PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on Buffy Spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Five What by Five What?

Episode 4.15: This Year's Girl. Original Airdate 2.22.00

"Faith awakens from her coma and seeks revenge against Buffy."

Daniel's Thoughts:
  • Hey! Faith!  I’m glad they didn’t just forget abOAT her.  See what I did there?
  • Little sis coming!  Foreshadowing!
  • And I’m glad they brought the knife back because that’s the coolest knife ever.
  • What the hell? What is Xander wear-  What are they both wearing?? 
  • What’s with the hat, Willow?  Blossom called, she wants…  Oh God.  The wardrobe choices.
  • No Anya this ep :(
  • “He’s the terminator without the bashful charm.” Yeah, that pretty much sums up Adam.  With the Mayor, Spike and the Master, did they run out of charm to give the villains?
  • Does no one care or notice that Xander just got electrocuted? Heh.  But also, aww.
  • He has not one hair on that chest of his.  Riley has time to wax?  He can’t naturally be that way. 
  • The Mayor!  Hey! It’s a wee snake! Symbolism! 
  • This dream thing is so cool – Faith’s subconscious making her the victim and making Buffy this big bully type monster.
  • Hey! Sound guy in the shot! How embarrassing!  
  • So where is Anya really? I mean since no one knows where she lives....  Yep, still harping on that.
  • Guns aren’t your friend, Buffy.  Might want to watch that.
  • Ooh, Buffy telling Willow to use magic  - careful, again, Buffy.
  • Also, where’s Giles?
  • This nightmare sequence is so cool.  So I’m guessing Faith has a pretty similar nightmare over and over – as evidenced by her line, “It usually starts to rain aBOAT now.” – But this time, she defeated Buffy and woke up from her coma. 
  • It’s not every person who can wake up from being in a coma for a year and start walking around – but then again, this is a slayer so no shenanigans there.
  • It’s a good thing Faith’s victim was the same exact size as her.
  • Riley wonders if they’re being watched…I wonder if that camera is still in his room.  There hasn’t been evidence of there being one in Buffy’s room – which is where they are now.
  • It’s such a metaphor for being in the Army – don’t ask questions, follow orders – I assume that was the writers' point.
  • Sneaky sneaky Faith.
  • She’s like that latch-key kid on Christmas eve looking in on the happy family enjoying dinner and opening presents.
  • Who called Buffy to tell her about Faith?  The council?  They don’t exactly seem to care about Buffy’s existence or protection.  The police?  Do they know enough about Faith to call Buffy? Especially at Giles’?  Did Joyce forward the call?  I’m not..convinced.
  • "Who's Faith?" Haha.  Oh, Riley.
  • Seriously, who designed Willow’s wardrobe?
This ... skirt ... what?
And what is going on in her shirt?? Who are these people and what
are they doing?
  • It’s nice that they walked and ended the conversation exactly where Faith was standing.
  • Looks like Faith found her own clothes.
  • There were like 10 aBOATS in that sentence.  It’s like the writers purposefully put them in to her dialogue.
  • It’s cool that Willow has told Tara about Faith – but it's still unclear how much has she told her about her life?
  • Tara, fighting - Amazing:
  • Does Xander still think he and Faith have a connection because they had sex that one time which meant absolutely nothing to Faith?
  • Sorry, Spike – the writers just can’t remember that you’re still evil.
  • Daniel: Hey look, another sweater vest.  Zelda: What is this, the Chandler Bing show?
  • So this video was supposedly taken a year ago, but Harry Groener’s hair is a lot shorter. 
  • “The fact that you called Faith a gal, proves you don’t know her.”  The fact that Riley uses the world gal is so totally cute.
  • Hey! It’s Joyce!  We haven’t seen her in a while.
  • I kinda love that Joyce has a lipstick called “harlot”.
  • I like the fact that they didn’t just skate over the fact that Buffy hasn’t visited home in a while.  It’s a shame. I mean, it’s the same town…supposedly.
  • But it’s also nice to see the old home set again.
  • I don’t understand inside trees.  What? There’s one in the bedroom.
  • It’s so rude to smoke inside someone’s house without their permission, council!
  • That body switcher thing is kinda cool.
  • “Are you sure you’re OK?” “Five by Five.”  OH NO!  

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • dreeeeeeeeeeeamtime! I really love the tone of this - the sweet peacefulness of Buffy and Faith working together, never as in real life.
  • ugh that knife. Faith still feels gutted by Buffy's betrayal.
  • At least Faith's not a blonde such that we'd have to suspend disbelief about her hair not changing color during her months-long coma.
  • Awwwwww I fucking love Harry Groener.
  • Picnic with her daddy. So sweet and sad.
  • I love that Buffy is this terrifying avenging monster in Faith's dreams, and Faith is sweet and vulnerable, no evil intentions. Faith is who she thinks she might have been, were it not for the Slayerness. Were it not for Buffy. Had she had Buffy's advantages. She blames her, on every level, for the life Faith could never have. It's really quite well sketched out, an earned mentality through Faith's entire arc on the series. It's sad, and it's perfect, and I can't wait.
  • Aw Riley's back. I'm mostly happy because Buffy's happy.
  • "Did they put a chip in your brain?" Xander's more right than he realizes.
  • Parking lot! Do a shot!
  • Buffy chased Faith into her grave. The metaphor ain't subtle but it's pretty good dream stuff. And faith claws her way out of death, leaving Buffy behind.
  • Faith found the only hospital gown that completely closes in the back.
  • Aw Faith. Now I'm sad the evil Mayor died too.
  • "It's just the scarf part of me really."
  • meh. I'm glad Riley is breaking free from military think, but he's still boriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing
  • How did Faith know where Giles lives?
  • Faith's face as she watches through the window. Emotionless, but seeing everything. Not sure how to process what's she's seeing, or what she ought to feel about it.
  • "That was the funnest coma ever."
  • I like that Buffy, unlike Willow and Xander, who are cracking jokes and making their dislike of Faith very clear, is willing to give Faith a shot - she doesn't know what Faith's thinking now, how she's feeling. She's always seen Faith's potential to be better, because she understands more than they ever can, the burdens Faith carries.
  • the chemistry, the tension sizzling between these two, it's so damn good
  • "No such animal." Love that line so much.
  • eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Slayerfight!
  • Parking lot (again)! Do a shot!
  • Poor Tara's boobs. This dress is horrible for them.
  • haha Spike acting like he's invested in helping them, just so he can find out how much trouble they're in. 
  • Faith's boots were IN THE COP'S FLASHLIGHT BEAM. Sunnydale cops really are deeply stupid
  • Aw man. The Mayor, he's in pain. "You're ... sleeping." It's interesting that, once he lost Faith (or faith?), he knew on some level Buffy would defeat him. He made this video because he knew she would probably outlive him. Especially interesting because you don't see any of that in the S3 finale. Maybe it's retcon, but I don't care. He's so fucking good, and I love their love for each other, even if they're evil.
  • Joyce! We forgot all about her.
  • Now I'm missing my mom. Maybe I should go home, in case Faith is bothering her, too.
  • yesssssssssssssssss I'm so excited.
  • Good subtle acting from Eliza, as Buffy-in-Faith, seeing Buffy's face and realizing what's happened, before Faith-in-Buffy knocks her out.
  • yessssssssssssssssssss


(Riley is shirtless)
Z: Enjoy it.
D: I'm takin' it all in. There is not one hair on his chest.
Z: His nipples are so pointy.
D: He's cold!

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: Tara "Five-by-Five?  Five what by five what?" Willow: "That's the thing! No one knows!"
Zelda: "Tell you what I'll do then. I'll head out, find this girl, tell her exactly where all of you are and then watch as she kills you. Can't anyone in your damned little Scooby club at least try to remember that I hate you all?" - Spike

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Recurring: Faith, Mayor Wilkins (!!), Forrest, Graham, Tara, Joyce
  • Faith's first dream has a shoutout to Dawn - "little sis coming"
  • Buffy refers to the Council, as set up for their appearance later to retrieve Faith


Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 2
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 1 (with Faith's help)
Buffy Breaks a Window - 1
Faith Breaks a Wall - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Yummy Sushi Pajamas

Episode 4.14: Goodbye Iowa. Original Airdate 2.15.00

"Tension erupts between Buffy and an ailing Riley as they pursue Professor Maggie Walsh's killer."

Zelda's Thoughts:
  • "It's raining monsters." // "Hallelujah."
  • mmmmm this episode, tone-wise, is already more satisfying than last episode. The sense of doom and fear of all the Scoobies, not knowing why they're suddenly in danger, but feeling it very keenly. Things are very wrong, and we've finally met our official Big Bad. Fucking Adam.
  • "What, it was good enough for me, but you're above it all?" // "Precisely."
  • Ooops. Riley finally recognized Spike.
  • "But he's not bad anymore." // "Hey!"
  • Yay Spike giving the thumbs up! One of my favorite gifs.

  • Ugh this episode is gooooood. Such good fighting they have. Such well-made arguments.
  • Except then there's Fucking Adam and it's less good.
  • "What am I?" // "You're a monster." Though I do like his small moment of disappointment. "I thought so."
  • It's the oboe of Sad Riley.
  • It's actually really cute, Buffy and Anya and Willow all snuggled up in bed.
  • "Scenes from my parents' marriage." Way to pull the divorce card, Summers.
  • Aw Xander brought the girls breakfast in bed. Also news of a dead boy. Typically Sunnydale breakfast talk.
  • This fight between Riley and Forrest, though, is far less compelling than the group fight earlier. Mostly because weaker acting.
  • Come now, Forrest. Buffy doesn't stake humans. He really doesn't know what a Slayer is, either.
  • Angelman keeps talking about orders from Washington. Do we think DC knew about the Fucking Adam Project, or that they were turning a blind eye, or maybe Walsh and Angelman were just plotting alone?
  • Parking lot graveyard! Do a shot!
  • Also, swarming on the graveyards with military hummers? Super not covert.
  • I'm actually very impressed Spike found a crypt with working electricity.
  • Aw man, first Spike loses his groceries, then the rest of his cash, then Forrest breaks his TV. What's an evil demon to do?
  • "Maggie's dead. Happy now?" Fuck you, Riley.
  • "And then you can stop asking me how happy all this death makes me." Yeah! Fuck you, Riley.
  • Aw Willy! We've missed you.
  • Hi Riley. You're looking all feverish and confused.
  • God, Riley, you're such a racist.
  • Hey now. Do not be manhandling our Slayer!
  • "Hey, we got new rules here. No killing."
  •  I've always wondered if that random woman Riley pulled a gun on was human or demon. If human, why was she in the place in the middle of the afternoon, anyway?
  • heh Riley is too tall to lie stretched out on the bed. He must go fetal because he is 8 feet tall.
  • I really love that they planted this early on - Tara's fear that she's secretly a demon - and don't even pay off on it til next season. Respect.
  • Buffy's wearing disguise glasses. Maybe she'll clean them!
  • "I totally get it now. Can I have sex with Riley too?" an appropriate callback to all the double entendre happening last episode.
  • Why are they talking so loudly if they want Riley to sleep? Blankets are not actually soundproof walling material.
  • MB, not with the great acting.
  • In case we didn't hate Maggie enough before, she's also been drugging all our soldier boys. Fucking Maggie Walsh.
  • Wait, getting their meds through their food? Shenanigans! Those boys ate in the dining hall, and they weren't drugging the entire campus. This just seems like a stupid mistake in writing, since we already saw Riley taking his vitametavegamin pills.
  • Stockade? Really?
  • "I feel an attack of dumb blonde coming on." I loves ya, Buffy.
  • Riley *said* "brilliant woman," but I *heard* "burmy woman." I made Daniel rewind the dvd. 
  • It occurs to me rewind is now an obsolete term. There's nothing being wound, one way or another. What should we say instead? Reverse thrusters!
  • omg the floppy disc drive in Fucking Adam's chest. ... which can apparently hold multiple discs in the same drive, as he never removes his before putting in Riley's disc. Shall we shenanigan that?
  • "Oh, Mother created you too." Ugh they're both bad. "Maggie is not my mother. I have a mother." It's bad dialogue, but it's also bad delivery.
  • "I cannot be programmed. I'm a man." it's so baaaaaaaaaaaad [A salesman - CowboyRiley]
  • Aw the demons all hate Spike now. Poor Spike. He has no friends, no family, no hope. Take that away and what's left?
  • "There's gotta be a flaw." // "I think the part where he's pure evil and kills randomly was an oversight."
  • Buffy: "He's alone. He has nothing to hold on to." //Daniel: (whispers) "Goodbye Iowa" (30 sec later, delighted) "Yay, Riley with his shirt off."

Daniel's Thoughts:
  • And we start right where we left off from last week.
  • Spike has a cousin?  That’s still alive?  A vamp cousin?  I mean isn’t that something that should be more than a throw-away line?
  • Oh, is that why they call it the secret service, Xander? Also, shut up, Xander.
  • Please note that Anya’s only line in that scene was helpful and not at all snarky.  That is all.  Actually…it seems like they just wanted her to say something pre-credits.  I’ll take it.
  • Giles’ digs at Spike are amazing.”Oh, it’s good enough for me, but you’re above it?”//”Precisely”
  • “He’s not bad anymore.”  Really?  I mean, just because he can’t physically attack someone, doesn’t mean he’s not still evil. [My point exactly. - Spike]
  • Yes, Spike – go out into the sunlight with only your jacket to cover you.  The contrivance fairy will figure out a way to get you home safe.
  • I mean it really sucks for Riley.  Learning that the organization you’ve been working for/with for years – an organization that you think has been doing good – is really evil.  RILEY IS SYDNEY BRISTOW.
Basically the same person
  • And now the Frankenstein comparisons start – beginning with dead kid.  Except, Adam is seemingly intelligent.
  • Why didn’t they go to Anya’s apartment/house/wherever-the-hell-she-lives?
  • “You really should get yourself a boring boyfriend, like Xander.  But you cant have Xander.” Heh.
  • The cartoon channel turned into a the channel that interrupts your broadcast because a little kid was skewered?  Awkward!
  • I’m glad the gang is at least all together…even if it is in Xander’s basement.
  • I love Riley’s balls poster.  It makes me laugh every time. [Me too. We're 12. - Z]
  • Shut up, Forrest.  "Maybe Buffy needed killing?"  What a dick.
  • Really Forrest? Only one person can stake someone?  Buffy is the only one in the world who can use a piece of wood as a weapon? Seriously, shut up Forrest.
  • So is Riley in charge now?  Does Maggie have a second? What’s the chain of command here?
  • Quick! Soldier boys! Attack the parking lot!
  • You interrupted Spike watching Passions!
  • Oh hey! A location shot!  An actual non-set side-of-the-road shot!
  • “Maggie’s dead.  Happy now?”  Really Riley? This is the first time we’ve seen him be a total dick. I don’t like it.  I mean I know he’s all confused and shattered and sad and all that stuff – but come on.
  • So why is Willow allowed to leave the basement? Is it suddenly safe now?
  • Does that whistle that happens when Willy pronounces an S an actor thing or does he do that on purpose? Inquiring minds.
  • Ah, I see. He’s acting like a dick because he’s not taking his meds…
  • That old lady demon(?) looks like Frances McDormand
  • Aww, Riley!
  • Again with Xander’s soldier knowledge helping…it was one night.
  • There are so many demons in Sunnydale, what makes Willow think this will narrow it down?  Does she know which color belongs to which breed?
  • So Tara blows this spell on purpose.  It appears here that she does it so that she can spend more time with Willow…but I love how this seemingly harmless act comes full circle a year from now in the season 5 episode, “Family”.
  • Did Buffy think that putting her hair in a ponytail and wearing glasses would be enough a disguise?
  • Oh Xander – finding any excuse to try to make out with Buffy. YOU HAVE A HOT ANYA AT HOME, XANDER.
  • Way to completely explain exactly what Buffy was looking for right in front of Buffy, Dr. Angle.
  • Really?  Professor Walsh made him with a floppy disc drive?  When’s he up for an upgrade?  Apple needs to get on this right away.
  • Wait! He didn’t eject the other disc before putting this one in!  System reboot! System reboot! 
  • Does Adam remind anyone else of that demon in the internet from season 1?
  • Forrest has such smooth skin.  Yeah, that’s all I’m writing about this bit.
  • That demon looks like a gremlin! It’s a gremlin man!  And he’s wearing leather pants.  Were leather pants really that much of a thing in California in the late 90s/early 2000s? Everyone seems to be wearing them.
  • It’s also long skirt season.  This was such a style at the time.

D: (Starting the episode) "Goodbye Iowa. Aw, Riley."
Z: "Whatever."

Willow: I really like just talking and hanging out with you and stuff.
D & Z look at each other, roll eyes.
D: Have they...stuffed yet?

  • We can't transcribe it, but we just had a big fight about whether Riley is good in this episode or not.

Favorite Lines:

Zelda: "Maggie tried to kill me." // "It didn't work, but they're all upset anyway." - Buffy/Anya
Daniel: "You really should get yourself a boring boyfriend like Xander.  You can't have Xander." -Anya

Arc/Continuity Stuff:
  • Recurring: Anya, Adam, Forrest, Graham, Angelman, Tara, Willy the Snitch
  • We call yet again on Xander's dubious military memories. Even though it's not like he was in the 'Nam.
  • Tara sabotages the demon-finding spell. FOR REASONS WE WON'T FIND OUT TIL NEXT SEASON.


Anya's Hair - short, honey-colored
Dead Humans - 3
Dead Undeads - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Forrest Breaks a TV - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 2
Apocalypse Called - 0

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Irony's Kind of Ironic That Way

Episode 4.13: The I in Team. Original Airdate 2.8.00

"Buffy joins the Initiative, but her self-reliant and curious attitude doesn't mesh well with the military's chain of command."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Anya is so cute :)  She plays cards like a ten year old.  Side story…I used to win against my grandma all the time because I could read the cards in her glasses.  It was all very innocent – I had no idea I was cheating.
  • Anya: "Yes we’ve enjoyed spanking."  HEE
  • This is my favorite – where Buffy proves just how amazing she really is, taking out like 30 initiative guys
  • And she’s so modest about it, too.
  • At this point Riley is so proud of her – let’s hope that lasts and he doesn’t suddenly feel threatened. 
  • Willow needs to get over this anti-Anya thing, STAT.  It's part of what makes me really start to dislike her in the later seasons.
  • Oh hey! It’s Giles and Spike!  Neither have anything to do, so let’s put them together.
  • Where is Giles getting this money to pay Spike?  He doesn’t have a job.  Is the Watcher’s council giving him severance?
  • They’re called Scoobies, Spike, not Slayerettes. 
  • Buffy and Riley would produce beautiful babies
  • Oh Maggie Walsh – I feel like she gets more praise than she deserves.  She’s kind of bland, I think.
  • I forgot how funny this episode is – it’s got a lot of cute zingers.
  • A pager? Really?  I mean…I guess doctors still use them – but wouldn’t a cell be better?  I mean the 90s are over.
  • Tara’s so sweet.  She’s flirting so dorkily.  And Willow…she’s just not there yet.
  • Is this the first time we see Anya really getting excited about money? I think it is.  I mean how has she been living thus far?  We still have no idea where she lives – how she lives and eats and buys things and all that lovely stuff.
  • Anya’s so uncomfortable.  Don’t worry, An, you’re an ex-demon.  They go for current demons.
  • Hey! All the beeping!  That must get annoying when the boys go to the movies.
  • Hehe, Buffy is so damn cute.
  • “Don’t worry. I’ve patrolled in this halter many times.”  Yep – and leather pants.  If Buffy can fight demons in leather pants, she can fight them in anything.
  • Of course Tara is extremely happy to have you come over, Willow – even if you kind of blew her off earlier.
  • Heh  - Spike was grocery shopping.  What could he have to buy?
  • Fighting leads to Sex.  Yeah – it’s like Faith said that one time, “Isn’t it crazy how slaying makes you hungry and horny?”  
  • So this is the first time Buffy’s going to have sex without someone losing his soul or just becoming a total asshole.  Good for her.
  • Gross, Walsh – watching Buffy & Riley have sex.  Tsk.
  • Ha! Stupid Spike.  I love that Giles gets the upper hand here.  And his cash back.
  • Oh Riley – ignorance is bliss.
  • Oh Riley, don’t put that shirt back on.
  • It’s amazing how many times Xander’s soldier knowledge from Halloween has come back to help the Scoobies.  I wonder how much knowledge Buffy still has of 18th century girly stuff and if that ever helped history class?
  • Walsh should really know better than that – I mean she knows how tough Buffy is.  Did she really think a couple of demons would stop her?
  • I don’t know if I love this “two completely separate stories” thing.  I mean I suppose they both have to do with the initiative.  It worked so well in Anne.  But that’s because Buffy wasn’t even in the same town.  I hate that she hasn’t even had a scene with Giles at all.  I think that’s one of the downfalls of the season – that the gang really had a lot of their own things going on. [But isn't that the point of the season? That they drift apart? - Z]
  • Love when Buffy gets in vengeance mode.
  • Goodbye, Maggie Walsh.  It’s a shame that Buffy couldn’t do it.  But she can’t kill humans…
  • I just don’t get why Adam did.  

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Willow cheats at poker. She should teach her tricks to Spike.
  • Xander teaching Anya that chips = money = good. Anya's love of capitalism begins!
  • "I think Riley's okay in an oafish kind of way." I think that is the most positively Xander has ever spoken of a Buffy love interest.
  • Professor Walsh and your shady shady glares. You're gonna die soon and you won't be missed. However, the intended arc you embodied will be. Fucking Adam.
  • Willow still doesn't like Anya, even though she seemed to be getting along with her fine during the poker game. Sigh.
  • D'awww Spike has a home. With so much natural light WHAT IS WRONG WITH SUNNYDALE VAMPIRES AND THEIR LACK OF SELF-PRESERVATION.
  • So if Spike gets to charge for helping Giles out of the evilness of his heart, and Cordy and Angel are trying to charge for saving lives in LA, how come Buffy STILL doesn't get a stipend from The Council? Freaking shenanigans. All my favorite fanfics involve Buffy finally getting paid for what she does.
  • It's interesting that Giles is trying to feel Spike out for whether he wants to join the good fight, especially considering how little he trusts him with anything in later seasons.
  • Buffy looks especially pretty this episode. Weird skirt, but great hair/makeup.
  • Ohhhhh the double entendres of the Initiative/Riley's penis.
  • God Riley is so much taller than Buffy. Every time they go for a kiss, I wince for both of their necks.
  • I think I can pretty firmly point to here as when my disappointment with the season began. I'm just so underwhelmed by everything going on right now.
  • "But I'm certain in time you'll pick that up. Don't pick that up." It's stupid but I still love that line.
  • Man, Walsh needs to really stop talking to Buffy like she's a foolish child. You'd think she'd have gained some more respect by this point, after the run down Buffy gave her of her experience, and Buffy's demonstration the night before. It's just stupid.
  • Ugh Tara's stutter. My least favorite recurring character is Tara's stutter.
  • Also Tara's unflattering wardrobe. Amber Benson is a beautiful woman and I feel like they're trying to hide that for arbitrary reasons.
  • Willow, your sweater is grey! You are kind to me! ... Your skirt is still pink. Never mind.
  • Fucking Adam. Fucking horrible Adam. I hate you.
  • "Living the Life of Riley." I see what you did there.
  • "This is Graham, that's Forrest, and Extra and Other Extra in the back."
  • Aw Willow. "I could have invited somebody else if I knew it was an open free-for-all."
  • I really really wish I liked AB better because the Willow/Tara relationship is very sweet and yay.
  • Willow's asking some good questions about The Initiative's endgame. Listen to the voice of bad sweaters, Buffy.
  • "It's imperative, when ensnaring it, not to damage its arms." BECAUSE WE HAVE EVIL PLANS. PLANS OF EVILNESS.
  • Ugh.
  • See, but this scene is a good example of where I thought the season was going. The military cut and dry presentation, and Buffy asking questions, not following protocol of briefing structure, trying to figure out motivation, and her general casual interactions.
  • Tara has a single? Swank. Can I be Tara's girlfriend too? I bet her room is even bigger than Willow's and Buffy's double, because why not.
  • Seriously, they shoulda had a boot camp for the actors playing Initiative soldiers. They're all just strolling or standing around, and it doesn't feel military at all.
  • Aw Spike lost his groceries. Stupid soldiers. Wait, what are my priorities again?
  • Aaaaaaaaand now it's time for the weirdest sequence ever. Slow mo fighting intercut with Buffy Riley sexytimes. What's their ship name? Biley? Ruffy? I hate both of those.
  • And to add ew on top of ew, Maggie Walsh is watching the entire fucking thing on spy cameras. You are a gross person, Maggie Walsh.
  • Giles's face when he eats the bar. "Please leave my home now." And then he looks for a place to spit it out.
  • "And no cheek from you." Giles zips his lips shut. Giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiles I love you.
  • Giles and Spike, buddy cop show. They have such good chemistry.
  • "What's 314?" *phone immediately rings* coincidence and leprechauns, Buffy.
  • Oh hey. Spike shirtless. Spike's shoulders. Also what's that scar on his shoulder, right above the giant blue vein? Do we think that belongs to Spike or to JM?
I'm not fixating you're fixating.

  • Oho. Willow spent the night with Taraaaaaaaaaaa.
  • Willow and Buffy aren't talking. Sad feels.
  • I do believe that Maggie Walsh isn't yay-killing-people about this, I do believe she's sad Buffy must die. She's clearly weighed the various threats she perceives, and thinks it's for the greater good of her Terrible Fucking Adam Plan, that Buffy be taken out of the picture. But like. Seriously, fuck her, if she thinks it's better to kill a human - and not just a human, but one of the best warriors for good the world has - than to have her stupid project discovered. Fuck you, Maggie Walsh.
  • It's a trick! Buffy ain't dead. It takes at least two inches of water to kill Buffy.
  • urrrrrrr MB is not good at the whole "Buffy is dead" scene
  • Buffy BAMFing it up with her message to Maggie Walsh. "If you think that's enough to kill me, you really don't know what a Slayer is. Trust me when I say you're gonna find out."
  • You've lost him, Maggie. And you ain't getting him back. Mostly because you'll be dead soon.
  • I actually wonder if she could have won him back, talked him back to her side. He's still very much military mindset. I wonder.
  • BUT WE'LL NEVER KNOW. Fucking Adam.
  • Seriously, Fucking Adam.

Favorite Lines:


Trust me when I say you're gonna find out.

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Recurring: Walsh, Graham, Forrest, Tara, Anya
  • First appearance: Spike's Crypt. Dr. Angelman, Adam, Anya's Capitalism.
  • Buffy and Riley sleep together for the first time.
  • Xander's vague memories of being a soldier tell us that Spike's got a tracer in his shoulder.
  • Adam kills Professor Walsh.


Anya's Hair - honey-colored, curly and short
Xander's Job - hocking boost bars
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 2
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 1 (Maggie Walsh)
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 1
Apocalypse Called - 0

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

You Were Myth-taken

Episode 4.12: A New Man. Original Airdate 1.25.00

"Ethan Rayne returns to town and transforms Giles into a demon. Spike is the only one who can help."

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Anyaaaaaaaaa. "Please continue your story" and that proud smile at Xander.
  • "I've seen the library. It's gone downhill since you left." Good parent banter, Riley. "So you're retired?" Less good parent banter, Riley.
  • I don't quite buy Buffy worshipping Professor Walsh or calling her the smartest person she's ever met, much less to Giles's face. It feels like a forced out-of-character moment, in order to facilitate Giles's emotional plot for the episode, in the same dishonest vein of The Zeppo. There are other aspects that weren't forced, that had been adequately planted, like not telling him about dating Riley or about Riley and the Initiative in general.
  • "And you're what, shocked and disappointed? I'm evil."
  • Heh the dick-measuring. Walsh describes Buffy as poking demons with a sharp stick, and then she completely wipes the floor with her stats over Riley's. Don't try to belittle my Buffy, Professor Walsh.
  • "How many hostiles would you say you've slain?" Per our stats, 156 onscreen. BAM (well, not all of them were hers, but shhhhhh)
  • I really really really like that Buffy didn't downplay her achievements, that she was honest about all her awesome heroical activities.
  • "I suddenly find myself needing to know the plural of apocalypse." It's apocali. True story. NO ONE CAN TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME.
  • And see Walsh throwing massive shade on Giles and his parental skills, that I believe too. She's been passive aggressive like this from her first episode, as well as passing judgement without adequate knowledge. Of course she would treat Giles like this.
  • "Of course. How wrong of me to choose my own words."
  • WOW seriously Walsh you decided she lacked an adequate male role model? How ... 50s of you? Like seriously why would she say male? Buffy's a female. It makes NO sense if you take it at face value. It make sense only if you realize her actual intention is to insult Giles.
  • Aw poor Giles. This is upsetting. See Buffy? You shoulda told him.
  • His real accent is even breaking through a bit, he's so upset. "Spike? Spike knew?"
  • See, this stuff isn't forced. But some of Buffy's insensitive anvil-dialogue was.
  • So wait. Was Ethan hiding in the shadows of the crypt for that entire conversation? The lengths chaos worshippers will go to, to achieve evil monologue time!
  • 314 is harming demons? PI IS HARMING DEMONS YO. No one can take my math puns from me.
  • "I'm twice the man she is."
  • "An unemployed librarian with a tendency to get knocked in the head."
  • So ... Ethan turning Giles into a demon was just for kicks, right? Like .. .basically if you worship chaos, that's the only motivation you need for any hijinks. 
  • Giles is a demon!
  • It must have been fun for Tony Head to break all the things. Usually all the things break him.
  • So I think actually the first clue (that's not just tonal) that magic=gay is that Willow doesn't immediately tell Buffy about Tara. She claims she was by herself when the rose spell went wonky. It shows that there's something she's uncomfortable talking about, especially as the rest of their conversation is about Buffy's relationship with Riley. And she hasn't been reticent about friends in the past, nor about relationships. She's not saying anything because she knows, whether she'll admit it or not, that there's something different going on here and she doesn't want to talk about it until she's figured it out.
  • Poor Giles. Your English does not resemble our Earth English at the moment.
  • Wait so ... let's say Giles found Xander around noon. They don't make it to Giles's apartment until 6 pm? Did they stop for afternoon tea and scones? PRIORITIES, PEOPLE.
  • Spike is so amused that Giles is a demon.
  • "He must undo this and then he needs a good being-killed."
  • "And I'm just supposed to help you out of the evilness of my heart?"
  • "Money? Oh, I like money!" And thus was spawned Spike the Capitalist. Inspired, of course, by Anya's practical questions from before. Anya, the true capitalist.
  • Aw see, Buffy? You didn't communicate with Giles, and now he's afraid to communicate with you about his Fyarlness because he wants to not appear useless.
  • "We have stuff ... pictures." // "We have nothing." Anya wins.
  • Fyarl Giles terrorizing Maggie Walsh will never not be wonderful.

  • "Two of them. English like me. But older, less attractive."
  • Riley has a skeleton key that opens every door on Main Street. You mean ... Only Street?
  • I love Buffy. Riley keeps trying to tell her she can't come along on a military operation and she's having none of it. Nope. This is her territory, this is her field, and this is her father figure. If anyone stands in her way, she will smash them like she smashed that door.
  • See, Giles, if you had said yes to Spike's plan of telling Buffy, she wouldn't be almost killing you right now.
  • And Spike smashes Giles's car in the midst of taunting the commandos. Spike, you're so inept at so many things. Delightful blustery Spike.
  • "It's the stay and gloat that gets me every time."
  • Oh god that shirt.

  • haaaaaaaaah and Riley finally has a use. He arrested Ethan. I guess that's why we never see him again.
  • "You're really strong. Like Spiderman-strong. And you're in charge. You're like, make the plan, execute the plan. No one giving you orders. I like it." This is the part of Riley I really like. I like that what he admires and loves in Buffy is her strength and independence, her leadership. When he's later feeling his inferiority in S5, it's because he's lost more of his power since he lost the juice given to him by Professor Walsh. It's the same thing driving Angel giving up being human in I Will Remember You. They both want to feel like they matter in the fight. But neither of them want to weaken Buffy in order to make themselves feel stronger. This is important and it's not mentioned enough. Riley is a doof in many many ways, but this part of him I like.
  • TAH-WIST 314 is Professor Walsh's secret lab of secrets!

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Buffy and Riley making out!  I so want Marc Blucas to make an appearance on The Crazy Ones.
  • It’s Buffy’s birthday! Nothing bad can happen…!
  • Robin Sachs!  Ethan’s last episode. :(
  • Do we really want to surprise Buffy?  I mean - haven't we learned that this is a thing that shouldn't be a thing?
  • Anya!
  • Anya is learning how to be human and enjoying it.
  • "You’re retired? Or…working somewhere else now?"  Nice save, Riley Finn.
  • Why can Spike just leave now?
  • And when did Buffy decide to tell Professor Walsh about her Slayer-ness?
  • "You were myth-taken."  Ha!
  • Uh oh. Giles has apocalypse-coming face.
  • The plural of apocalypse.  I say apocali.
  • Oh wow.  The passive-aggressiveness between Walsh and Giles is awful.  It's just so uncomfortable and obvious that Walsh has absolutely no idea the extend of what Buffy's been doing the past three and a half years.
  • Aww, Poor Giles.  This episode really sums up his life this season.  He needs a job…
  • One of the best reveals ever of Ethan… “Oh Bugger, I thought you’d gone.”
  • Buffy/Riley sparring.  Kinda hot.  Not sorry.
  • I love drunk Giles!  His real accent comes out a bit when he’s drunk.
I'd like to see this show.

  • Oh hey Tara! So that's where Willow's been running off to.
  • Why you being so secretive about your activities last night Willow? Huh, Willow? [Just let it be - Scott Hope]
  • “I sorta kicked him across the room last night.” “That’s not good.” Aly has such good delivery.
  • This episode has a lot of comedy but it's also pretty sad.  I so want Giles to find his place soon.
  • Spike has no belongings. But he has a tape measure?
  • Anthony Head is trying so hard to talk with all the prosthesis and it’s mostly working.
  • Giles scaring the hell out of Walsh is so awesome.
  • “Why would a demon steal a car?”//”Why would a demon steal that car?”  HA! They’re really finding Anya’s voice.
  • That’s a pretty huge hotel room.  Almost as big as the really huge dorm room.  Set builders like size...
  • Those message boards from Hush would really have come in handy right about now.
  • Nice shirt, Ripper.
  • “Excuse me, if you don’t mind. I’m…[going to find an excuse to leave you two alone so that you can talk.]” 


D: lol, I thought I made up that joke.
Z: No.
D: And I didn't think it was a joke.
Z: I totally made up that joke. I've just been saying it for years.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: "You were Myth-taken"  - Buffy.  Her delivery is so she knows how dorky her pun is but she doesn't care.
Zelda: "Uh oh. You have but-face. [Giles looks appalled] You look like you're gonna say 'but.'" - Buffy, my hero

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Recurring: Ethan Rayne (final appearance), Walsh, Tara, Anya.
  • And Giles is the last to know about Riley and the Initiative
  • Ethan tells Giles that something's harming demons. Something called 314. This ends up being the number on the door of a secret lab in the Initiative.
  • Spike had a couple of Fyarl demons working for him once. Sure.

Anya's Hair - short, honey colored
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 1
Giles Breaks a Door - 2
Buffy Breaks a Door - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

For the Safety of Puppies and Christmas

Episode 4.11: Doomed. Original Airdate 1.18.00

"As Riley comes to terms with Buffy's revelation, a trio of demons attempts to reopen the Hellmouth."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • And we start where we left off with Hush.
  • They have no idea what to say to her.
  • I love how Buffy gets offended by, “What are you?”  Accurate.
  • Riley: “You see me with my clothes off, I look like a…”  Daniel: Go onnnnnn.
  • I think Buffy’s being a little unfair.  I mean Riley wasn't the only one that lied.
  • Amy the rat knows before it happens! Earthquake!
  • And in Sunnydale, Earthquake means – something big and bad.
  • I guess that demon in the lab doesn't have the chip. 
  • Seriously, why is Spike the only one with the chip?
  • Percy!  And his girlfriend is a total bitca.
  • This is why I don’t go to parties alone, Willow.
  • Percy’s gross. But he has a killer jaw line.  What?
  • Hey Graham.  Gonna emote today?  Nope?  Carry on then.
  • I don’t really get what’s changed for Buffy with the whole Riley situation.  Why is it worse that he’s better prepared for her world?  He was in her life either way. Would it be better if he was some victim that always needed saving?  Or someone she could keep a secret to her whole life?
  • Meters and kilograms, Riley?  Where are we, Canada?
  • Where’s Anya? This episode is kinda dull.  I need Anya to make it better.
  • Why can’t they kill Spike again?
  • “Some good looking guy who done you wrong.” Ha.  You don’t know the half of it.
  • I guess the teens of Sunnydale are being bused somewhere else? [When my high school was demolished because of an exploding Mayor snow collapsing the roof, I think they bussed the kids to the next town over to do halfsies in their high school. Buffy and I are the same! - Z]
  • Spike can kill demons!  He’s useful!  Yay…
  • Shenanigans!  Why is Xander saving Spike?  Just…get out of there.
  • See Buffy? You and Riley make a good team!
  • Ha! Marsters, an American playing a Brit faking an American accent.
  • Riley’s frat house walls are the same color as the dorm rooms.
  • For the safety of puppies and Christmas. Heh.
  • So yeah, this episode is pretty blah - especially after Hush. I didn't write much - I even had to ask Z, "What's...this episode about again?"

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • blah. I think the only thing I'm looking forward to this episode is Spike's speech about puppies and Christmas at the end.
  • hah I love that she immediately bristles at Riley's awkward approach to the conversation.
  • But she handles it better. he asks what she is - because how could a tiny female be so skilled and strong? she must be a what, not a who - but she asks who he is - because he's a person who's been actively lying to her, and she doesn't know how deep those lies run. And like obviously she's been lying too, but she just got over a Parker Poophead and she's not interested in another man who lies to her.
  • I like how unnerved he is by how much she already knows about his organization.
  • "I don't see a scratch on you." // "You're not looking hard enough." // "I'm looking pretty hard."
  • Okay, this scene is pretty well written. Why am I dreading this episode so much? Maybe it's just the tone implied even in the title. Buffy's much more pessimistic about her fate and life than usual, and I also don't like how an apocalypse is played for laughs (like in The Zeppo) when - as Buffy points out - the last time there was an earthquake she died. One should take an apocalypse seriously.
  • Hah Spike trying to hit Xander with a wrench and Xander not even noticing. Good opening salvo about how he inspires no more fear in the hearts of the Scoobies.
Look at her, smirking at my pain. Pink Sweater #12.

  • So why doesn't Buffy tell Giles about Riley? I know she told him she wouldn't tell anyone but like. Tell Giles. I feel like we've had this lesson many times at this point. Always tell Giles. Because listen to how plummy and British he sounds right now. Actually bizarrely plummy. Both Daniel and I think his voice sounds just bizarre. Did he have to ADR that entire scene or something?
  • (yeah yeah yeah, she doesn't tell Giles because that way it can be one more thing upsetting him in A New Man, but that's stupid.)
  • Oh yeah the other meaning for the title, that Willow is somehow doomed to always be the nerd she was in high school. Whatever. 
  • Aw Spike. This is a terrible idea. Was that seriously the only shirt of Xander's you could find?
  • You know what, the sound is all over the place this episode. I think they must have had to ADR like 60% of it, for whatever reason. And then of course Spike's speech at the end about puppies and Christmas is entirely out of sync (you can tell for sure because the sound of him clapping his hands doesn't match the gesture). I kept hoping they'd fix it for the DVD, but alas.
  • Sign of true friendship - the thing Buffy is most upset about in Willow's story was the same thing Willow was upset about - Percy calling her a nerd.
  • "She's cool, she's hot, she's tepid, she's all-temperature Buffy."
  • HST = Hostile Sub-Terrestrial. meh. I'm renaming it to Hamburger Surprise Tokens.
  • "It's the end of the world." // "AGAIN??" See it's a cute gag, for the one line, but they're still playing it for laughs.
  • "My contrition completely dwarfs the impending apocalypse."
  • Man, demon, stealing bones is just so tacky.
  • Seriously, though, this episode is SUCH a place holder. The two things it accomplishes are: pushing forward the Riley-and-Buffy story, and the reveal that Spike can hurt demons. Either one of those could have been folded into a story I actually care about. But I think mostly it's the meaningless apocalypse that bothers me.
  • "Do you know what a Hellmouth is? Do you have a fancy term for it?" 
  • I do like the juxtaposition of the Scoobies doing research in books, rhymes and legends, while Riley briefs the other commandos on the demon's stats - size and speed. See, if this were what S4 were about, I would have loved this season so much. I was so excited by this contrast, this conflict of the rugged individuals with brilliance and experience versus the large lumbering organization with a very black and white perspective, tied down by procedure and bureaucracy (the thing Buffy abandoned when she quit the Council). But they threw it in the trash when they traded that for actually being about building demon-human-cyber hybrids. And then Adam being the boringest villain ever. So much that could have been, so much that wasn't.
  • Seriously Spike that's a really crappy way to try to kill yourself. It's like you're not even trying.
  • "I mean, am I even remotely scary anymore? Tell me the truth."
The little squeaky grrr he makes though.

  • "Think of the happy - if we don't find what we're looking for, we face an apocalypse." // "Really? You're not just saying that?"
  • "No, I mean you're stupid." Riley Finn, TA for Seduction 101.
  • Aw, shout out to Faith in a coma! I actually did make an "awww" sound even though ... that's not an aww moment. But I like that Faith is still on Buffy's mind, especially since she'll be coming back in a bit.
  • Historical Museum of Sunnydale? huhyeahokay.
  • That little smile of Spike's after he belittles Willow and Xander.
  • "Oh, as usual, dear." Aw Giles.
  • Buffy, re: Spike "Why is he even here?" snerk
  • "If these walls were still walls, what stories they could tell."
  • It's time to defy science and the speed of falling, as Buffy miraculously catches up with the Vahrall demon after it jumped in the Hellmouth. On behalf of science, I call a shenanigan.
  • Haha oh Riley you're terrible at lying. Like truly bad. Like petroleum bad.
  • "Me? No. No sir. I'm just an old pal of Xander's here." Spike's fake American accent is my other favorite thing.
  • "You have a security code and rank?" Marc Blucas's quick glance up, trapped and his small "No." is when I'm reminded that he can do funny sometimes.
  • Yay Spike got his black tshirt back! But his jeans are regular blue. Strange and confusing times.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: "Oh, as usual, dear." - Giles
Zelda: "What's this? Sitting around watching the telly while there's evil still afoot. That's not very industrious of you. I say we go out there and kick a little demon ass! What, can't go without your Buffy, is that it? Too chicken? Let's find her! She is the Chosen One after all. Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let's annihilate them. For justice, and for ... the safety of puppies ... and Christmas, right? Let's fight that evil! Let's kill something! OH COME ON!" - Spike

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Riley's in the credits now!
  • Recurring: Amy the Rat, Forrest, Percy, Graham
  • Buffy and Riley now know each other's secret identities.
  • Most of the Initiative thinks the Slayer is a myth.
  • Shoutout to Coma!Faith.
  • Spike can hurt demons. He's back and he's a bloody animal!


Xander's Job - Pizza Delivery
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 3
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses -0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 2
Apocalypse Called - 1

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

It's a Babble-Fest

Never. Sleep. Again.
Episode 4.10: Hush. Original Airdate 12.14.99

"A group of murderous creatures straight out of a fairytale steal the voices of Sunnydale."

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • omg you guys omg it's time for Hush.
  • I'm kind of afraid my commentary here will just be me going "IT'S SO GOOD. IT'S SO CREEPY. CAMDEN TOY, YOU GUYS."
  • aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
  • seriously i'm so excited
  • "Talking about communication. talking about language. Not the same thing."
  • Even though it's a dream, this is the first time I believe Maggie Walsh as an interesting leader and a teacher.
  • Buffy's dreams are awesome. They state our theme, they're kinda sexy, and then SCARY DEMON PROPHETIC DREAM.
  • So their first onscreen kiss is just a dream. But they'll have their first real kiss this ep, too, so it's okay.
  • I love the nursery rhyme. It's such a good comprehensively-constructed villain, you know? The Gentlemen. It's not actually a real fairy tale, but it seems like it could be.
  • Willow's wearing a pink sweater because she enjoys my pain.
Pink Sweater #11

  • Willow ships Buffy/Riley. That much is clear.
  • Petroleum.
  • I love that Giles with a chainsaw is in the credits. So very much.
  • So I guess Spike is allowed to wander around unchained now? How come? He tried to escape last episode and was tied up again at the end of it. 
  • "Thank you for knocking." Giles, this has happened like 12 times. Lock your damn door.
  • "Oh, we're not your friends. Go on."
  • "Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?" // "Yes, that's exactly the most appalling thing you could have said."
  • bicker bicker bicker
  • aaaaaaaaand pretentious wicca-ness. So my question - this isn't Willow's first time going to a wicca group, right? She mentioned going to one when Oz was still here. Did she just decide to wait a bit to bring up doing actual magic instead of bake sales? Also was Tara not at the first few meetings?
  • Such a weak putdown, but somehow amazing in its stupidness: "Oh yeah, then we can all get on our broomsticks and fly around on our broomsticks"
  • Tara, girl, your hair. What even is it.
  • "Bunch of wanna-blessed-bes"
  • I feel like Buffy's and Willow's dorm room gets bigger every time we're here. Did they always have a sink? I definitely just saw a sink.
  • Oh hey. Riley in a tank with glistening sweat, I can get behind this plan.
  • "Yet we must Clark Kent our way through the dating scene, never to use our unfair advantage. Thank god we're pretty." Forrest is not a great actor, but he gets some good lines. [And yet, still a billion times better than Graham -D]
  • meh, no one in the Initiative is a great actor.
  • Spike-as-Anya. One of the best things ever. "Xander, don't you care about me? We never talk.
  • I love the clocktower set. I love the tiny voice-stealing box. I love every fucking thing about the design of this episode. ALSO THE GENTLEMEN BEST MAKEUP AND BEST PHYSICAL PERFORMANCE EVER.
  • Seriously even the hands are perfect.  ---->
  • So why is Buffy brushing her teeth in the bathroom sink if there's a sink in her dorm room I KNOW THERE IS I SAW IT. That's it, I'm officially calling a shenanigan.
  • The quietly unnerving music under Buffy and Willow realizing their voices are gone is amazing. The entire soundtrack to this episode is amazing.
  • I warned you my notes this time would just be me gushing.
  • Also I adore that they got away with Spike flipping someone off on tv because he did it British style.
  • Oh hey momentarily shirtless Riley. You can stay. No, take your shirt back off.
  • Shenanigans! Forrest writes the note "It's all over town." How would he know that? They're going down the secret elevator, which is located in their fraternity house.
  • Shenanigans! While the "In case of emergencies use stairway" is a great sightgag ... does that mean there's a staircase down to the Initiative that DOESN'T have the same kind of voice ID thing that the elevator does? Cuz ... isn't that kind of ... not secure?
  • Okay back to enjoying the show.
  • Anya's face when Xander jumps up immediately when Buffy and Willow enter Giles's (unlocked) apartment.

  • Olivia drinks all the booze.
  • You know, the Scoobies are pretty good at finding ways to communicate with each other sans talking. Because they are awesome and I love them.
  • Aw look at all the chaos on the one block of outdoor set they have. Oh show. Oh budget.
  • I always wince when Buffy breaks that dude's wrist. It's just all crunchy.
  • See? When they stop talking they start communicating. Or snogging. Or. y'know, both.
  • Oh god the shot of their feet just floating out that doorway goddamn these guys are creepy. Seriously. Best one-off villain ever. I've been thinking about the Angels on Doctor Who lately. They're so amazingly scary in Blink, but I grow more frustrated every time they return. I realize it's much more a Doctor Who thing, to have recurring villainy things like that than it is a Buffy thing, and I'm kind of grateful. Buffy has recurring vamps, sure, but most of the other types of demons either don't recur at all or DO recur, but as specific characters, specific personalities (Anya, D'Hoffryn, Turok-Han). I get that they're different shows. I'm just saying. Buffy is the best.
  • Poor random guy getting killed. What an awful way to go.
  • Olivia's a great artist. Giles should have had her draw his overhead drawings.
  • Giles's lecture. Best sequence ever or best sequence ever?

  • And we don't even see one of the bloody slides since he changes it offscreen. Giles, you psycho.
  • And a handjob joke. Seriously, how the hell did Joss get away with the stuff in this episode?
  • I love how mad Buffy is about Giles's portrait of her.

  • Like seriously. He didn't need to draw her. That could have just been text. But he thought the presentation would go better if he drew on each card. So he drew Buffy. But like seriously wow he's a bad artist.
  • I will say, Tara's starting off well. She's not passive - she's trying to solve the problem, looking up books of spells, looking up how to reach out to Willow, whom she now knows also does real spells.
  • See, now that Willow's stronger, she can't be our damsel in danger anymore. So we have Tara.
  • I wonder what the significance is of the handmen of the Gentlemen - the scabby bandaged fellows in strait jackets. I wonder if they have a separate name.
  • Ouch, we hurt Willow's ankle there when we fell on her.
  • aaaaaaand oops Buffy and Riley know about each other now whaaaaat
  • Such a good act break. Damn this episode is awesome.
  • I guess the Kiss the Librarian mug is Spike's for always now - he was drinking out of it last episode too. Also I'm guessing Giles will never want to use it again ever.
  • And then Anya makes a sex gesture with her fingers SERIOUSLY HOW DID NONE OF THE CENSORS CATCH ANY OF THIS.
  • Amber Benson is so much more attractive than they ever let Tara be.
  • Oh hey lurv feels.
  • So I haven't really been snarking on Tara yet, even though I've mentioned before that I'm not a huge fan. She's fine in this episode and I still love the idea of her. I just don't love the performance.
  • I wonder what would have happened if the Gentlemen had succeeded in getting seven hearts. World domination? A world without shrimp? Everyone starts singing their feelings?
  • Mmm I take back my no-snarking-on-Tara comment. Her stuttering is badly done. And I just don't think she's an interesting actress.
  • Tara: "No, you are." Daniel, his voice catching "Oh my god." he's really cute, you guys.
  • Aw Giles. I'm sorry. He can tell Olivia probably won't be coming back.
  • "I guess we have to talk."//  "I guess we do." silence
  • BAM! Mr. Whedon, that episode was awesome.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • OMG.  I’m so excited for this episode!
  • Andy Hallett, of Angel is an extra in this scene!
He's two behind Buffy

  • Buffy, I’ve had this exact dream.  In the front of a classroom…with Riley…  I won’t elaborate more.
  • Creepy girl and nursery rhymes = episode potential.
  • OMG.  The gentlemen! SCARY.
  • Well Willow seems better than last episode.  She’s teasing Buffy and now following her to make sure that her friend is happy. It’s so cute. ;)
  • Petroleum.  That’s a great cover, Buffy.
  • At least grading papers is a better excuse, Buff.  And he didn’t even question your whole crude oil excuse.
  • Amber Benson!  First episode!
  • Why is Spike not tied up?
  • “All you care about is lots of orgasms.”  ANYA!
  • These Wicca women are hilarious.  Especially the lead girl – she’s so good at being a douche.
  • Mmm, Riley.  Mmm, Sweaty Riley.
  • Forrest: “Thank god we’re pretty.”  Heh.
  • And thus starts the Xander/Spike slash.

Note: I did not make this and I do not ship it.

  • Olivia! The orgasm friend!
  • Man, the gentlemen are so freaking scary.  And it’s the actors that really seal it.  The way they move, etc.
  • And the silence begins…
  • Why is that girl so upset that she can’t talk?  I mean, it’s just the beginning…for all she knows, she has a bug or something.
  • This is such a great acting exercise for the actors.
  • Such a good scene with the telephone – they’re so used to doing these things that they don’t think before they pick it up.  Texting would be good right now.
  • I love how they’re disgusted by the guy selling message boards and…then proceed to buy them.
  • I don’t understand why everyone’s so upset about this…I’d love if everyone just stopped talking.  Amirite?
  • And all the creative ways to communicate – it’s kind of amazing.
  • First kiss between Riley & Buffy because they stopped talking!
  • I wonder how much Olivia knows about Giles and Sunnydale.  We never really get to explore her. It's "The Freshman," where she doesn't see anything, this, and then it's only Dream Olivia in "Restless".
  • Man, they are so freaking scary.
  • Giles is so proud of his presentation.
  • I love that Anya brought popcorn.
  • This: 

You can't take your eyes off it, can you?

  • The buffy pic that Giles draws is awesome.  Buffy getting offended is even awesomer.
  • Giles drew her with a  crossbow and now she’s carrying one to patrol.  That’s so cute!  Power of suggestion!  Not that it’ll do her any good.
  • Tara and Willow will make a good couple because they share the same awful fashion sense.  At least they can share clothes.
  • Those dorm doors should have peepholes.
  • I like the idea of the gentlemen having those weird helpers.  It’s something Buffy can fight.
  • Love the moment of recognition between Buffy and Riley.  So good.
  • Is this the one with the misunderstanding, Jack, Janet & Chrissy?
  • Though – it’s really cute that Xander would fight Spike for Anya.
  • Also this: 

  • How did you two meet?  We were in a wicca group together and then fought off monsters with our psychic energy.  We held hands and it was all awesome.  Meet-Cute!
  • Nice electro-gun, Riley!
  • Buffy's scream is kinda chilling.
  • “I’m nothing special.”//”No, you are.”  OMG, Tara is so in love.
  • Ahh, I guess Olivia did know a little bit, though she didn’t believe it until now.
  • “I guess we have to talk.”  “I guess we do.”  Nothing.  Brilliant end.

Favorite Lines:
Zelda: "Can't even shout. Can't even cry. The Gentlemen are coming by. Looking in windows, knocking on doors. They need to take seven and they might take yours. Can't call to mom. Can't say a word. You're gonna die screaming but you won't be heard."
Daniel: “All you care about is lots of orgasms.” - Anya
**Note: Despite being a mostly silent episode, there were still so many brilliant lines to choose from.

Arc/Continuity Stuff:
Recurring: Walsh, Riley, Olivia, Anya, Forrest
First appearance: Tara
Buffy and Riley's first kiss.
Also, now Buffy knows Riley's a commando and Riley knows Buffy's a ... something fighty.
Tara inherited her witchy power from her mom.

Anya's Hair - short and brown
Dead Humans - 2 (we know they collect more hearts, but we're only counting the deaths we see)
Dead Undeads - 7 (same for this)
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 3
Apocalypse Called - 0