PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

REVIEW ARCHIVES

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

We Gotta Go See a Movie or Get in a Bar Fight

Episode 2.11: Donut Run. Original Airdate 1.25.06

"When Duncan disappears with Meg's baby, Lamb must work with two FBI agents to extract as much information as possible from an uncooperative Veronica. Meanwhile, Wallace reveals the real reason he returned to Neptune, and Weevil and Logan make a breakthrough in their hunt for the rogue gang member."


Daniel's Thoughts:

  • I mean – the banter between Veronica and Logan is so amazing and it’s a testament to the actors.  This whole snow white/mopey/sleazy word play is so quick.
  • Why…is Dick giving Veronica advice?  It’s weird.  Like they’re friends?  But also, of course he’s being sleazy.
  • And Duncan and Veronica are fighting.  In public.  And the first time I saw this, man.  But I know what this is really about.  And seeing this scene, knowing what’s coming is kinda cool.  It’s like having an inside track into the mind of Veronica and her plans.
  • She’s even playing Daddy Mars, sitting in her room in her sweats, listening to sappy music.  But here’s the thing.  It’s not a total act.  She does still love Duncan; this is still an end for her.
  • And Keith is such a good dad.  He’s always there for Veronica…even when she’s playing him.
  • Even Back-up’s trying to make Veronica feel better, licking her face.
  • And then there’s Wallace.  We didn’t really see what happened after Wallace came back in the last episode but it seems like he and Veronica are fast friends again.
  • But even he doesn’t know what’s going on.  And I think that says a lot about Veronica – nothing is more important than the mission.  No time for weaknesses. 
  • Duncan’s missing.  And now Veronica’s being charged with kidnapping. With absolutely no evidence.  So there’s that.
  • There's some evidence, but it's mostly circumstantial and Veronica easily explains it away.  She understands every second of this plan.  It’s why she was born to be a detective.
  • Ken Marino!  I love when he’s on this.
  • And besides class warfare, I don’t really get why Duncan’s mom hates Veronica so much. She’s helped them out a lot.  She found her daughter’s killer.
  • I’m glad Veronica brought up the fact to Lamb that he knows the kid is better off with Duncan than with the abusive Mannings.  I still don’t know why the Mannings haven’t been prosecuted.
  • Vinnie and Veronica – keep trying to bug each other.  I love it.  I love their friendly rivalry.
  • Are they actually having a class to teach them how to use a search engine?
  • Hey, it’s FBI Agent Xena.
  • Agent Xena is kind of an asshole.
  • And I mean, it’s Lamb, so I don’t care.
  • Agent Xena says she’s interrogated al qaeda members.  She can handle a teenager.
  • SHE HAS NOT MET VERONICA.  Love this set-up.
  • Lamb likes to think he’s smart.  But Veronica is twice as smart as he is, and always a few steps ahead.
  • Like if Agent Xena talked to me that way, I would not take it.  But…I’m not Lamb.
  • Ken Marino is so good.  And I like that Vinnie is smart enough to be a match for Veronica.  She needs a challenge – even though she will always win.
  • I haven’t been talking about this B plot at all with Logan and Weevil – because I mostly don’t care.  I do like them working together, though.
  • So Wallace has an “I know what you did last summer” plot line that he’s trying to run from.
  • It’s also nice that Veronica is taking time out of her Duncan shenanigans to follow up on her best friend Wallace.
  • I remember this phone call thing –  it's a well timed recording.  Those things can trick ya. 
  • And then finally the reveal that Veronica was *gasp* working with Duncan the whole time.
  • There are two bathrooms in this tiny tiny apartment?
  • Wuvs, the fake diapers.

We wuv it!

  • And now Keith has figured it out.  He *is* a detective.
  • Keith is really upset but the things he’s saying is breaking my heart.  He’s always so worried about her.  She’s capable, sure, but she’s still his child. 
  • And of course, even when he’s upset with her – he protects her: He hid the diapers.  He played it cool with the detectives.
  • Vinnie Van Lowe was in on it too?  I guess that’s what the letter was about.  I truly forgot that part.
  • It’s such a small thing, but I’m glad there’s a photo of Lilly in Veronica’s room.


  • And that’s a wrap for Duncan Kane.


Zelda's Thoughts:

  • whoooohooooo I'm excited for this twisty turny Duncan exit
  • though I'll admit right now that I don't understand the title of the episode
  • very considerate exposition in the elevator from Logan and V about Dead Meg, the baby, and LoVe baggage
  • And Duncan lies. "Where were you yesterday?" // "I stayed home." // "No, you didn't."
  • This fight is escalating quickly. And Veronica is acting the shit out of it. Note I said Veronica, not Kristen (although she is also acting the shit out of it) because IT'S ALL AN ACT
  • Except we only know that because this is Once More With Extreme Prejudice, where we know everything and remember knowing nothing.
  • So, like, I don't remember thinking "That was a sudden and extreme fight," and that's probably because the writers had been laying the groundwork for episodes leading up to this, of Duncan not communicating with V, and V's increasing frustration over it, so it's an earned explosion in that context, but also Public Breakup is Step One in Rescue Baby Lilly
  • Man, though, she's even gotta fool Keith (and it's working - for now) by mope mope moping at home (and sneaking food to Duncan)
  • Keith is just the best. "Anything you need, honey, I'm here."
  • Daniel and I were just talking about good parents and bad parents on TV. Keith's one of the good ones. Happy Father's Day, Keith!
  • HAHAHA SHE'S LISTENING TO THE DAWSON'S CREEK THEME SONG.
  • And we're still moving forward efficiently with the Detective Ship of Weevil and Logan. What's their ship name? Weegan? Lovil? WeeLo?
  • WALLACE HI WALLACE.
  • Gasp V's getting arrested for aiding and abeting Duncan "kidnapping" the baby! We think we know the truth - that she didn't - but for once, Lamb isn't wrong.
  • Keith is worried about V's future. Even Cliff looks disheveled.
  • God I love/hate Vinnie. He's the worst/best.
  • V to Celeste: "It's kinda weird, huh? Hoping Lamb is competent rather than betting he's not."
  • Vinnie: *mimes binoculars* // Veronica: *wtf face* // Vinnie: *whispers* call me
  • V to Lamb: Let me ask you a question. Do you think the baby is better off now, with Duncan, or with the Mannings?
  • But he's just concerned about the rich Kanes being mad at him. His righteous anger at abusive parents is long gone
  • Detective Logan is sending Dick in to buy ecstasy from the PCHers
  • "You're not real complicated, are you, Dick?" // "Try not to be." Fair.
  • hahahaha and Veronica caught the bugged pen Vinnie tried to drop in her bag. I love her.
  • Search Engine Olympics? What garbage class is this?
  • PLANET ZOWIE. HOW IS THAT A SEARCH ENGINE
  • Gasp! V discovers that Wallace was on the basketball team in Chicago, and lied about it
  • welp Hector is selling drugs
  • I love me some WeeLo espionage
  • HI LUCY LAWLESS HI
  • I loved you on Sporadicus
  • Lamb: "Veronica, why don't you wait outside in the hall?" // V: "Why don't you?" I just love how little she thinks of him. And how little Lucy Xena Cylon Lawless thinks of him.
  • Omg stop trying to flirt with Lucy Lawless, Lamb. She's so out of your league, she's out of your Battlestar Galaxy (I'm a little bit sorry but I also am not editing this out of my notes)
  • hahahah oh man the FBI agents really enjoy how much V mocks Lamb. They are us and we are they.
  • Veronica finds Vinnie camped out in a van watching her. "Mornin', Sam." // "Mornin', Ralph. Fritter?"
  • Hmmmmm. Now WeeLo are having a meeting in the boy's bathroom. Is this WeeLo's Office?
  • Weevil's shoulder tattoo says "The Good Must Suffer." Ouch, Weev.


  • "You know why the Reaper was called that?" // "He lost a bet?" Mr. Nickname-Granter is mocking nicknames?
  • Aw man, Wallace's real Chicago story is sad. His buddy Rashard did a hit and run.
  • V and Duncan, staging another public conversation, even sneakier this time: a phone conversation on a tapped line, and his half is entirely pre-recorded VERONICA IS SO SMART
  • And GASP they finally let the audience in on it, V sneaking into the apartment next door, and running to kiss Duncan, before sneaking him out for real.
  • And they have their final goodbye kiss, and I cheer.
  • Did we know the Mars apartment had two bathrooms?
  • Whoops Keith found the diapers and the secret door to the Duncan apartment.
  • But he has the presence of mind to play it cool in the voicemail he leaves her because he knows someone could be listening.
  • Welcome to Mexico, Sheriff Lamb, and whomever you just inadvertently sneaked into the country in your trunk.
  • Keith: "It's not just your life you're gambling with, Veronica. I would not survive without you."
  • "You played ME, Veronica" He's so hurt. "I love you, I'll always love you, but I don't know how I'll ever trust you again." ooof it hurts
  • But at least Keith destroyed the evidence before the FBI showed up
  • And then Lamb zooms right past a now-hitchhiking Duncan ... and finds the evidence of the ride-along once he pulls over.
  • This is so clever. I dig it. They even looped in Vinnie (at a price) and Astrid, to bring baby Lilly to meet Duncan in Mexico.
  • Although I gotta say, if Keith ever finds out that VINNIE was read in on the plan, but he wasn't? That's gonna sting. Same for Logan, if he ever learns the full story.
  • D: "She thinks you're Veronica." A: "Yeah so does the FBI"


Favorite Lines:

Daniel: Veronica: "I guess that makes me Snow White." Logan:"You must be on your way to see Mopey." Veronica:"How's he doing, Sleazy?" 
Zelda: Lamb: "Veronica, why don't you wait outside in the hall?" // Veronica: "Why don't you?"


Arc/Continuity:

Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Duncan, Logan, Weevil, Dick (Absent: Beaver, Jackie)
First Appearance: Super Huge Deputy
Recurring: Kendall Casablancas, Sheriff Don Lamb, Cliff McCormack, Deputy Jerry Sacks, Vinnie Van Lowe, Celeste Kane, Coach Preppernau (previously known as only Coach or Teacher), Hector, Sean Friedrich, Thumper, Astrid
Generally Known TV Face: Lucy Xena Cylon Lawless
Logan's Nicknames: Mopey (Duncan), Angel of Mercy (Veronica)
Veronica's Nicknames: Sleazy (Logan)
Sheriff Don Lamb's Nicknames: Brer Rabbit (Veronica)


Stats:

Dead Humans - 0
Backup Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - "Don't make daddy hose you down."
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0

Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Does Truman Capote Know?

Episode 2.10: One Angry Veronica. Original Airdate 12.07.05

"Veronica's day goes from bad to worse as she is called for jury duty over a case involving two 09ers and a Hispanic woman, but finds that Neptune is even more divided than she thought. Meanwhile, Keith helps Lamb track down the missing sex tapes, the key piece of evidence in the Aaron Echolls trial."

Zelda's Thoughts:


  • Veronica is mad at Duncan on account of the whole Meg is preg and Duncan didn't tell her.
  • At least it turns out he only just found out from that letter he found, and hasn't been sitting on it for months.
  • How the garbage does Dick know Meg woke up before either Veronica or Duncan know
  • gulp the Aaron Echolls sex tape evidence got stolen
  • And Meg, after apologizing to Veronica for being out of proportion mean to V, asks V to not let the Mannings give her baby up for adoption, if anything happens to her. Given that the alternate ending of the last episode (on the DVD) is Meg's mother attempting to smother her with a pillow, is the show implying that the Mannings kinda maybe murdered their eldest daughter? It's not a far cry from their horrific treatment of Grace, which HOW ARE THEY NOT IN JAIL FOR THAT, FUCK YOU LAMB YOU INCOMPETENT SHIT, I THOUGHT YOU'D AT LEAST HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE FOR THAT.
  • Jury Duty time! We don't get any of the fun voir dire or the trial, we just get the post-trial jury duty deliberations, a la Twelve Angry Men, from which the episode steals its title.
  • Sheriff Lamb, talking to Keith about the missing tapes while staring at himself in the mirror as he lifts weights. Very Patrick Bateman.
  • GUYS IT'S ALBA FROM JANE THE VIRGIN HI ALBA
  • (we already quietly said hi to Todd from Scrubs)
  • ALSO HI MICHAEL HYATT WHO IS ON EVERY SHOW INCLUDING THE WIRE BUT RIGHT NOW SHE'S ON CRAZY EX GIRLFRIEND i'm fine why is everyone shouting
  • This Jury room is a Who's Who of television shows
  • aw Deputy Sacks with his ridiculous mustache
  • these jurors being shitty about their civic duty sure is fun
  • "Is the racial stuff affecting your vote?" // "Is it affecting yours?"



  • oh hi Deputy Leo.
  • oh hi Thumper trying to intimidate Veronica about the trial. great. super. awesome.
  • Yeah seriously guys never leave Logan alone with something he can snoop through. Veronica learned that the hard way.
  • awwww it's all Christmassy at the Mars home. "I'm sorry, I was looking for my apartment, but I seem to have stumbled upon some sort of magical winter wonderland instead."
  • "I'm so impressed you fit a pony into my room!"
  • Aww Keith had Mac make V's laptop all fancypants and fast running ... and then planted info about one of the players in the trial
  • which is NOT OKAY. my sister recently served on a jury (every time I get called, they reject me but whatevs) and she was telling me that the jurors can't use any outside knowledge they might happen to have; they can only use the information brought into the trial. Keith is tampering and it's not cool.
  • dammit Logan, offering a reward for the sex tape. if it were to get it back into evidence to convict his father, I'd be okay with this. and I get that he doesn't want the tabloids to get their hands on it. but he's gonna destroy them. he's part of the reason Aaron gets away with it.
  • god this shitty alpha male who condescendingly decided Veronica is the jury foreman, then spends all his time trying to boss her around. can we just punch him repeatedly? is that cool?
  • Logan didn't destroy the evidence til he made himself watch all of it first. Christ. Keith: "For that experience, you paid fifty grand?"
  • and then Keith figures out that the only person at the sheriff's office kind enough to sell the tapes to Logan would have to be Deputy Leo. I'm disappointed you stole them in the first place, Leo. wtf.
  • "I'll never, ever send two boys from good families to jail on the word of that Mexican whore." Hey look, we found Rape Culture Man. Good families = they're white and from the wealthy side of town and also MALE and therefore unimpeachable. She's a woman of color. She must be lying.
  • god this guy is the fucking worst.
  • ooooh it's time for the television contrivance of the local university that luckily is a great school, affordable (at least with scholarships), and keeps our leads local!
  • thanks for recruiting Veronica, Michael Hyatt! at least they're calling it Hearst and not UCNeptune.
  • And our Leo D'Amato is no longer a Deputy, and Aaron will (as we know) get away with it.
  • And Meg is dead, due a to a "blood clot"
  • I guess since no one makes any noise, we're to assume it was a natural cause and not foul play, but seriously what was that alternate ending last episode.
  • RIP, Meg. Veronica will rescue your kid! She promised.
  • WALLACE IS FINALLY BACK WELCOME BACK WALLACE 



  • "Happy New Year!"
  • When the knock came at the door, I jokingly said Veronica's "I was hoping it would be you" but then it was WALLACE and it was very sweet. Besties!
  • Btw, Jackie hasn't been in ANY of the episodes where Wallace has been gone. I guess she's only relevant as a love interest for Wallace? Blargh. [Blargh - Alison Bechdel]



Daniel's Thoughts:

  • It’s Christmas time.  You can tell because the students are wearing light jackets. (and Santa hats.)
  • And this lovely cafeteria morsel:



  • Dick is such a 90s boy.
  • The news from last episode – Meg woke up – has hit Veronica and Duncan.
  • Can’t they leave Lilly alone?  Who would steal those tapes.
  • So they’re not discussing what Veronica discovered about Meg’s parents and the way the kids are treated – but the way Meg is vaguely talking about not wanting her parents to get custody of her kid – Veronica doesn’t need to say anything.  She knows. 
  • Jury duty?  So does that mean Veronica’s 18?  Can they do it so soon?  I didn’t get my first summons until I was out of college, I think.
  • So they’re skipping the part where jurors are picked.  Veronica is on the jury and I guess they’ve already heard the case?  It’s right to the jury room.  That was fast.
  • Lamb is kinda douche-hot.  Shut up.  You’re all thinking it.
  • I’m surprised he’s even helping Keith out.  Why’s he being so helpful?
  • Is it the endorphins?
  • If Veronica is Foreman, why is Patronizing Douche leading it?
  • Hey it’s Alba! Jane’s grandmother from Jane the Virgin! (Great show if you haven’t seen it.)
  • “Ned Flanders type”  of course brings up the “past criminal behavior” – as if that’s an automatic guilty plea.
  • Deputy Sachs – I guess we’ll never get to see how his date with Miss Hauser went.
  • Everyone is so patronizing.  
  • Yay, Alba is the hold out.
  • HEY DEPUTY LEO IS BACK!  Man, Veronica shoulda stayed with him.
  • I’m glad Veronica isn’t sequestered but it’s a little scary that Thumper found out she was on the jury duty – and sought her out.
  • Logan and Keith are playing niceish. 
  • Inga!
  • Wow, jury duty all day and Veronica still had time to decorate the apartment for Christmas.
  • Me:  Is she drinking wine?  Keith: Are you drinking wine now?
  • This jury duty plot as the mystery of the week is kinda dull – but at least it’s a way for Veronica to get some more real world experience.
  • But I’m also really bored by it.
  • Patronizing shitbag doesn’t want to vote for an acquittal even though the vote is against him now – so it has absolutely nothing to do with wanting to leave.  Which – Surprise, surprise.
  • And there it is – complete racial bias.
  • “Let me take this moment to thank you, for the lesson in civic responsibility.”
  • What a surprise, there’s a college in Neptune.  Like that college in Sunnydale.
  • So she’s 18, half way through her senior year…and she doesn’t know where she’s going to school yet? Especially someone as driven as Veronica?

Lynda's Thoughts

  • Let me start with some hard hitting facts – I want Veronica’s jacket.
  • So we’re just diving straight into The Talk.
  • Duncan already knew about the baby and a blindsided Veronica is the only one shocked by this revelation.
  • Duncan:


  • “This has nothing to do with us”.  Oh Duncan.  You are SUCH a doof.
  • And here’s what appears to be the comedic ice-breaker Dick but is actually bomb-dropper Dick.  Meg is awake!
  • Wow, Veronica is hurt and mad and STILL her immediate plan is to help Duncan.  She really IS amazing.
  • The Kane-Echolls sex-tapes are gone and here begins a storyline that should be one episode but again has far-reaching consequences that will keep coming back to haunt us for episodes (seasons) to come.
  • Surprise is right.
  • Ugh, Meg’s parents are EVIL.
  • Meg is too sweet.  Apologising to Veronica for being awful to her oh and also asking just a teeny tiny favour.  You can totally see how easily Veronica went with the plan that involved deceiving her own dad.  How could she refuse this heart breaking request?
  • Lasagna + ice cream = jury duty
  • I remember being excused from jury duty after my boss wrote a letter and feeling so relieved they needed me so badly.  It was for a six week murder trial and there is no way at 22 I would have coped with that.
  • Aww, it’s kinda cute that Keith doesn’t know what spotting is.
  • Oh hi there Lamb’s abs.  And biceps… and… ahem.  Sorry.
  • So we’ve got new security measures in place for Veronica to try to get around at some point.  That’ll be fun!
  • Oh it’s Abuela!  And she’s speaking English!




  • And it’s Dr Akopian!




  • Wow, sooo many douchebags in one jury.
  • Ooh Abuela’s got SASS.
  • Deputy Leo is back!  This usually means bad news for him.
  • Blinky?  Humpty?  Zorro?  Bahahaha
  • Oh no, Logan is in a good mood so that means he’s about to have his heart crushed again.
  • “My name’s not dude, it’s Mr Mars”.  [If you're nasty - Janet]
  • OMG that elf hat and the dress, it’s all too adorable!



  • “I’m so impressed you fit a pony into my room” hahaha never change, V.
  • Keith talking laptop is hilarious and adorable.
  • Ohhh Keith.  Adorable AND cunning.
  • What the heck is Abuela knitting anyway because that looks like one long-ass scarf.
  • Dammit, Logan, don’t do that to yourself!
  • Aaaand there goes their only evidence.  Dammit, Logan!
  • Kindness at the sheriff’s department.  Well that took about .25 seconds for Keith to work out.
  • Douchebag’s gonna douche…
  • Oooh Dr Akopian works at Hearst and wants Veronica to attend.  What a coincidence!
  • OMG even when they’re saying thank you the PCHers are dicks!
  • I feel so bad for Leo.  He’s SUCH a sweetheart.
  • At least Keith kept him out of serious trouble.
  • Ugh.  Keith telling Veronica about Meg makes me cry every single time.  KB always breaks me!
  • And a late night knock at the Mars’ apartment door means only one thing, and that’s a visitor who’s about to rock Veronica’s world.
  • WAAAALLAAAACE!!!  I legit forgot it was him.  After such a sad scene I love this ending.


Crossfire!
Patronizing Shit: patronizes
D: Patronizing Shit
Z: That might be the character's name (seriously, the juror's names are all their tropes, not actual names)

Favorite Lines:
Zelda:  "I'm sorry, I was looking for my apartment, but I seem to have stumbled upon some sort of magical winter wonderland instead." - Keith
Daniel: “Let me take this moment to thank you for the lesson in civic responsibility.” - Veronica
Lynda: "I'm so impressed you fit a pony into my room" - Veronica


Arc/Continuity:
Neptune Roll Call: Wallace (Wallace!), Duncan, Logan, Dick (Absent: Weevil, Beaver, Jackie)
Recurring: Woody Goodman, Meg Manning, Sheriff Don Lamb, Deputy Jerry Sacks, Deputy Leo D'Amato, Lloyd Blankenship, Thumper, Veronica's other job, Inga
Generally Known TV Face: Michael Hyatt (Women's Studies Professor Juror), Robert Maschio (Sports Guy Juror), Ivonne Coll (Knitting Grandmother Juror)



Stats:
Dead Humans - 1
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? -
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - DOES FINALLY COMING HOME COUNT
Veronica Wants a Pony - 1
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0

Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Chicks Dig Scars and Acronyms

Episode 2.09: My Mother, the Fiend. Original Airdate 11.30.05

"After finding her mother's old permanent record at school, Veronica wonders how well she knew her mother at all, and decides to investigate her mother's school friends. Meanwhile, Trina takes the role of director in the school play, and while she has a confrontation with Kendall, Veronica has one with Celeste."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Hey, Miss Hauser is back.  Oh man, it’s that thing that tv shows do in sex ed class that we never did.  But they’ve graduated from using an egg to using a baby doll that reacts to things.  Welcome to a rich kids' school. [We did the egg thing in middle school; by high school, they gave up on us. - Z]
  • Seriously – the baby dolls have memory chips.  Some schools can’t get textbooks.
  • Interesting that 1) Duncan is in this class now when he wasn’t in the last episode.  And Gia was in the last class and now isn’t.  2) That there’s an even number of men and women and how hetero-sexist to pair them up.
  • And Beav meets Mac and…we want so hard to believe that this is the start of a beautiful friendship but Zelda and I know better.  But it was an aww moment at the time.
  • Ugh, Trina Echolls is back.  Doesn’t she have to know how to act to teach acti- oh how na├»ve I am sometimes.
  • Isn’t it convenient that Veronica’s detention led her to something about her mother?
  • Uh oh.  Weevil, when the lights mysteriously go out, there’s something wrong.
  • Too bad Wallace isn’t here to see Weevil taped up to a pole.  Why is this such a popular version of payback in Neptune?
  • I like Mr. Vice Principal.
  • Principal Allan: “I’m sure your mom turned into a terrific person.”  ….errrr.
  • Ugh, Trina.  It’s just painful unnecessary torture.
  • Willow scene.  Now it’s Cordelia’s turn.
  • She’s still trying to get Duncan into bed.
  • Why is Duncan not pushing her off his lap?  Oh there he goes.  I mean that should be immediate.
  • OMG. Cordelia and Willow in one scene!

Buffy reunion!

  • Wow, weirdly Alyson Hannigan is much better when her character is sparring with Charisma Carpenter.  Practice?  Strange.
  • I love that this woman is still reliving her HS years sharing gossip with Veronica. 
  • It’s nice and a little sad that Keith is still defending Lianne.
  • Oh man, Trina doing Shakespeare.
  • OMG Celeste (‘s assistant) still does Duncan's laundry.
  • Man, Veronica is so relentless when it comes to Celeste.
  • Hey, another Newspaper class teacher.
  • There’s so much graffiti on the bathroom walls – but it feels so organized, it’s so weird.  And who is this "Big John Brown?"


  • This website that Mac is making is so early 2000s.
  • I love that everyone is calling her – “The Prom Baby”.
  • How convennnieeent that there’s a mirror right where Veronica needs one in Trina’s hospital room. I don't recall there being mirrors in hospital rooms unless they're in the restroom.
  • Aww, it’s nice how easily Trina accepts her mother, Mary.
  • And it’s always nice for Veronica to find out that her mom was a nice person in high school.
  • All the extras with no lines gaping at Principal whatshisname.  So good.
  • Hey Clemmons set this whole thing up.  He’s so good and it’s fantastic how much he’s grown on me since the series started.  It’s amazing how much he’s grown on Veronica, too.
  • And now he’s Principal Clemmons.


  • Q: Why was Veronica called in to pick up Abel Koontz’s things? A: To see Meg is pregnant!  Gasp!
  • And another Gasp!  Meg’s awake!

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • aw damn Clemmons is taking Veronica's sneaky keys. But they were all we had left of Wallace! :(
  • ugh Beaver and Mac are having their first scene together and I'm already ready to beat him up for when he hurts her
  • I love that Clemmons - months later - punishes Veronica for breaking into his office, with the actual long-con intent of sparking her investigator brain to uncover Moorehead's skeleton in the closet. He's quite the Slytherin
  • and whoops, it's time for Logan to take his revenge on Weevil
  • fuck, I forgot that that revenge consisted of shame-taping him to the flagpole, like the PCHers usually do
  • oh hey I've got a shenanigan! We walk into Trina supposedly holding either auditions or rehearsals and the room is filled with mostly guys. HAHAHAHA no that's not how high school theater works
  • everything about Kendall hitting on Duncan is terrible
  • oh look a Buffy reunion! Willow vs. Cordelia but now they're both empty headed bitcas.
  • wow Trina cast herself as Ophelia
  • ... why is there a skull on the stage. why is the stage the size of the stage at the Caffe Cino (that was an off-off-broadway reference, kids)
  • why is contrivance, basically
  • "You don't actually listen when I talk, do you?" I love the Marses
  • le gasp Celeste Kane is here hi Celeste Kane
  • I find it adorable (do I?) that Weevil and Logan agree to team up to find out who killed Felix, and seal the deal by beating the shit out of each other.


  • No wonder people ship these two
  • speaking of ships, Beaver and Mac are being cute and Mac's hair looks adorable and I HATE YOU BEAVER.
LOOK HOW ADORABLE SHE IS

  • When I watch these scenes, I do wonder how much Kyle Gallner knew. I'm betting they told him zilch.
  • le GASP the prom baby was LE GASP WILLOW ROSENBERG
  • I love what a bad actor Veronica is in this fake scene with Trina
  • I think this whole Trina-was-adopted is a biiiiiiiiit of a contrivey retcon. Didn't they just refer to her as Logan's stepsister last season? My memory is lazy.
  • It is nice to be reminded that, after we suspected the worst, Lianne did have some redeeming qualities. She'd have to, to have Keith fall in love with her, after all.
  • "Are you keeping a dead rat in our freezer or do we have a slam-dunk lawsuit against the processed food industry?"


  • ugh Veronica, the rat under the seat in the bus was not a message for you. the bus crash wasn't about you. she probably thinks that song about being vain is about her, too.
  • hahahaha Veronica recognizing Clemmons's plan: "You read Machiavelli this summer, didn't you?"
  • dannnnnng, he already had the Principal Mr. Van Clemmons nameplate ready
  • oh right, finally the reveal that Meg is preggers
  • I'm excited about the pregnancy mostly bc Duncan's exit is a great twisty plot but also Duncan leaves

Lynda's Thoughts:

  • Welcome to parenthood.  Ha.  Haha.  Oh Duncan.
  • And here’s Mr Clemmons using what he’s learnt from Veronica.  She just got plaaaaayed.
  • Clemmons is not messing around today!
  • Oh damn, Veronica is finally seeing a real consequence to her cockiness.
  • Mac and Cassidy meeting to work together is just bittersweet now.  I feel so sorry for Mac.
  • And Veronica has to do admin work for detention.  (I’m actually a little jealous, I love organising so this seems like way more fun than any of my detentions!)
  • Ooh Lianne was suspended with Mrs Hauser!
  • Oh Mr Clemmons, you wily minx.
  • It’s Weevil!
  • Oh crap, it’s also Logan.
  • Heh, Mrs Hauser is NOT a fan of Lianne Mars.  Join the club.
  • I feel torn when I see Weevil taped to the flagpole.  Torn between feeling sorry for him and enjoying his sexy tortured look at Veronica.
  • Ha, Veronica is practically Mr Clemmons’ puppet.
  • Lianne was a fiend.  Yeah she was.
  • V’s face when Mr Moorehead says she must had turned into a terrific person LOL
  • I know we’re supposed to believe Lianne was nice between her school days and drunken cheque stealing days but she just never came across as someone who could land someone as nice as Keith.
  • Trina!  Mwah!  Mwah!
  • Actually, Alyson is quite funny here.  And I love her hair.
  • And Cordelia Casablancas is back at the penthouse.  I’m still not convinced Duncan didn’t do anything with her that other time.
  • I have to agree with Kendall, that doll IS creepy.
  • Willow and Cordelia!
  • “Rode hard, meet put away wet”
  • “I’m guessing she’s the wet one”


  • I keep thinking Lianne and Madison Sinclair are very similar people.
  • Ooh, more baby drama!
  • Aww, Keith looking after Veronica’s baby is sweet.
  • Yeah, it’s hard loving a parent when you know they’ve been a really shitty person.
  • Cassidy using Kendall’s thievery to get her to help him is the first real sign of his scheming ways.
  • “You don’t actually listen when I talk, do you?”  I think her face says it all Keith!
  • Aww Daddy Duncan.  “At least you brought the baby up this time” *snort*
  • Oh hi Celeste.


  • Well, that exchange got heated pretty quick!
  • But V figuring Astrid out was even quicker.
  • Aww, Cute and cheesy Logan who we don’t see much of lately.
  • That outfit though.


  • Aww, Weevil and Logan really do have the best bromance.
  • I still can’t get over your high schools having their own security guards.  What a messed up country. [editor's note: Lynda lives in New Zealand]
  • Mac and Cassidy geeking out should be so cute but it just makes me mad and sad.
  • Ha, Veronica has her own fake sign for using Keith’s desk.  Nothing is sacred.


  • PROM BABY IS TRINA WHAT
  • Veronica really needs to check intel before sharing it as fact.
  • But I really love that Trina is into doing V’s plan.
  • But wait, Celeste isn’t Prom Mom!
  • I might be reading too much into a very small moment but I think the last hug between Mary and Trina is genuine on Trina’s part.  She really did have shitty adoptive parents and I think even though Lunch Lady Doris was a horrifying thought for her at first, this is possibly one of the first moments of genuine, unselfish love she has ever been shown in her life.


  • “What a difference a letter makes”.  Yes Veronica, it does.  Right, Duncan?
  • OMG Trina dreamt she had movie star parents.  Veronica’s reaction is my reaction.


  • GASP PROM DAD IS PRINCIPAL MOOREHEAD
  • Oh yeah.  Bus crash.  And V assumes the rat was for her because of course she does.
  • Vice Principal Clemmons, you sly old dog indeed.
  • And all of Duncan’s secrets are about to be revealed.  OH BABY.

Crossfire!
Beaver: Mac!
D & Z: *uncomfortable sounds*
D: I wanna aww but oh.

Favorite Lines:
Daniel: "And I can't use magic right?" - Veronica, being assigned to organize the file room.
Zelda: "Are you keeping a dead rat in our freezer or do we have a slam-dunk lawsuit against the processed food industry?" - Veronica
Lynda: "Rode hard, meet put away wet." - Logan, introducing Willow and Cordelia

Arc/Continuity:
Neptune Roll Call: Duncan, Logan, Weevil, Beaver (Absent: Wallace, Dick, Jackie)
First Appearance: Astrid
Recurring: Deborah Hauser, Vice Principal Van Clemmons, Cindy "Mac" Mackenzie, Principal Alan Moorehead, Trina Echolls, Kendall Casablancas, Celeste Kane, Mrs. Murphy, Hector, Thumper, Meg Manning
Veronica's Alias: adult Veronica Mars P.I.
Logan's Nicknames: Rode Hard (Trina), Put Away Wet (Kendall)

Stats:
Dead Humans - 1 (confirmation that Abel Koontz is dead)
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 2
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 1
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 1 (Celeste wasn't the Prom Baby Mom)

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Sometimes a Cigar Store is Just a Cigar Store

Episode 2.08: Ahoy Mateys. Original Airdate 11.23.05

"Veronica helps Keith determine who is haunting a school bus crash victim's parents, who are currently embroiled in a suit against the school district. Meanwhile, after Logan asks for help fighting the murder charge against him, Veronica stumbles into a dangerous situation with the local Irish mob. Later, Weevil's leadership of the P.C.H. Bikers is put into question."



Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Even Duncan's dreams are expressionless and dull. Sorry Meg.
  • Meanwhile Logan and V are conferencing about his case. "Pretend for a moment that your dog's life is at stake."
  • Daniel and I both just yelled WEEVIL because he's finally effing back.
  • And the kid from High School Musical thinks Weevil owes him some drugs because all latino biker boys look the same
  • But also oops someone in the PCHers is selling drugs and Weevil doesn't know about it
  • We've known Danny Boyd all of three seconds and he's already completely awful.
  • Welcome to the Fighting Fitzpatrick crime family bar.
  • And we are now told that Dr. Griffith is a "friend of the [Fitzpatrick] family."
  • But Molly blows Veronica's cover. Gulp.
  • Thanks Molly. Thanks a lot.
  • Fucking hell. Liam Fitzpatrick holding Veronica to the pool felt by the throat.
  • Yay Logan is here to help but shit Logan has a gun. "Stop. I've had a very bad year."


  • God it kills me. Veronica's crying, not because of what almost happened to her, but because Logan's running around with a gun and he could get himself killed. She may be furious with him, she may be disappointed with him, but these two still care about each other, hello my ship.
  • We're dealing with another bus victim, Marcos, but no one seems to remember him.
  • MAC HI MAC
  • And Mac immediately recognizes the radio show, yet another thing everyone at Neptune High but Veronica knows about.
  • "Sorry, I was just seeing how long we could have a conversation with your side only being questions." Mac, I love you, never go.
  • I also especially love that she knows her work and, like Veronica, chargers her classmates for her services.
  • V's mad at Weevil now because the Fitzpatricks sending Dr. Griffith in to frame Logan is some kind of gesture toward helping the PCHers, and V wants to know why. And so does Weevil.
  • "Now I'm just checking something. Am I still in charge here?"
  • "The night Felix got killed, did you see the guy who called the cops?" // "No man." // "Why not, you were there?"
  • And we've got a flashback that we in the future know isn't true, that Logan did stab Felix.
  • Veronica and Mac should solve everything together.
  • HAHAHA they traced the signal to VP Clemmons's house.
  • omg she just quoted Rocky Horror, how did I never catch that before. "I'm glad we caught you at home. Would you mind if we used your phone. We're both in a bit of a hurry."
  • heh, Vincent/"Butters" is responsible for the radio show (along with Marcos, RIP)
  • great. great. super. Marcos's  parents sent him to one of those de-gaying camps. fuck them so much.
  • oh shit, I forgot this happened now. the PCHers are abducted and torturing Logan, to get him to confess to murdering Felix. well, psychologically torturing him.
  • fuck this is hard to watch
  • but he managed to pick their pockets for the phone when they dump him afterwards, and now he knows it was Weevil on the other end
  • When Keith found the alarm code written across the back of the law firm stationery, I remarked that it was all very "pat." Keith agreed - he knows Mr. Oliveres planted that. So he's shitty in multiple ways.
  • You know what, Duncan, if you wanna have your little sex dreams about Meg where Veronica's the villain, fine. Go away.
Daniel's Thoughts:


  • Oh hey, it’s Meg.   Oh Duncan’s having some weird dream where Meg’s a saint and Veronica’s some kind of criminal.
  • So Duncan keeps seeing Logan and Veronica whispering and she’s not exactly confiding in him.
  • Also Duncan keeps thinking about Meg.
  • Weevil!
  • The bus crash s/l continues.  We get one of the names: Marcos.
  • Now someone’s harassing his parents? As if they’re not suffering enough?  Who could be so cruel?
  • The amount of times an older man hits on Veronica knowing she’s under 18 is insane. #HerToo #WeShouldHaveHadaStat #Gross
  • Uh oh.  Veronica – get outta that bar.  And someone recognizes her.  
  • Aww Logan saved Veronica.  They just can’t stay away from each other.  They’ll always be entwined. 
  • It’s rare when we see Veronica completely and totally scared.  And Kristen Bell is so good at it.
  • Ryan, the kid in class – is on General Hospital.   He used to be a regular but now he’s recurring.
  • That’s the worst.  You (Marcos) die and no one still knows who you are.
  • It’s funny that this is the first time we meet the actual principal of the school.
  • Hey it’s Mac!  Weevil and Mac in one episode? Whoo!
  • Veronica tries but she’s not used to having friends.  I love Mac, though, and they should be best friends.
  • We’ve had a ‘mensch’ & a ‘schmuck’ in this episode. Also the words.
  • Ah, so Weevil actually had no idea of what Veronica was accusing him of. This correlates to what happened earlier with some 09er asking for the coke he bought.  So who’s trying to Brutus Weevil?
  • Fake flashback with Logan stabbing Felix.
  • Veronica & Mac are so cute.  They really need to investigate more often.
  • The Rocky Horror quote – that was hilarious and subtle – only fans of the movie would get it.
 "I'm glad we caught you at home. Would you mind if we used your phone. We're both in a bit of a hurry."

  • Pump up the Volume - Man, so many pop culture references, my brain is exploding.  But does the pop culture reference dictate the plot or does the plot dictate the pop culture reference?
  • Why would someone just throw out the alarm code they were given secretly in the house they were breaking into?  I’d call shenanigans but Keith already is.
  • Oops, Logan’s been kidnapped.  Time for Veronica to return the favor from earlier.
  • Seeing Logan be the scared one is actually kinda refreshing.
  • But he’s still savvy – stealing that cell phone pretending to be unconscious.
  • Butters: “Will you just graduate already?” 
  • It’s the 90s/00s so it’s still full of teens that can’t be out.  I mean, we haven’t come much farther than that but at least LGBT teens are somewhat better represented in today’s shows.
  • Duncan having prophetic dreams about Meg is the beginning of the end…we just don’t know it yet.  

Lynda's Thoughts:

  • Oh okay and we’re just opening with a creepy sex dream about Meg.  I’m covering my eyes until I hear it’s over.  They’re really stepping up the “you shouldn’t like Duncan” vibe.
  • Which, also, why are you dreaming that Veronica is the bad one when YOU’RE the one still keeping secrets from her?  Huh Duncan?  Why? WHY?
  • Ooh and here’s our first mention of upcoming recurring character Danny Boyd.
  • Weevil!  Being hit up by an 09er for coke.  Someone’s been a BAD gang member.  Wait…  that’s… kinda what they’re meant to do?
  • Ha, easiest way to scare off a rich white boy is to threaten his rims.
  • And we’re on to this episode's case – someone is messing with Marcos Oliveres’ parents since his death in the bus crash.  Neptune is MESSED. UP.
  • Aww LoVe working a case together makes me both happy and sad.  They are so much better suited than Duncan and Veronica.
  • Actually, I know we’re supposed to be happy for V that she’s with Duncan but he’s really better suited to Meg too because they’re both just… meh.
  • And here’s Danny Boyd.  He’s that nasty combo of stupid and gross but also a little funny.
  • Only Veronica is allowed to joke about her small boobs!
  • Don’t follow him Veronica!
  • She's following him .  Argh.  (Get it?  Argh?  Nevermind.  Sorry.)
  • Okay so the Fitzpatricks are actually quite scary.  They’re VERY mean.
  • Oh hi Logan.  Nice gun.  WHAT.
  • See, Duncan would never have gone in after her. Or actually succeeded in helping her escape.
  • And a rare Veronica breakdown that PLOT TWIST is only a little partly (in my head anyway) because she got a real fright but mostly because she’s scared for Logan.
  • Honestly, Veronica’s theory that the school board is in on the harassment doesn’t actually seem that implausible.  Neptune, amirite?
  • “Not pictured”.  Heh.
  • Either Mars doing a bit to get information is always entertaining.
  • And the school paid for the device so V is feeling just a wee bit smug.
  • Huh.  I sometimes forget Clemmons isn’t the principal (yet – ha!  Veronica has a way of rubbing off on people…)
  • Hi Mac!  Thanks for providing the backstory on the radio show!
  • Mac calling out V is adorable and reminds me of when Wallace does it.  So cute.  Wallace, Wallace, Wallace.
  • Damn.  Captain Crunk is NASTY.
  • Yes Veronica.  What HAS gotten into Duncan?
  • Oh Veronica.  Why must you always accuse Weevil?
  • Weevil is so badass confronting all his boys and then makes me cackle with “go scare some old ladies or something”. 
  • Thumper induced rage.  What a lying liar!




  • And we’re pausing because my cat is sitting on my notebook.
  • “We’re going to find out what’s true”.  Yeah you are
  • Oops we’ve tracked the radio station to Mr Clemmons’ house.
  • Poor Mac gets thrown under the bus but goes with it.  Now that is how you do tech support.
  • “Why are you so crabby?” lol
  • So the gap in the show was caused by straight camp.  Not feeling quite so bad for Marcus’ parents now…
  • And Keith has a better theory involving the neighbour but it turns out to be some weird beer thing.




  • Ooh a kidnapping, now we’re talking!
  • Even though these are the kind of guys who don’t really do anything too bad for a gang they did burn his house down so this scene is always pretty terrifying.
  • Ohhhhh shit, Logan has the phone and knows Weevil was behind it.  I love these two and their frenemyship (I don't know the proper word!)
  • “Will you graduate already?” I feel like both father and son think this on a regular basis.
  •  Keith does some serious detecting and notices the fish have been fed and ta-da that means the latest bus was planted by the clients themselves.  But we still don’t know who the real prankster is!
  •  Oh wait.  It’s Ryan.  He was in love with Marcus and mad at his parents and he’s not even sorry.


  • Oh no. No no no no another Meg dream.  STOP IT.
  • I’m assuming they’re thinking we need reasons to dislike Duncan so it’s not such a blow when he leaves but like… would anyone really have cared?  They could have left out the whole secrets and shadiness and sex dreams and we would have been fine with him leaving to take care of his daughter.   I just deleted a massive rant, I’m stopping here!



Crossfire!
Veronica (to Logan): But if I need anyone punched in the face, I'll whistle for ya
Daniel: And then we'll have a stat!


Favorite Lines:
Zelda: 

Daniel: 
"I'm glad we caught you at home. Would you mind if we used your phone? We're both in a bit of a hurry." - Veronica quoting Rocky Horror.
Lynda: "Will you just graduate already?" - Butters



Arc/Continuity:
Neptune Roll Call: Duncan, Logan, Weevil (Absent: Wallace, Dick, Beaver, Jackie)
First Appearance: Danny Boyd, Liam Fitzpatrick, Principal Alan Moorehead, Ryan, Molly Fitzpatrick, Kelly Kuzzio (Wanna Score Boy)
Recurring: Meg Manning, Vice Principal Van Clemmons, Cindy "Mac" Mackenzie, Thumper, Hector, Felix Toombs, Vincent "Butters" Clemmons
Generally Known TV Face: Lucas Grabeel (Kelly Kuzzio/Wanna Score Boy), Bradford Anderson (Ryan)
Veronica's Alias: Laurie Zachs
Keith's Alias: angry caller to tech support (re: MP3 player with Marcos's voice)
Logan's Nicknames: Nip/Schmuck (Dr. Tom Griffith), Mars-wan Kenobi (Veronica)


Stats:


Dead Humans - 0
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 1
Mac Hacks - 1
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor -0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

No, Gia, Chlamydia is Not a Flower

Episode 2.07: Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner. Original Airdate 11.16.05

"Veronica goes undercover after Duncan comes to her with a plea to help him find out which one of the children Meg was babysitting was being mentally abused by their parents. Meanwhile, Dick, Beaver and Kendall are visited by their lawyer, who informs them of Big Dick's wishes."

We'd like to welcome another friend to join us on some upcoming posts! Welcome, Lynda.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Firstly, I thought the title was wrong, that it should be the corner and not a corner....but IMDB tells me I'm wrong
  • Veronica’s trying to watch The Big Lebowski.  You know that totally overrated movie that straight boys like?  Don’t @ me. But you know, Veronica’s not “like other girls” – that whole trope.  Whatever.  Duncan wants to make out. And I think that’s a much better use of their time. [Yeah, well, you know, that's just like your opinion, man. - The Dude]
  • Poor Logan acts like a third wheel but he’s invited Cordelia over so it’s okay.
  • Re: Kendall’s age: Veronica: She’s 25.  Me: YOU’RE 25.  (Kristen was in fact 25 when filming this episode.  ....Charisma was 35.)
  • I’m glad they brought back Mr. Pope.  He seems to be OK after learning his investment won’t get him that boat he wants.
  • I’ve never seen a class like this in HS – A class about real world stuff like investments.  I was too busy learning math I’d never use again.
  • Guttenberg’s back and we still don’t know what a monster he is.
  • Except he’s showing some of his true colors now by talking like a privileged asshole.
  • Logan is wearing a slytherin shirt, before it was cool


  • What is with Logan using Veronica’s “office” as his own?
  • So we’ve got two plots this week:  Logan trying to get vindicated, and apparently Meg has some emails about trying to save an abused kid.
  • Lol.  Meg truly was a saint – she babysat everyone.  These kids with so much time on their hands.
  • And Duncan knew Meg well…and all her jobs.
  • Lamb on that invite – omg.  He’s so swarmy.


  • I’m pretty sure I have Dick’s jacket.
  • “See how much you’re sneezing when you have gonorrhea” What?
  • I love how Veronica totally inceptions Gia. “You should come to my house!”
  • “You’re 40 and he’s gone.” OMG. That book title.
  • School, part time job, investigating and now fake babysitting. SERIOUSLY WHEN DOES SHE DO HOMEWORK?
  • The kid’s crayons are called JOSHOLA.  Can they not afford Crayola?
  • OMG, this kid's dad, the way this smarmy asshole just casually invites Veronica to smoke pot with him and fool around like he’s talking about his day.
  • Hey, a Wallace mention.  That’s great?
  • Andddd….now she’s inceptioned Miss Hauser.
  • Cass and Beav’s real mom looks like Mia Farrow in Rosemary’s baby.
And she did kind of give birth to devil's spawn ...

  • Wow.  All these parents are wound so tight.  These poor kids are going to need so much therapy.
  • A plastic surgeon who tells a potential patient that they’re fine the way they are: mensch, according to Veronica.  But we’ll see…
  • Gia’s kinda adorable.  Annoying but adorable.
  • Cordelia?  Not great at inceptioning.  She’s trying to get Logan to invite her to stay with him but Logan sees right through it.
  • “Bessie, when the milk stops being free, I stop paying for it”.  Eww, Logan.  I mean, I’m not exactly pro Kordelia but.
  • Veronica is in teenage girl hell.
  • And here’s some hints about what the monster that Goodman is.
  • “You’ll always be 9 to me, going on 30.” – Aww.
  • Aww, Lilly reference, about her secret hiding spots.
  • Man, the abuse of Meg and her sisters are so absolutely frightening, the psychological torture.
  • Just when you think Lamb is the absolute worst – and he is – he finally does the right thing, based on his own abuse, I guess.  Which makes you wonder if that’s the cause of why he’s such a loathsome distrusting asshole.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Duncan: trying to make out with Veronica. Veronica: speaking The Dude's lines along with Jeff Bridges. #priorities.
  • Duncan turned off The Big Lebowski. Break up with that tool.
  • Ew. Logan's still with Kendall the Grown Ass Adult
  • heh and she recognizes Veronica from her iPod recon
  • I was thinking about feeling bad for Logan, living with Duncan while he's canoodling with his ex, but then Kendall showed up and it's gross
  • And Duncan is acting like a 25 year old sleeping with a teenager is fine. Great. This world is great.
  • Ugh Beaver. I do not find you endearing because I know the future.
  • And Dick is a moron.
  • And Woody is the worst.
  • And Duncan is shadily once again not communicating with Veronica
  • Le Gasp! Logan has commandeered Veronica's Office!
  • "Honestly, how much easier would your life be if you were indifferent to me?"
  • And at first it looks like V isn't going to help Logan, but of course she is, because she can't resist fixin' injustice and solvin' mysteries.
  • Oh right, Meg's hard drive. Okay, at least Duncan is communicating with Veronica. A second mystery to investigate!
  • Ugh, this is pretty awful, what the parents do to the kids. And the reveal that it was the Mannings, it's so awful. I'm glad Meg was trying to save her sisters.
  • Kendall's broke. "So what am I supposed to do?" "I don't know. What'd you do before?"
  • "No, Gia, Chlamydia is not a flower." // "Well, we have it on like a trellis at our beach house." // "Your trellis is a whore." // "You're very funny, Veronica. Really, you should know that about yourself." // "Thank you, Gia." // "I used to be funny at my old school. People here don't get me."
  • omg Krysten Ritter is adorable. "You should come look at my clothes!" so excited. so unlike Jessica Jones
  • So my mom definitely made printout sheets of instructions for babysitting her kids, but they weren't scarily tightly scheduled nonsense. They were just tips like "no swiss cheese" and "don't worry about the mess" (that last one came up a lot)
  • Look at Veronica, hanging up on Duncan to talk to Logan, look at that
  • And Logan sees the picture of the "witness," Dr. Tom Griffith and realizes it's not the guy who was there.
  • Gross and then the dad propositions Veronica casually and hands her a drawing Edwin made of her decapitated self
  • Aw, V's writing regular emails to Wallace. I'm glad she's continuing to reach out to him, even if he's not replying. She's reminding him that she's there.
  • Ew now I'm picturing Ms. Hauser hooking up with Sheriff Lamb
  • oh damn it's Mama Casablancas
  • and she refuses to take her kids
  • wow just all the moms on this show are terrifying and awful
  • as is Ms. Hauser's kid, oy
  • ahahahaha I forgot she's gonna hook up with Deputy Sacks. Better than Lamb
  • Dr. Griffith seems not shitty ... so far. But then why did he lie about Logan? (jk I remember)
  • "Great, they kill their guests and steal their shoes ... please tell me they kill their guests."
  • lol Veronica's hell is a girl's night. at least one that includes Madison Sinclair
  • ew I just remembered what Kendall does next (after trying to proposition Duncan) ... or rather whom she does next ... ew
  • The lesson we're learning today, kids, is that every single family in Neptune is dysfunctional. Except Veronica and Keith Mars
  • "When you leave a sleepover early, I'm supposed to put a trench coat over my pajamas and come pick you up."
  • GASP! the cigar shop that V followed Dr. Griffith to deals drugs and other shady activities.
  • Duncan's black turtleneck makes him look like Andrew Wells


  • awww #tbt to the hiding of things in air vents
  • And Veronica figures it out. It's the Mannings.
  • God, there are so many notebooks filled with this. [I know right? - Prop Master]
  • And Grace is locked behind a hidden panel in the closet. This is so beyond fucked up.
  • We're approaching one of Lamb's few redeeming moments: he listens to Veronica, goes back into the Manning house, finds the secret panel, and calls Stewart Manning out. I'm disappointed that the only reason is he'd been abused too "It's funny, I heard my own father give that exact speech once."
  • And then he lets Veronica and Duncan go.
  • Actually wait a goshdurned minute. He lets V and D go, but does he actually take Mr. Manning in? Do we rescue Grace or not? WE NEED TO FUCKING RESCUE GRACE.
  • I hate this.


Lynda's Thoughts:

  • And we open with Duncan being very unimpressed with Veronica’s Big Lebowski impression and lack of making out.  I think.  It’s hard to tell.
  • Enter Logan riding in on a wave of uncomfortable.  This must be such a weird situation to be in and I don‘t know many adults that could handle it, never mind three teenagers.  I mean, clearly Logan's not but they're all trying!
  • Just as I’m feeling bad for Logan despite or because of the bravado we see his actual heartbreak shine through for a brief moment and my feeling bad turns to wanting to make him hot chocolate and give him a big hug.
  • And then Cordelia Casablancas comes in so never mind I take it all back.  Ickiness.
  • Right, now we’re in sex-ed class and OH GIA HONEY NO.


  • “Mr Casablancas breathing down her neck”.  EW so hard I need a shower.  Not sure this is intentional but most things are on this show and either way just EW.
  • UH OH where is Duncan??
  • Poor Keith listening to Woody’s spiel.  He looks as pained as I feel.  Just wait, Keith.  You don’t realise just how bad this is going to get.
  • And we’re back at school and what’s this?  Veronica is being summoned to HER office – makes a change from Mr. Clemmons’ I guess?  (Clemmons’s?  Clemmonseses) [Clemoni? - Z]
  • Ahh bittersweet with the LoVe memories.  Stop making me feel for you Logan!
  • Can I just say.  Veronica Mars and Buffy Summers.  HAIR QUEENS.


  • Oh wow, that look when Duncan sees Logan follow V out of the bathroom.  Yeah you better look, Duncan.
  • Okay this whole babysitting thing is giving me flashbacks to high school.  Some of the kids I looked after were amazing.  The others… probably belong in this episode.  Major props to Veronica for her commitment to the case!
  • Wow.  Rich boy Duncan talking down to Veronica about working makes me want to punch him.  (I mean, it’s possible he was supposed to be playing it sarcastic but we’ll never know.  Or be able to tell).  V has her own caseload, works for Keith and is one of the top students in her entire school so shut your stupid immovable face.
  • Dick is now creeping on Kendall and GROSS.  You can totally see why he’s not bothered when he finds out about Logan and Kendall later.  Also, you have no idea how many times I had to scribble out Cordy and replace it with Kendall while writing this.
  • Oh but her face when she realises she gets nothing makes it all worth it!
  • Aaaand we’re back to sex-ed and oooh, a little chlamydia foreshadowing!
  • Okay so now we're at the first babysitting job with Psycho Mum #1 and first up is Edwin of the Corn.  Logan swings by for a little detecting and we find out he lied about the night of the murder.  Shocker.
  • Oof.  Awkward-in-hindsight talk between V and Duncan about babies and Meg.
  • And Edwin of the Corn’s dad wants to smoke a j and oh hahaha here’s the picture my psychotic monster drew for you.
  • Wallace, Wallace, Wallace.  Girl, SAME.  I hate episodes without Wallace.
  • Okay V’s move with the bachelor auction leading straight into the babysitting flyer was so smooth and brilliant.
  • Why is Cord Kendall just hanging around in lingerie and heels?  Is this normal?  Is this how Lynn used to dress?
  • Even though I know what’s to come I really feel for Cassidy here more than the usual Dick Snr douche-moments.  I know the pain of understanding one of your parents doesn’t want you but two?  I don’t even have the words to describe the physical pain Cassidy talking to his mum makes me feel.
  • Now we’re babysitting again and here’s PM#2.  Seriously, that screaming kid is almost giving me PTSD.
  • And Deputy Sacks takes one for the team!
  • We're back on Logan's case and as with most awful people on this show Dr Tom is a terrible human being with a good side and tries to talk V out of plastic surgery.  DON’T WORRY I STILL DISLIKE YOU.
  • Oooh an inspirational voicemail!
  • Girl’s night is on, ninja turtle sleeping bag and all.  BUT WAIT IT’S A TRICK.  Surprise Veronica, it’s a slumber party with people you don’t like.  So painful.
  • And we’re back to Kendall hunting for her new bank account.  This scene could have been so much better with someone equal to Jason Dohring’s skills.  CC ruins so many good lines with her dreadful delivery.  Don't get me wrong, most of the time she is Cordelia perfection but... well... she's really only a little better than Alyson Hannigan.


  • Oh hello Mrs. Goodman AKA PM#3.  Even the way she walks gives me the heebie jeebies!  Honestly, this woman is a freaking robot.
  • Aww Keith talking about picking Veronica up from sleepovers gives me the fuzzies.  One of their cute father-daughter moments I love!
  • And Keith knows all about the shady cigar shop and we find out what the good doctor is really up to.
  • Duncan and Veronica finally find the hidden book and realise she spent a week in a special hell dimension for no reason because GASP it’s actually Meg’s sister!
  • Duncan also finds the secret letter which is about to blow his entire life up in slow motion.  I hate how much they use Veronica's distrust of Logan to break them up but she constantly lets Duncan's deceptions slide and often they are FAR worse than Logan's.  
  • And they finally find Grace hidden away behind her stacks of books.
  • Sherriff Lamb ignoring Veronica’s pleas and taking them both away in handcuffs is so well played that no matter how many times I’ve seen this episode (I’m guessing four or five times) I always forget he comes back and I get so angry at him.
  • So we finally see a side of Lamb we never thought we’d see and once again they make us feel bad for a not-complete-jerk-after-all.
  • With the acting and the music and just… this whole thing.  The end to this episode just gives me chills every time.  Perfection.

Favorite Lines:
Lynda: "I'm sorry, did that hurt your feeling?" - Logan
Daniel: "Hey, are you sick, or am I gonna see you singing "Twist and Shout" on a parade float?" - Veronica
Zelda: "Your trellis is a whore." - Veronica

Arc/Continuity:

Neptune Roll Call: Duncan, Logan, Dick, Beaver (Absent: Wallace, Weevil, Jackie)
First Appearance: Deborah Hauser, Rodney Goodman, Mrs. Goodman
Recurring: Kendall Casablancas, Mr. Pope, Gia Goodman, Woody Goodman, Veronica's "Office," Barry Randall, Jane Kuhne, Dr. Tom Griffith, Madison Sinclair, Grace Manning, Stewart Manning, Sheriff Don Lamb, Rose Manning, Jessica Fuller
Logan's Inspirational Message: "Life's tragedy is that we get old too soon and and wise too late." - Ben Franklin
Veronica's Alias: a version of Veronica that wants plastic surgery
Logan's Nicknames: Bessie (Kendall)

Stats:
Dead Humans - 0
Backup Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 1 (his commando t-shirt)
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0