class accent, the new name, then the scar, the hair, the coat - it's all an assembled character he's put on to compensate for his weaknesses as a human. I talk about this more in that essay I'm working on about Spike vs. Angel, which you'll get to see ... at some point. But this narrative appeals very strongly to my affection for identity stories, about building yourself, becoming yourself, about choosing who and what you are, right down to changing your name if you feel like it (did I mention Zelda's not my given name?)
  • "It's a perfectly perfect word as many words go, but the bother is nothing rhymes, you see." His posh accent is adorable.
  • Aw William, step away. He really should just take the hint. Cecily is super not interested. I don't actually think she's cruel to him - she's blunt because she has to be. Because he's not getting her attempts at polite deflection.
  • "I know I'm a bad poet, but I'm a good man." Is he though?
  • "I do see you. That's the problem."
  • Saying he's beneath her - maaaybe a bit cruel. But he wasn't hearing her. She had to make him stop.
  • Oh hai Angelus, Darla, and Dru's backs. Love that subtle shot (mirrored in the Angel episode Darla, where we see him crash into them from the other angle)
  • Dru's the first person who (he thinks) recognizes his soul (so to speak) (womp womp)
  • And then he dies in the most undignified way ever. "Ow. Ow OW OW OW." 
  • Oh god. DB's horrific Irish accent.
  • It's so baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
  • "What's a Slayer?" Love at first ... threat?
  • "If you're looking for fun, there's death, there's glory, and sod all else, right?" I've always really loved the cadence of this line.
  • While I like that both Slayers were shown in the flashbacks are women of color, we should also point out that they die pretty quickly.
  • Chinese Slayer's fighting style is awesome.
  • And she's dead.
  • This is probably the first time Spike's shown any kind of real dominance in his relationship with Dru. He's seemed, in past and future scenes with her, to be largely submissive, at least when she's at full power. This is further emphasized in flashbacks on Angel the show.
  • I like that Angel's ambiguously unthrilled reaction to finding out Spike killed a Slayer, is revealed to be because he's already got his soul but is fighting against it, in the Darla episode. The craft behind the crossover flashbacks of these two episodes is really impressive.
Spike hops in the air. He hops. Nothing says badass like hopping, amirite?

  • Um. Riley's got a bit of the crazy eye as he goes back to kill the den of vampires.
  • "The question isn't how'd I win, the question is why'd they lose?"
  • I love this thing Spike does with spinning the pole/cue. It just looks cool.


  • And the cutting between the subway fight and his speech to Buffy, when he - in the subway, while strangling Nikki - speaks to a Buffy he can't see. It's just cool. Macabre but cool.
  • "Every Slayer has a death wish." Okay but I don't actually think that's true. And I don't think it's true for Buffy. She doesn't go seeking death - and she never has. When she finally chooses to die, yes there's a relief but it's not so much from the fighting as it's from everything else, especially her mom - but it's mostly about Dawn - about not being willing to give that up, too. Anyway, I don't think she has a death wish. So while this episode was a really cool exploration of Spike, it didn't actually offer much insight into Buffy's character - just perhaps a foreshadowing to the end of the season.
  • And he tries to kiss her and awwwwwwwwkward. He's always associated violence with sex. She hasn't really. Faith, yes. Buffy? Sometimes she craves a nonfat yogurt afterwards.
  • "Say it's true. Say I do want to. It wouldn't be you, Spike. It would never be you. You're beneath me."
  • Ugh JM is such a good actor though, you guys. When he's covered in the crumpled bills, and starts weeping before swallowing that. I just ... and this is one of my favorite things about The Good Wife, by the way, a show you guys should all watch - I love when you can see characters thinking. When you see can see them go through several thoughts/emotions, before they decide which one to act on. Alan Cumming is amazing at this skill. So is James Marsters.
  • Dru looks so pretty in this flashback. It's cool to see how they actually broke up, that it was about Buffy even then.
  • NO NO NO NO NO JOYCE NO.
  • Buffy's trying so hard not to cry, not to show her fear, in front of Joyce.
  • And there's his crush taking over again. He's all set to kill her and he sees her crying, and not fighting him. And he's terrible at it, but he tries to comfort her. Spike's awkward attempts at growing and changing.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: Xander: What's with the hand move? Does that like mean something? // Anya: It means to follow him. That, or wait here for him.
Zelda: "The King of Cups expects a picnic ... but this is not his birthday." - Dru


Arc/Continuity Stuff:


  • Recurring: Joyce, Harmony, Drusilla, Angel(us), Darla
  • Crossoverness: This ep shares some flashbackiness with its partner episode on Angel, "Darla."
  • Spike's killing of two Slayers is further explored, as is his turning by Dru, the history of his nickname "William the Bloody," and the history of his coat and scar.
  • Look, it's the chaos demon Dru cheated on Spike with! All slime and antlers!
  • Joyce continues down her headache of nope path.

Stats:

Anya's Hair - shoulder-length, curly, honey-blonde
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 5
Dead Flashbacks - 2
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 1
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

And Starring Amy Adams as Cousin Beth

Family

Episode 5.6: Family. Original Airdate 11.7.10




When relatives arrive in Sunnydale, to celebrate her birthday, Tara uses a magic spell on her friends to keep them from learning her "secret." Meanwhile, Glory unleashes a hoard of demons to hunt down Buffy.





Happy 100th Post!  Zelda and I would like to thank all our readers for following us, reading us, and sharing in our Buffy love.  To celebrate, here are a bunch of dancing gifs.








Zelda's Thoughts:


  • "This is a very upsetting story." I use that a lot.
  • "Yes, many dolphins at the pound."
  • Willow and Tara cuteness.
  • Aw Tara still doesn't feel like she belongs in the Scoobies.
  • "You are. You're essential."
  • I'm glad Buffy's grown up enough to at least tell Giles about Dawn, even if the rest of the Scoobies and Joyce (and Dawn) aren't clued in yet.
  • "When [Hank] bailed on us, I remember Dawn cried for a week. Except she didn't. She wasn't there ..."
  • Bless Buffy. She recognizes she has to take care of Dawn. She wants to take care of her. The monks did it right. Buffy is not only obligated to protect an innocent human, she's emotionally bound to this helpless teenager and will give up (as we'll see) everything to keep her.
  • Giles: "Lots of pointing and scowling." *proceeds to point and scowl at Xander and Riley.*
  • Awkward Tara is awkward.
  • Ugh. Ben. Fuck off, Ben.
  • Ah hey sneaky scene where Ben turns into Glory but we don't know it unless we know it!
  • "I have a place in the world now. I'm part of the system. I'm a working gal!" Anya is wonderful. Also note thematic relevance to today's plot.
  • Buffy, re: Tara's birthday party. "It's not the most thrilling event of the season." Buffy, come on, she's the only character on the show whose name isn't Buffy who gets to celebrate her birthday.
  • "Your definition of narrow is impressively wide."
  • They're kind of overpainting how much the Scoobies don't really understanding Tara, but it's mostly for the point that they will stand up for her against her awful family, because she's Willow's girlfriend and she is therefore family.
  • "Tara, I just know she likes Willow, and she already has one of those."
  • "Do something to work off the tension." Transition to Buffy and Spike fighting. Except it's actually Spike's fantasy while having sex with Harmony ewwwwwww.
  • Also can we talk about Spike's fantasy is Buffy kicking the crap out of him?
  • "I'm coming right - " // "Now!" I'm impressed they got away with that line.
  • "I saw a really cute sweater at Bloomie's but I think I want me to have it." I have this problem at Christmas but with books.
  • "I think you're both profoundly stupid."
  • Ew I hate you Tara's brother. You're awful. Also why are you vaguely southern and Tara isn't? Just curious.
  • Tara looks so scared. Either that or she's out of breath.
  • Her stutter's back. Fuck you, Donny.
  • No!!! Fuck you, Tara's dad too.
  • Tara's family is awful. They haven't shown their full colors yet, I'm just preemptively hating them.
  • BUT IT'S COUSIN BETH. IT'S AMY ADAMS.

  • So I am curious why Cousin Beth is here. Like if this whole thing is about subjugating the women of the family with this lie, is Beth already of age or not yet? Also how exactly is said subjugation achieved? Like what exactly did they do to Tara's mom? I assumed it eventually ended with her dying, but like what actually did they do? Did they make her take "pills" that repressed her "demonness" or something and it eventually poisoned her to death? Did she die when she turned 20? (edit: no, because Tara was 17 when her mother died, per The Body) There's so much they don't ultimately tell us. I don't think she killed herself.
  • "A lot of young people these days are experimenting with shortness." In this cast, I'd say Riley is the only one who's not.
  • Sigh. The end of Buffy/Riley. I can see it. We all can.
  • "I suppose you wanted me to see all these ... toys. You don't even try to hide it anymore." It's a metaphorrrrrrrrrrrr for gaaaaaaaaaaay.
  • Poor Tara. Your father is the worst.
  • "It doesn't feel evil ... sir."
  • He's the worst.
  • "If I had friends and they heard about this ..."
  • Noooooooooooo Tara don't curse your friends!
  • Why are we in Willy's place if he's not here? Sadface.
  • Harmony wants to give a gift basket to demons who kill the Slayer. That's ... sweet?
  • HI AMY ADAMS.

  • SMG is all flexy flexy. I am not this flexy flexy. I guess we're not the same person after all. Even though we've both experimented with shortness.
  • GASP! Willow opens a door to a bunch of demons and can't see them! This won't end well for our Scoobies!
  • Buffy's Slayerhearing tells her danger is afoot!
  • Seriously Buffy is the best, fighting invisible demons.
  • Spike comes in for the fun, but then rolls his eyes and helps protect Buffy. His priorities are so beyond confused. I'd feel bad for him but meh.
  • BEST SCENE IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN.
  • "You want her, Mr. Maclay, you can go ahead and take her. You just gotta go through me."
  • And Tara's face as she sees them all rise to her defense. It's beautiful.

  • "Cept me."// "Cept Spike." // "I don't care what happens."
  • "We are her blood kin. Who the hell are you?" // "We're family." I'm not crying you are.
  • God how abusive was Tara's family? She's shaking when Donny steps closer to her
  • And then Spike figures it out.
  • And it matters here that Tara is not a demon, because demons are mostly evil in Sunnydale (less so in Los Angeles)
  • DAWN GOT TARA A BROOM. And she looks so proud of her gift.
  • Their outfits are so clashy I can't handle it. It's lucky they're being supercute right now.



Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Tara-centered episode. Weird, since she’s recurring. Anya had a couple, sort of, while she was a guest star but never as a contract player until season 7.
  • Miss Kitty!
  • “Yes, many dolphins at the pound.” Hehehe.
  • It’s interesting that they can show Tara and Willow in bed but can’t show them kiss yet.
  • I’m so PROUD of Buffy for telling Giles right away about Dawn. And it is the same night because Buffy is in the same shirt as last episode.
  • Established: Dad will never be an option.
  • Hey, it's five time Oscar nominee, Amy Adams!!
  • Anya’s entrance. Omg. She’s amazing. “Just a few days after we moved you in!” 
  • Aww, Tara is so awkward.
  • “That’s funny…if you’re a complete dork.”//”Then how come Xander didn’t laugh?” OMG, I want to see a Xander/Riley roadtrip.
  • Ben has some amazing abs. And that’s all he’s good for.
  • Ok, so I know Ben is Glory and the audience doesn’t know yet but I'm wondering if the writers or the director knew. The writer might have known because they’re in the same room together. But ten seconds after we see Ben, we see Glory. And the writer might know that but what bothers me is that Glory appears ten seconds later in a long black dress. Did she really get dressed that fast, run around the lockers. She can run fast…I just…It was such a quick scene, it may have made more sense if she had Ben’s scrubs on. But then he did take his shirt off. And she even had time to put on a necklace!  I'm not shenaniganing it, but I think it could have been done better.
  • Anya, “Please come again for more purchases!” Heh.
  • Anya is so excited about her job! She’s so sweet and funny.
  • Cordelia mention!
  • This is…it’s kinda mean girlish. The way Xander and Buffy are talking about Tara. I mean, I guess they’re trying – but they need to get to know their friend’s girlfriend. And what does Buffy know about Anya, for that matter? Get to know your friend’s mates, Buffy!
  • Ugh,this obsession with Buffy, Spike. It’s just…gross.
  • Tara’s brother is awful.
  • Cousin Beth! Amy Adams!
  • Story Idea: Anya’s great(x20) grandson comes to Sunnydale.  She's gotta have a relative somewhere. Maybe a granddad that got turned into a vampire?  
  • NO! Don’t contact Graham, Riley! He will bring his boringness.
  • Riley looks like he has the start of a mullet going…. 
  • Our dorm doors locked automatically.
  • Usually things happen to you [magically] when you turn 18 or 21, since they're numbers we know in America and other parts of the world as 'coming of age' ages...even though there's really not much of a justification for them beside the fact that This Is the Law.  20 seems like such a better round number.  Two even decades.
  • “It doesn't feel evil.”// “Evil never does.” It’s such a religious conversation metaphor.
  • That demon looks like a clown.
  • “A vampire slayer? How unbelievably common.” Really? I mean there’s only one at a time. Usually. It feels like a cliché God or superior being trope line from sci-fi films like, “You’re all like insects to me” which I always thought was a stupid line/mentality.  I mean...we don't talk to insects.
  • This bit where everyone gets the spell is very well directed; everyone's heads moving back at the same time.
  • And we see the beginning of Riley’s destruction. Self-destruction? The writer’s destruction of Riley?
  • “I don’t go out with Vampires. They’re never interested in my intellect.”  See? He's funny!
  • It’s so well done. This fight scene with the demons they can’t see. It’s so well directed.
  • That demon got American History X’d! [I hate you for reminding me of that scene. - Z]
  • “The women in our family have demon in them.” It just…it makes no sense and I’m glad the scoobies see through it so quickly.
  • “You just gotta go through me.” Fuck yeah, Buffy. Not…tearing…up.
  • “We’re Family!” Buffy gets a point for saying the title of the episode.
  • “Excuse me, what kind? What kind of demon is she?” Heh. Anya.  She's always helping.  She helps Buffy move in, she solves yet another dilemma. I should keep stats.
  • Aww, Spike did something kinda selfless. This part, though. This part seems soooo believable in this world – telling the women that they’re demons to keep them in line…such a great metaphor for the women in ultra-religious families in our own world being told they’re dirty.
  • I love this dance with Tara and Willow and the floating...
  • ...although they both look like they’re wearing different kinds of wallpaper from the 70s. 

It's like grandma's bathroom.




Crossfire!
Tara: A half camel.
Daniel: That's a stupid line
Zelda: I didn't used to get it
Daniel: it's like the front half a costume.
Zelda: No, it's like an ice skating thing, isn't it?
Daniel: Is it?
Google: It's a yoga pose.
Daniel & Zelda: We get it, but it's still not funny.


Dawn: Only losers drink alcohol.
Everyone: *awkwardly puts down solo cups*
Daniel: Are they even 21?
Zelda: No! Well, maybe Riley and Giles. But Tara just turned 20, so ...
Daniel & Zelda: Shenanigans!


Favorite Lines: 
Zelda: 

It's all about the proud smile they share.

Daniel: “But it’s still not funny.” – Anya, following Tara's explanation of her 'joke'.


Arc/Continuity Stuff:


  • Recurring: Miss Kitty (last appearance), Tara, Glory (not yet named), Ben, Harmony, Willy's Place (sans Willy)
  • Mention of Buffy's father - he's in Spain with his secretary, "living the cliche." Shithead.
  • Buffy compares Glory to Cordelia.
  • Riley mentions Graham.
  • The "reveal" about Tara fearing she's part demon explains when she sabotaged that spell in Goodbye, Iowa (and which Willow mentions here).
  • Sandy, the vampire who hits on Riley in Willy's Place, was last seen as a human in Doppelgangland, where (presumably) Vamp!Willow turned her (even though we didn't see her suck anyone else's blood).
  • Harmony shopped at April Fools, where Cordelia used to work.
  • Spike's chip is what helps them figure out the lie in the Maclay family.


Stats:
Anya's Hair - shoulder length, curly, honey blonde
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 3
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 1 Tara's not a demon after all!
Shithead Reveal - The Maclay family is awful
Shenanigans Called - 1
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Magic Incense and Spooky Sand



Episode 5.5: No Place Like Home. Original Airdate 10.24.00

"Buffy learns more about Dawn after she discovers a mysterious orb linked to a group of monks being pursued by an incredibly powerful force."





Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Monks!  With their monk haircuts! 
  • Buffy rarely gets the subtitle timestamp. (2 months ago.)
  • Buffy's fighting a wrestler! 
  • “It was my turn to bring the bundt cake.” heh. 
  • The Dagon Sphere reminds me of the Orb of Thesula…but looks so cool.   
  • Pumpkin belly?  Where'd that come from? 
  • Aww, Buffy is so jealous of her little sis. 
  • Giles in the wizard outfit.  It’s just so.  He’s so gleeful.  And Buffy's face.  And Giles falling face.  And it’s all just so wonderful. 
  • Both Zelda and I mimicked Buffy’s ‘hand over fist’.  We are nerds. 
  • It appears to be paranormal in origin//how can you tell?
  • Hey, it’s Kendoll. Will he ever be interesting? At least he has more expressions than Graham. 
  • I like that Buffy thinks what’s happening to her mom is supernatural.  Because it’s easier.  She can fight monsters.  She can’t fight an illness. 
  • Glory!   
  • Wow, it’s been like 20 minutes and no Xander and Anya.  No Tara, either. 
  • Here’s Anya! 
  • I love Buffy’s shirt. I so want that shirt. But you know, for men.
  • Glory does 'crazy' well.  I love her mannerisms. 
  • The Magic Box is so crowded!  Yay for Giles! 
  • Anya, “Please, go.” Heh! 
  • “Hey you!  Have a nice day!”  Love her. So much.
  • Willow is terrible at wrapping. 
  • Anya is helpful in so many ways.  She can come up with a spell to help Buffy and wrap a statue all at once.  So underappreciated, that one. 
  • Aww, Buffy’s trying to make Riley feel helpful. 
  • “Maybe instead of trying to take care of me, let’s agree to take care of each other. Deal?”  You go, Riley. 
  • “What are you doing?”//” My boyfriend.”  Great dialogue in this ep. 
  • This meditation sequence is so trippy, I love it. The visual effects are simple but so affected and well directed. 
  • The reveal with the picture is so good.
  • it must take such incredible magic to insert a human being into a life and change everyone’s memories, pictures, etc.  
  • It’s convenient that they had that extra room in the house…for storage. 
  • This tricky stuff making Dawn look evil is so effective and everything that happens can still be so easily explained. 
  • Hey, look.  It’s Spike, post erotic dream. 
  • I love the five words or less. “Out for a walk.  ….  Bitch.” 
  • “I never really liked you anyway, and you have stupid hair.”  This is…just stop. 
  • “Where’s Buffy?” “You don’t have to worry about her.”  Eh, that’s the only one that’s not too explainable.  It’s a weird response to the question. Maybe it's the delivery.
  • Whoa!  Glory is strong. 
  • Anya has a job!  She’s so cute accepting the job, too, "OK....boss."
  • She is huuuumaaaaaan.  No joke, whenever I hear that word, I hear this monk saying it. 
  • Sarah and Michelle have excellent chemistry as sisters.


Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Oh right. The monks. They're a thing.
  • This vamp is huge. But our Buffy is the best.
  • Even if her coat is weird.
  • Joyce :( this is not okay
  • YAY BEST SILENT EXCHANGE EVER.
  • Giles is just. So fucking cute. I cannot with the cuteness of him.
  • Buffy trying to visualize the phrase "hand over fist" is adorable. I love when they let Buffy be adorable.
  • I love that Willow comes in asking Giles about his hat and cloak. Did he tell her about his costume? Or did she just assume? Either scenario is adorable. I picture Giles excitedly phoning Willow to tell her, and she demands pictures and he can't figure out the timer on his camera so it's blurry pictures of like his hand.
  • Dawn, you're awful. Stop it.
  • "Why can't I ever be li'l punkinbelly?" // "Well, I don't feel qualified to address the last part..."
  • "You just have no idea how much I wish I were an only child these days." And the audience groans at yet another trolling line. At least we get answers this ep.
  • DAMMIT JOYCE STOP HAVING A BRAIN TUMOR.
  • WHY THE FUCK DOESN'T INTERN BEN KNOW HOW TO PRONOUNCE THE WORD MUSCLES WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. He says muskles. With a k. What even why. Why didn't anyone catch that.
  • I forgot that brain-sucked security guard is what sets Buffy to convincing herself that Joyce's illness is magical in origin. Poor Buffy. Poor Joyce. Also poor brain-sucked security guard, I guess.
  • Ugh Glory. I wish I wish she were better at delivering her lines because I really can't stand her "acting."
  • Aw Giles got a customer! He's so excited and cute. "They gave me money and then they left!"
  • Anya, what is your dress.
  • "I could crap a better existence than this." See, even reading the line you can hear how it's supposed to sound. And that's not how she says it. She says the line completely wrong. Bad bad bad acting. Hate Glory.
  • It is an interesting feature of Glory as a villain, though, her tendency to go mad unless she's brain-sucked someone recently. Also the yet-to-be-revealed thing about having to share a body with Ben.
  • "That's not candy." Um. Who goes into a store and starts eating things without paying for them? Fuck you, Sunnydale patrons.
  • "Please go." Anya is awesome. "Hey you! Have a nice day."
  • This episode is all about Anya being awesome! She's the one to think of the sorcerer and spell Buffy can cast to see if something is attacking Joyce. And then later she rescues Giles by being awesome at retail.
  • I dunno, I wouldn't pour sand on a carpeted floor. Why can't Buffy use the only bathroom in the house?
  • Spooky Trance Time!
  • I actually really love the way this is handled - the disappearing Dawn in the photos, etc. It shows that she's not real, which is enough to set Buffy off, without actually marking her as malicious or benign.
  • "Nothing. There's nothing." Poor Buffy. She wants so desperately for there to be a magical explanation for Joyce's headaches, because that's what she's trained to fight. She can't fight real illness. (And if Intern Ben and his linguistic skills are all we having fighting on the side of medicine, we are fucked).
  • Dawn's bedroom fading into a storage room - such a cool effect.
  • "You're not my sister."
  • Aaaaaaaaaah they're playing up Dawn as creepy evil so well. Because if you know the truth it's just a hurt pouty teenager, but if you don't know yet, it all sounds evil. "Do you really think I care you're the Slayer? ... Mom's coming back."
  • I TOTALLY FORGOT THIS MOMENT WAS HERE.

  • Oh right, because last episode Spike discovered he might have a crush on Buffy. And he's handling it like a teenager, insulting Buffy.
  • "Your house happens to be directly between ... parts and other ... parts of this town."
  • She called him William. That's ... kind of weird? She's never done that before?
  • "And I never really liked you anyway and you have stupid hair."
Buffy's inner monologue: dafuq what that?
  • I forgot how much happens in this episode.
  • Look! Dawn has tea! Potentially Evil Tea!
  • "I'll see your numbness and I'll raise you a lower back pain."
  • "Anya, would you like a job?" // "..Okay." ANYA IS SO CUTE. I LOVE IT SO MUCH."Okay ... boss."
  • See, so like, this could be awesome, two tiny blondes fighting and being really strong. But Glory sucks.
  • Yay Buffy punch the Glory!
  • Buffy's hair looks amazing considering how many floors, walls, and columns she's been thrown against.
  • "I didn't ask for this. I don't even know - what is she?" // "Human. And helpless. Please, she's an innocent in this. She needs you." // "She's not my sister." // "She doesn't know that." It hurts, you guys.
  • Oh god, I even want to hug Dawn now. Buffy gets home, Dawn gets up from Joyce's side, muttering "I wasn't bothering her."
  • "Buffy, what's wrong with mom?" // "I don't know."


Crossfire!

Ben: [mispronounces muscle]
Zelda: [looks triumphant at Daniel]
Daniel: It's not a mispronunciation. I've heard people say that. It's like a jokey thing.
Zelda: No, it's not!
Daniel: Yes it is! I've heard people do that.
Zelda: I've never heard anyone do that! You're lying.
Daniel: I'm not lying! I swear. No one would actually mispronounce muscles unless it's on purpose. It's not a medical term, it's a word! It's an everyday word!
Zelda: [glares]


Favorite Lines:

Daniel: "What are you doing?" // "My boyfriend." - Dawn/Buffy
Zelda: "Out. For. A. Walk. Bitch." - Spike



Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • First appearance: Dagon Sphere, as-yet-unnamed Glory (aka The Beast, The Abomination)
  • Recurring: Joyce, Joyce's headaches, Ben
  • First mention of the Key. "It's energy, it's ... portal. It opens a door." Also it's Dawn.
  • Riley's still benched after his itty bitty heart surgery.


Stats:

Anya's Hair - shoulder-length, curly, honey-blonde
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 1
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 1
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Buffy Breaks a Padlocked Gate - 1
Buffy Breaks a Wall With Her Body - 2
Glory Breaks a Building With Her Foot - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 1 (Dawn)
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

A Sodding Breadbox

Episode 5.4: Out of My Mind. Original Airdate 10.17.00




"While Riley's Health begins to deteriorate, Spike and Harmony force a surgeon to remove the behavior modification chip embedded in Spike's brain."



Zelda's Thoughts:
  • Parking lot! Do a shot. I'd have alcohol poisoning if I actually did shots every time they use the parking lot as a set.
  • I feel like a long tied neck scarf wouldn't be the best for slaying? too easy to get strangled?
  • "Buffy, what are you doing here?" // "My job?!?"
  • And then Spike joins the fray because of reasons.
  • Tasting your own nose blood is pretty gross, Spike.
  • What's that? Spike's delivering an ominous threatening speech? Time to undercut it by having him fall into an open grave!
 *dusts hands*

  • Oh hey reminder that college is a thing. I love me some French Revolution debate.
  • This is actually making me really retrospectively sad, that Buffy is applying herself so hard at her studies, both academic and Slayic, knowing that it won't last long because Buffy is not allowed to have good things.
  • It's nice that Xander is good at something, all carpentery and such.
  • "What do you see?" // "Willow hand."
  • Aw they built Buffy a training room and it's huuuuuuuuuuuge. Let's celebrate by having Riley be a hyperactive puppy.
  • Dawn pouring all the cereal out to get to the prize - another sign the writers intended the character to be younger than they cast. By the time I was 14 I knew how to get prizes out without sacrificing delicious sugary cereal.
  • NO NO NO NO NO JOYCE COLLAPSED.
  • I like that Dawn's stethoscope playing is what leads to the realization that Riley is sick.
  • Dawn's a great catalyst this ep - she gives Buffy the idea of tipping off The Initiative to Riley's illness by speaking into Riley's tapped phone.
  • Did Riley just spike the basketball? I don't think that's how you sport.
  • Shenanigans! Graham said The Initiative has been at Riley "for weeks" about his illness. Bull freaking shit.
  • "Harmony, is it a sodding breadbox?"
  • Buffy, you ripped up that perfectly nice money! Bad Buffy, bad!
  • Ugh. Riley. Don't let this kill you because you want to be strong enough to arm wrestle your Slayer girlfriend. It's not quite the same but it's reminding me of Angel deciding he couldn't afford to stay human with Buffy.
  • "Loving you is the scariest thing I've ever done, Buffy." // "I don't know why." I really love that exchange. I've been trying to articulate what it is I love about it and I'm having trouble. It's what Buffy says, and the way she says it. That it shouldn't be scary, that it should be easy, natural, that it's not a competition but a partnership and there needs to be trust.
  • So um. They don't shave Spike's hair before cutting into his skull? They also didn't even bother to cut a hole in the blue sheet and you can see him moving against the sheet. One big shenanigan on this surgery.


  • Wow. Is he just like. Putting a bandaid on Spike's hair?
Yes, he is
  • Also the gauze is nowhere near where he was operating.
  • Parking lottttttttttttttttt.
  • Meanwhile Riley's heart surgery also has the tiniest bandage known to man. 


  • Listen, I know about laproscopic surgery but this was done in 2000, and I'm pretty sure that's not what was happening here.
  • Also they didn't bandage or even clean Riley's bloody knuckles. This is the worst doctor ever.
  • Oh right this is when Spike's crush starts officially with the kissing dream. "Oh God, no. Please, no."


Daniel's Thoughts:


  • I always feel like that one crypt they have is blow-up. Like there’s someone with an air pump blowing it up before each scene.
  • I was going to say how cool it is that Buffy staked a vamp before he even made it out of the ground, but…there’s no way she could have. It looks like she staked his head. SHENANIGANS.
  • Ugh, shut up Spike. “I will know your blood, slayer…I will make your neck my chalice and…” Seriously, shut up. Your poetry sucks!
  • Willow’s so cute that she’s proud that she and Buffy are having an intellectual debate.
  • All this witty banter. Back and forth and back and forth! I want to write it all down!
  • How does the Magic Shop have so much space? It’s huge.
  • Oh, Harmony. She’s so sweet for a vampire.
  • Yes, I know it’s a recurring theme: Smoking=Evil. And vampires are evil so they smoke…but how can they if they don’t even breathe? I’m not going to shenanigan it. I mean it’s kind of a series long shenanigan.
  • Oh man, Joyce, “Who are you?” Again, with the good foreshadowing. Also, it's laying out the rules of Dawn.
  • Ugh, Ben. He looks like Ken-Doll. Meaning his hair looks plastic.
His hair seriously looks fake

  • Very subtle click on the phone, initiative guys. Nope…no one is listening.
  • Oh, fantastic. It’s Graham. The most boring character to ever boring.
  • It’s like he’s being forced to be on this show.
  • And why is everyone in southern California wearing a damn sweater?
  • Jesus, would it kill you to have an expression, Graham?
  • I love how Anya thinks Xander’s metaphor is about them. She’s so adorable. Xander never knows what he’s got.
  • Wow, Buffy has a loud knock.
  • “How about knocking?” She…did? Didn’t you hear it? It was really loud.
  • Riley’s so scared to lose Buffy that he’s willing to risk his life. What an idiot. A romantic, lovely, sweet idiot.
  • “Peroxide-head” heh.
  • Sorry Spike, still got yer chip.
  • Did Riley just have heart surgery without anesthesia? Shenanigans?
  • And after all this, Buffy can’t at least walk him home?
  • This dream is so stupid and narcissistic and so Spike and I so wish it wasn't prophetic.


Crossfire!
Buffy: "If that's what I wanted, I'd be dating Spike."
Zelda: smiles a Cheshire cat smile at Daniel
Daniel: glares at Zelda

Favorite Lines:
Zelda: "In my montage, I have glasses." - Buffy
Daniel: "Oh! Who put the monkey heads near the Styx water? Do we *want* to pick exploded monkey out of our hair?" - Anya


Arc/Continuity Stuff:
  • Recurring: Tara, Harmony, Graham, dilapidated Sunnydale High, Adam's caves
  • First appearance: Ben the Intern
  • Spike watches Dawson's Creek


Stats:
Anya's Hair - dirty blonde, curly
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 3
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 4
Apocalypse Called - 0