PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

REVIEW ARCHIVES

Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Hurricane Buffy

Episode 1.08: I Will Remember You. Original Airdate: 11/23/99





“Angel must make a difficult decision regarding Buffy when a demon’s blood makes him mortal once more.”






Previously on Buffy: 

Zelda’s Thoughts:

  • Did everyone bring tissues?
  • Can you lend them to Buffy?
  • We start, thematically, with Angel winding his old-fashioned desk clock.
  • And then seeing that his desk isn’t level. And tinkering.
  • And Cordelia is fixated that he isn’t broody enough.
  • Angel pulls out a stake and they think he’s suicidal and the joke is he wants it to level his desk and like THAT IS A DUMB WAY TO LEVEL A DESK. Just fold up some cardstock, my dude.
  • “But she’s human, and I’m not, and that’s also never going to change.” SO MUCH POINTED DIALOGUE.
  • Oops Buffy walked in on the perfect entrance line. “If my ex came to town and was all stalking me in the shadows and then left and then didn’t even say hello? I’d be – ” // “A little upset. Wouldn’t you?”
  • In this episode we will ignore the burgeoning Riley relationship in Sunnydale. It’s easy enough to do.
  • Apparently she’s actually in town to see deadbeat dad (believable with the recent Thanksgiving holiday, I guess) … and thought she’d stop by. So that’s fun.
  • Running gag of “it’s kind of a long story—rapid accurate summary—maybe not that long” – missed that from our Buffy days
  • “Given enough time, we should be able to— ” // “Forget?” // “Yeah.” Oh the lines that will have such STING when we hear them again.
  • Angel does a cool dive between Buffy and the demon to do a cool stabby.
  • “It was rude. We should go kill it.” “I’m free.”
  • BUFFY ASKS OFF CAMERA IF THERE’S SOMEWHERE SHE CAN CHANGE to cover the fact that her costume changes between scenes and that’d be fine except why did she want to change into a white sweater to go exploring through the sewers why why why. She also let her hair down? It was tied up a bit and now it’s fully down, which is great for absorbing sewer smells and combat fun. Fine I’ll call a shenanigan on her judgement.
  • Also a callback to a Buffy feelings babble, as she did in the episode “Angel” on her own show.
  • “Oh boy, I was really jonesing for another heartbreaking sewer talk.” Oh man the ow of it. I forgot that that’s when he ended it with her in  BtVS S3.
  • And what’s this? Angel’s blood mixes with the demon’s blood and his face fills with angelic light (sorry) and his heart, it beats! 

  • Angel walks into the office, and Doyle looks at him steadily because he can tell. Angel’s alive.
  • This is the second time in eight episodes the show’s decided to throw David into all the sunlight because of the plot of the week.
  • So this dude was the Mohra demon. A wee bit similar in name to the gem of Amara.
  • Oh man, there’s something rather sweet in Angel staring at his reflection.

  • Time to go visit the Oracles! Beautiful makeup, kind of useless, and don’t they eventually get murdered?
  • Angel’s offering to the Oracles is … his wristwatch. But they dig it. “I  like time. There is so little and so much of it.” Very Lewis Carroll.
  • And they confirm he’s mortal “That which we serve is no longer that which you serve. You are released from your fealty.” Which … doesn’t quite make sense to me. A vampire, even one with a soul, isn’t built to serve the whatever, like the Slayer is. It’s a choice, and one a mortal can choose. Look at Willow and Xander and Giles. Look at Anya, once she’s human. Look at Cordelia and Gunn and Wesley and Fred. I could go on but you get my shenanigan on this rationale.
  • Anyway, the big ol’ Bangel kiss in the sun is happening, and it’s soaring romantic music.
  • Cordelia laments that the plant is completely dead, and I can confirm it’s not the one Melissa gave Angel a few episodes ago. Aren’t you glad I’m here?
  • ALSO THE PLANT IS DEAD. BECAUSE THIS IS ALL THE DOING OF THE FIRST. REMEMBER THE CHRISTMAS TREES.
  • So for all that The First never had a good plan, it’s clear that a big part of that plan is to strip away the Slayer’s supernatural support—taking Angel out, manipulating Spike, executing the Potentials, etc. So this tracks. And I remember being really excited the first time experiencing this episode, realizing what the dead plant meant.
  • And after Buffy and Angel’s serious talk about why they shouldn’t jump into anything now that he’s human, and we’re sad and awkward, then the sexytimes begin, with an abandon they probably never had, if we’re being honest. Since their first time was tentative and tender.
  • Okay, this time Angel is responsible for the peanut butter in the bed OH MY GOD WHAT IF HE TIME TRAVELED A LITTLE BIT TOO ACTIVELY AND DID GET PEANUT BUTTER IN THE BED DURING RM W/A VU AND BLAMED IT ON CORDELIA HEADCANON ACCEPTED.
  • Man, if this were my ship, I’d be completely melting at how adorable and schmoopy and happy they are, and even with it not being my ship, it’s so lovely and rare to see the two of them so happy, so hopeful.
  • Buffy, cuddled into Angel’s chest, relishing the sound of his beating heart. “We’ll make it work, right?” // “We will.”
  • “I wanna stay awake so this day can keep happening.”
  • “This is the first time I ever really felt this way.” // “What way?” // “Just like I’ve always wanted to. Like a normal girl falling asleep in the arm of her normal boyfriend. It’s perfect.”
  • And now we begin the Angel Is Dumb portion of the episode, as he elects to not wake Buffy for the Let’s Kill the Mohra Demon Again adventure.
  • Because the larger problem is this failed fight confirms for him that he can’t effectively fight for the forces of good as a mere human, and if you’ll refer to my list above, you’ll see that I consider that a faulty premise.
  • But so with that dumb premise and the equally dumb not-bringing-Buffy, he syllogizes his way to undo the day, to regain his vampire self. It’s his body, his choice, and I respect (but, like Director Fury, I think it’s a stupid-ass decision). 

  • And I can’t tell what’s the more cruel: to make the decision without Buffy, or to tell Buffy the decision when it’s too late for her to do anything about it but ache in a way she hasn’t ached since, well, the last time he broke her heart.
  • And see? This is why I think his premise is faulty. He was still able to help. He figured out what thousand eyes meant, and knew to tell Buffy to smash the jewel in the Mohra Demon’s forehead, to truly destroy him in a non-regenerative way.
  • But back at the Oracles he is, this time with a fancy old vase.
  • He’s scared by the prophecy, that the End of Days are coming (spoiler: not for another three seasons), and that Buffy will die (spoiler the second: that’s before the End of Days). But Angel, did you not see how many apocali Buffy faced on her own show? Check our stats.
  • I know he has to do it for the show to be what it is, but I’m still mad at Angel for hurting Buffy.
  • Angel alone will carry the memory, the Oracles say. And what’s worse, to know or to not know? Better to have loved and lost? He gets to keep the memory of those perfect happy hopefully hours with Buffy, but he also keeps the memory of breaking her heart again, of watching her crumble and his own heart breaks on its last few beats.
  • Sarah is fucking killing it in this scene.
  • And the Buffy Angel love theme plays as her face crumples, as he holds her close, her eyes overflowing. Her voice so small as she asks “When?”
  • “Everything we did.” // “It never happened.” // “It did. It did. I know it did. I felt your heart beat.”
  • “It’s not enough time. I’ll never forget. I’ll never forget. I’ll never forget.”
  • And we’re back to the scene where Buffy arrived, and the demon arrives, the demon dispatched without fanfare. And Buffy leaves. And Angel is alone, his broken desk clock shattered on the floor.


Daniel’s Thoughts:

  • Ok, so this episode takes place after the episode where Angel goes back to Sunnydale.  And he’s back in LA. 
  • IT’S BUFFY IT’S BUFFY.  BUFFY IS HERE. 
  • And Buffy’s reunion with Cordy is short.  She needs some time alone with Angel. 
  • She’s pissed that he went back to Sunnydale to rescue her but didn’t even say hello. 
  • Oh no! A demon smashed through the window causing so much sunlight to flood the room.  Don't worry, Angel’s fine. 
  • They stab the demon and there’s this cool glowing green blood. 
  • Oh man, Buffy’s getting all emotional & there is banter. And it’s like the team’s back together again. 
  • Oh man, that struggle between desire and unhealthy consequences of a relationship.  I know that beat. 
  • Ouch! Angel’s hand got sliced by the demon sword and it looks kinda painful. 
  • More of that glowy demon blood.  This time it’s seeping into that cut.  And his heart beats! 
  • There’s dust on the floor and Cordelia thinks it’s Angel for a second and it’s hilarious. 
Angel?


  • Wow, that fridge is filled for people who don’t look like they eat. 
  • First appearance of the oracles.  Their presence will never make sense to me.  
  • I mean, what are these people? And who are the powers that be? 
  • “You can go do whatever you want”, says Doyle.  So Angel goes and kisses Buffy outside. 
  • Groiny” – Cordelia’s euphemism for sex. I love it.  
  • I mean, it’s a perfect plot for Buffy’s crossover.  This. Could Change Things. Forever. 
  • And they’re not getting “Groiny” – just in case, I guess.  Oh, no, there it is.    Don’t forget, Angel, you can get her pregnant now. 
  • Peanut butter in bed.  Nice throwback to when Cordelia slept there. 
  • OOPS HE GOT ICE CREAM ON HIS NAKED CHEST. GUESS BUFFY WILL HAVE TO GET THAT.  Oh, bother. 
  • Nope.  I was just about to ask if Doyle will stop having visions….but nope.  He has a vision of a Mohra demon. 
  • Doyle wants to bring Buffy because as of now, she’s the strongest of all of them. (I mean, she was before, too- but now she’s the only one with real supernatural strength.) 
  • Angel’s bleeding like a real boy.
  • The thousand eyes has to do with the jewel sticking out of his forehead.  It’s smashed by Buffy & and dies for real. 
  • Angel wants to reverse what happened to him so that he can protect Buffy forever. 
  • But…it’ll also erase the entire day which will suck.  Buffy won’t remember anything but he will. 
  • Oh it’s all so sad and epic.  And I had more empathy for all of this when I believed love was a thing.  OOPS, TMI? 
  • 24 hours earlier.  The demon attacks again but Angel knows how to kill it.   It’s…right there in the forehead…Angel hitting it with a hard object kills it.  That’s a design flaw, right there.  



Crossfire!
Buffy: When you’re around, whether I see you or not, I feel you … inside.
Z: Dirty.

Cordelia, holding up an axe: Is this antique?
Buffy: Byzantine.
Z: I love that she knows that.
D, smiling proudly: That’s Giles.

Favorite Lines:
Zelda: “I felt your heart beat.” – Buffy. Sarah just destroys me in this scene.
Daniel: "Groiny." - Cordelia

Arc/Continuity:
First Appearance: Buffy Summers, The Oracles
Buffy Crossover: Buffy Summers

Stats:
Cordelia’s Hair – half up with flyaways, mostly straight
Dead Humans – 0
Dead Undeads – 1 (Mohra demon died twice, we’re counting only once)
AlternaDead Humans – 2 (since they’re undone)
AlternaDead Undeads – 1
Dead Flashbacks – 0
Dead Lawyers – 0
Doyle Has a Vision – 1
Lawyered Ex Machina – 0
Evil Reveal – 0
Unevil Reveal – 0
Shenanigans Called – 2
Apocalypse Called – 1
Prophecy Called – 0

Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Badly Dressed Superhero



Episode 1.07: The Bachelor Party. Original Airdate: 11/16/99


“Doyle receives a surprise visit from his wife, who wishes to end their marriage so that she may wed a demon.”











Daniel’s Thoughts:

  • Hey, it’s Cordelia’s first date on the show. And he’s kind of a hottie, in a Dawson's Creek CW kinda way.
  • Angel’s being all dad-like is cute.
  • Oh hey, it’s a picture of Buffy!
Not at all a professional headshot.

  • Vision! Vampire nest. Angel & Doyle are on the job.
  • Of course Cordelia’s hottie date is boring AF.
  • Punk vamps!!
  • Haha, Cordelia bites a vampire. And her boring hottie date runs off.
  • “Now I expect a guy to be rich and interesting – and it’s your fault!”
  • Cordelia calls Doyle a fixer-upper. Cause…he’s totally TV ugly I guess? Blah.
  • Ooh, Doyle has a surprise wife!
  • And it doesn’t faze Angel at all.
  • So Doyle’s wife has a new friend. He mistakes Angel for Doyle which isn’t as funny as the writers think it is. Again with Doyle not being as good looking as Angel which isn’t just subjective. Glenn Quinn is pretty. That’s just a fact.
  • So Doyle is mixed and his demon side didn’t present until he was 21. Which is pretty interesting.
  • This is the second time Carlos Jacott plays someone who appears human who turns out to be a demon. He played a similar role in the Buffy episode: "Anne".
  • “Ethno-demonologist.” That’s a thing!
  • “The Ritual Eating of the First husband’s brains” – it’s interesting they had that on the list despite all being surprised that Doyle was even invited. SHENANIGANS.
  • More surprising Doyle facts: He used to teach third grade.
  • Why are Richard’s brothers beating up Angel?
  • They’re all like, thanks for your sacrifice and Doyle consented but he totally didn’t. It is not informed consent.
  • I dunno. This whole thing seems forced. Richard says they haven’t performed this in a hundred years. And they’re supposed to be a peaceful demon sect. Then why would they consider doing this at all? And if it’s all innocent, why didn’t he tell his wife?
  • Harry’s the only one who makes sense: They don’t do the old rituals because they’re barbaric – but this is the most barbaric of all – killing another human be-demon. [Am now picturing human-bee-demons. Thank you for those nightmares. - Z]
  • “Who wants a wife whose knees only bend the one way.”
  • Vision: Buffy!

Zelda’s Thoughts:

  • Come on, Doyle. Anyone who watched Buffy knows that Angel likes to brood with a book, not go to a sports bar.
  • Cordelia’s going on a date with … some dude named Pierce, and the golddigger look isn’t great on her. (though her dress looks great)
  • I really do love the credits theme for this show.
  • Oooh this vamp nest is full of punk rock vamps with brightly dyed hair. They seem fun. I mean evil.
  • Wow, when the vamp grabs Cordelia, Pierce goes RUNNING.
  • And then, in a callback to, I wanna say “Prophecy Girl,” Cordelia bites the vamp.
  • And yay, Doyle to the rescue! Thanks Doyle!
  • “You’re so brave.” // “You think you could say that without so much shock in your voice?”
  • Aw, and Cordelia’s touched that he asked if she was okay immediately after. “That’s like, substance, right?”
  • Callback to dating Xander the fixer-upper.
  • And in a beautiful undermining of his heroism, Doyle is reliving it, all bravado and new bad puns.
  • And this is when we find out that Doyle’s first name is Francis. Well, his second name. Allen Francis Doyle. Also that he has a wife named Harry.
  • So many emotions playing across his face, such good work from Glenn Quinn.
  • I know Harry’s fiancĂ© is named Richard, but I’m going to struggle so much to not call him Ken because … IT’S KEN FROM BUFFY.
  • Really, though, Harry should have come to Doyle to finalize the divorce more than a few days in advance of the wedding.
  • “Can I get a side of bland with that bland?” It’s true, Carlos Jacott is really good at serving up smiling bland (WITH EVIL UNDERNEATH)
  • I know Daniel already went into this, but I’ll second the ridiculousness of acting like Glenn Quinn isn’t attractive. They may dress him tackily, but he has a pretty pretty face with soulful expressions. He’s just shorter than David. They’re both pretty men. And he’s certainly prettier than Ken, not that we should actually dive into the value of physical beauty as any kind of moral or character value.
  • GASP Ken’s a demon. Honestly, why did Joss cast him as the same guy three times? Seeming fuddy duddy who’s actually a baddie? (we haven’t learned he’s a baddie yet, not all demons are baddies in this universe, but I’m looking ahead)
As Richard, Ken, and Dobson. Basically NEVER trust this face.

  • Oh wow, Harry’s an ethnodemonologist? What university offers degrees in that? Does she work with the Initiative?
  • And oh man, she wanted Doyle to accept his demon half. That wasn’t why they broke up. Or it was, but it was his inability to handle it, not hers. “Harry didn’t leave because of the demon in me. She left because of me.” And he signs the divorce papers.
  • Angel’s office has a copier? That’s not cheap!
  • Man, I hope he has insurance on the place for when it goes boom at the end of the season.
  • Ken to his family about Doyle: “He’s really very sweet. I think you’re all going to enjoy him.”
  • GASP they plan to eat Doyle’s brains GASP
  • Told you Ken was evil.
  • Cordelia’s blown away by what she learns of Doyle’s past, including the fact that he used to be a third grade teacher, and volunteered at the food bank. It is interesting to see how much has changed, how much he’s been damaged by his own self-loathing once he learned he was part-demon.
  • Also the show is working overtime to get Cordelia emotionally invested in Doyle in time to write him off. They probably intended a slower burn on all this.
  • We really should track the number of times Angel defenestrates. It’s happened twice this episode. The opening credits include a shot of a beautiful slow motion swan dive defenestration.
  • Wow, They moved quickly from Doyle giving his consent to INTO THE MAGIC BOX WITH YOU.
  • That needle BARELY touched him. How is that sufficient anesthesia?


  • Aaaaand they’re putting on lobster bibs.
  • And back at the bachelorette party, “Well they’re certainly not going to eat your ex-husband’s brains … For instance.” A+ delivery.
  • BLAM Angel busts open the pretty double doors, and that’s an iconic credits shot if ever there was one.


  • “You brought a vampire to my brother’s bachelor party?”
  • I wonder if Doyle’s face spines are spiky or squishy.
  • Aw man, Cordelia in defense of Doyle, unknowingly smashes up demon-faced Doyle, and Angel rushes to stop her because oops.
  • Harry’s more mad that Ken was going to start their marriage with deceit, rather than starting their marriage WITH MURDER AND BRAIN EATING.
  • Okay, she seems upset about both parts.
  • “Nice guys don’t always finish last.” // “You think I’m a nice guy?” // “I think it, I say it. It’s my way.” Iconic Cordelia moment.
  • GASP Doyle had a vision of Buffy in a fight! Luckily he saw her photo earlier so he knows who it is.
  • Ah, right, after this episode Angel runs off to snoop on Buffy’s Thanksgiving plans.


Crossfire!

Ken to his family about Doyle: “He’s really very sweet. I think you’re all going to enjoy him.”
D & Z:  *share a knowing look*


Favorite Lines:



Daniel: “I think it. I say it. It's my way.” – Cordelia
Zelda: “Well they’re certainly not going to eat your ex-husband’s brains … For instance.” – Aunt Martha







Arc/Continuity:

Generally Known TV Face: Kristin Dattilo, Carlos Jacott, Chris Tallman, Lauri Johnson
Whedonverse Hat Trick: Carlos Jacott (Richard Straley here, Ken in Buffy ep “Anne”; Lawrence Dobson in Firefly ep “Serenity”)
Buffy crossover: a black and white photo of Buffy tucked into Angel’s book


Stats:

Cordelia’s Hair – half-up in a clip, wavy curls
Dead Humans – 0
Dead Undeads – 2
Dead Flashbacks – 0
Dead Lawyers – 0
Doyle Has a Vision – 2
Lawyered Ex Machina – 0
Evil Reveal – 1 (Ken and his family want to eat Doyle’s brains)
Unevil Reveal – 0
Shenanigans Called – 1
Apocalypse Called – 0
Prophecy Called – 0

Tuesday, December 3, 2019

You Could Be a Rainbow and Not a Painbow

Episode 1.06: Sense and Sensitivity. Original Airdate: 11/09/99


“An imprisoned criminal uses his connections to target Kate for elimination.” [This is possibly the worst imdb plot description we’ve run into]



Zelda’s Thoughts:

  • Go Kate go! You chase down that criminal!
  • Dang, she kicked him in the spine.
  • And now she’s bantering Buffy-style about having difficulty expressing her emotions because also we’re setting up the theme for the episode.
  • Kate’s boss says that Little Tony (aka human big bad of the week) is gone, and he doesn’t know who can find him. Kate’s eyes say that she does.
  • Cut to Angel slicing up some gross demony thing and leaving Cordelia and Doyle to do the janitorial dismemberment of the remains.
  • Meanwhile, Cordy has dramatic irony on her side, bitcaing about Angel ignoring the people around him while she ignores Doyle getting throttled by a tentacle. Don’t worry, guys, he’ll be fine until spoiler.
  • This is a Tim Minear ep? But … he doesn’t kill any regulars in it.
  • Aw fuck, it’s Kate’s dad. He’s the fucking worst and I hate him.
  • It doesn’t help that the actor doesn’t bring a lot to the role.
  • Angel tracks down Little Tony and tells Kate, but it looks like he’s about to skip. So Angel breaks out your favorite gag and mine: Angel the doof in a Hawaiian shirt and straw hat. 

  • “That’s not the boat to Catalina? Are you sure?”
  • Oops Angel punchy kicky.
  • But Kate’s there before it gets worse.
  • Little Tony, now in captivity, proceeds to patronize and sexually harass Kate. How fun.
  • HEY IT’S LEE MERCER HI LEE MERCER.
  • Lee Mercer of Wolfram & Hart got a fax from Little Tony about taking out Kate.
  • Angel drinks a lot more coffee now that he’s a detective. Didn’t he say on Buffy that coffee makes him jittery?
  • Kate’s dad paid for her drink, and then pulls a full neg, sounding impressed before he says “Here’s hoping the bust doesn’t fall apart before you finish filing the paperwork,” to make sure she doesn’t feel good about herself for too long.
  • Papa Lockley “In my day, we didn’t need any damn sensitivity.” Kate’s face: I NOTICED DAD.
  • But yeah his whole vibe is proto are-you-triggered-snowflake, which probably explains why WE HATE HIM.
  • Kids, what’s the real lesson we learned from today? Don’t hold a magical talking stick or it’ll cause chaos in law enforcement.
  • I mean yeah this sensitivity counselor is evil, but it’s also true that Kate’s got a lot of defensive shells up because of how shitty her dad is.
  • Aw, Kate lowkey asks Angel out. But also oops she’s already under the influence of the magic stick with “He’s really acting out, isn’t he? … I’m just saying that he must be in some kind of pain to strike out at others in that way.”
  • Gasp! W&H got the sensitivity counselor into the precinct, and his office is full of MYSTICAL THINGS OF MAGIC THAT GLOW.
  • HEYO Kate just admitted to picturing Angel in his underwear.
  • Kate’s father continues to be The Worst.
  • And poor Kate, the only woman in the room, the only one not in a collared shirt, and under the influence of the magic stick, gives an emotional toast to her awful father at his retirement party. “After mom died, you stopped, you know. It was like you couldn’t stand the sight of me … But big girls don’t cry, right? … You couldn’t even tell a scared little girl a beautiful lie.”
  • And all the other cops are talking their feelings. But see the problem is, a lot of cop feelings seem to be … anger. And the only way they know to express that anger is in violence. So, fighty cry fight.
  • Kate, to Angel: “I see such an old soul.” Doyle: “He gets that a lot.”
  • Welp, Kate outs Doyle’s crush on Cordelia.
  • Don’t worry, the hijinks music tells us that Kate’s state should be read as a funny thing, and not deeply worrying.
  • Angel’s feeling punky. When Sensitivity Alan asks what his parents were like, he says “My parents were great. Tasted a lot like chicken.”
  • Meanwhile, one of the cops has decided it’s not right to imprison criminals, so he unlocks all the cells. This’ll be fun. And they all jump the cop.
  • Question: is there a large presence of the Italian mafia in  LA? Am I stereotyping for assuming they’re more east coast based?
  • Oops, Angel got whacked with the emostick and now he’s hugging Cordoyle. You don’t have to worry about that ship name for long, folks. 


  • “There’s a stick that talks?” “Cordelia, do you have any idea just how precious you are?”
  • “You both withdraw when I go vamp, I feel you judge me.” Snerk. He’s fun like this.
  • Cop reads a poem about his bad feels to a prisoner: “I saw a leaf and I did cry.” That is … not a good poem.
  • It’s too bad the idea of cops regretting violence is played for laughs, especially in LA.
  • Nice to see that even when they’re in touch with their emotions, Angel and Kate are both still good at the fighting. And then they hug it out.
  • Welp, W&H cuts ties with Little Tony after he went gun-happy in the precinct. But they’re also watching the cctv footage of Angel and helllllo new person crushing on Angel.
  • Hey, Kate’s dad comes in to confront Kate about last night. And he advocates “it didn’t happen” and shut down those emotions and I hate him I hate him I hate him.
  • I wonder what would have happened if Kate had been on the show longer than she is. Like, would they have gone there with an attempted relationship with Angel? Or was the plan always to introduce Darla to fuck things up?
  • Um, spoilers?

Daniel’s Thoughts:

  • Guy running in the mean, lonely streets of LA. Detective Kate follows in hot pursuit. Kicks ass, but takes no names.
  • Kate’s a hardball, no nonsense cop. Apparently she’s been in the interrogation room for hours. Her male co-workers don’t seem to appreciate her…
  • Meanwhile Angel is killing a big lizard octopus monster. Cordelia & Doyle are left to clean up the mess.
  • “JarJar is getting his own talk show…” What?
  • “It’s like you don’t have a pulse.” “I don’t.”
  • Kate has a dad. And this is where alllll her insecurities come from.
  • Yeah, he’s a bit of a bastard.
  • Angel found the mob guy for Kate. He wasn’t going to intervene…but
  • Where did Angel even get this outfit?
  • Angel says he got out of the car because the guy was getting away but… I mean he wasn’t? The cops got their in time before the boat even got to shore.
  • I love these little Wolfram & Hart interjections… They’re the big bad but we don’t really know that yet.
  • Kate’s Dad “In my day, we didn’t need any sensitivity.”  Me:



  • Doyle “They got a thug discount rate?” Yeah Doyle, just insult the guy who is openly giving you information.
  • Kate’s being all sensitive. What a change of character. I wonder if there’s a supernatural explanation…DUN DUN DUN
  • And Kate’s dad continues to act like a prick at his retirement party.
  • Kate gets all deep in her speech. This might be the spell talking but there’s definitely truth in it.
  • All these tough cop guys are throwing out therapy terms and crying and I guess it’s supposed to be funny.
  • Rohm’s doing some great work in this episode, though – the range of emotions.
  • “My parents were great. Tastes a lot like chicken.” Wow, Angel. Is murdering your parents really something you want to joke about?
  • I mean….what’s the message of this episode? If cops are more sensitive, things would be chaos? So they should continue to be hard-nosed brutal assholes?
  • Cordelia does that Grr thing again and it’s pretty cute.
  • Heh, everyone’s all embarrassed now that the spell wore off.
  • Everyone’s back to their closed off selves now. So, Ok. We've learned nothing.
  • And nothing’s changed with Kate’s dad. Still a bastard.


Favorite Lines:
Zelda: “You both withdraw when I go vamp, I feel you judge me.” – Angel
Daniel“It’s like you don’t have a pulse.” “I don’t.” -Cordelia/Angel

Arc/Continuity:
First Appearance: Trevor Lockley, Lee Mercer
Recurring: Detective Kate Lockley
Generally Known TV Face: Alex Skuby, Steve Schirripa
Whedonverse Hat Trick: Alex Skuby (Harlan here; Vincent in Buffy ep “Bad Girls”), Kevin Will (Heath here; Officer in Firefly ep “The Train Job”; Gerry in Dollhouse ep “Gray Hour”)
Angel’s Alias: Herb Saunders

Stats:
Cordelia’s Hair – loose tumbling curls
Dead Humans – 1
Dead Undeads – 1
Dead Flashbacks – 0
Dead Lawyers – 0
Doyle Has a Vision – 0
Lawyered Ex Machina – 1
Evil Reveal – 1
Unevil Reveal – 0
Shenanigans Called – 0
Apocalypse Called – 0
Prophecy Called – 0

Wednesday, November 27, 2019

Violets and Aspercreme


Episode 1.05: Rm w/a Vu. Original Airdate: 11/02/99



“Cordelia falls in love with a rent-controlled apartment that turns out to be haunted, and a demon comes to collect on Doyle’s loans.”









Daniel’s Thoughts:

  • Aww bad Cordelia acting.  
  • Angel’s voicemail has “we help the hopeless” 
  • Cordy not wanting to socialize with her old friends because she doesn’t want to talk about her life – relatable. 
  • Angel knows a lot about Cordelia back in HS.  They didn’t hang out that much. 
  • Aww, Cordelia’s phonebook.  I used to have something similar, ya know, before smartphones. 
  • Oh man, Doyle is referencing that ‘priceless’ ad which if it were out today would have been such a social media meme. 
  • Cordelia needs to run from her apartment. Doyle needs to run from his.  Angel is naked.  Priceless. 
  • “Do you have mousse?  Of course you do.” – Cordelia.  Do people still mousse??  I moussed once upon a time which is weird since my hair is already very big. 
  • Angel, close your damn robe 
  • I love when Angel is persnickety. “And the reason there is a wet towel on my leather chair?”  He’s so the Monica of this show.  Cordelia’s Rachel.  Doyle’s definitely Ross. [I'm Phoebe! - Lorne]
  • I love Cordelia’s scorched diploma and the reason we all know behind it. 
  • Cordelia, apartment shopping: The apartments here are just as bad NYC hunting. Maybe worse.  More cults. 
  • Cordelia wants to take out a wall.  Um, you have to own the place to do that.  You can’t just take down a wall when you’re renting.  I mean, I know this is foreshadowing but still. 
  • Oooh, spooky wall.  Very Nightmare on Elm Street.


  • Ok, so Cordy’s apartment is haunted. And whomever is haunting her is a perv going through her bras and stuff. 
  • Doyle always seems uplit. 
  • I don’t think Doyle’s crush on Cordelia is charming at all.  So far, it really only seems to be looks based. 
  • Mirror scare!  Beth Grant. Zelda, “She’s in everything.” Yeah. 
  • SHENANIGANS: HOW DID HE GET THERE
So. Much. Sun.

  • She’s currently hiding the ghost and I’m not sure why. I know she wants them to think she’s doing ok, but this is what the team does.  They can get rid of ghosts. 
  • Angel doesn’t know where to get all the ingredients for a spell. Um, just ask Anya and Giles.  But also, there’re no magic shop in LA?   
  • Oh wow, the ghost is impersonating Angel’s voice.  How odd.  Well I guess Beetlejuice could do it.  But like, she can use the phone, too? 
  • Hey, detective Kate!  Oh man, Kate’s got it bad….she gets all weird when Angel leans over her. 
  • But at least they figure out what happened sorta.  Or at least they know about Dennis…they just don’t exactly what happened. 
  • Real poltergeist action now, things blowing all over the place. 
  • Uh oh.  It’s so inconvenient when you’re trying to get out of a haunted apartment and demon mobsters are after you. 
  • “You stupid little bitch.”  “I’m a bitch…”  I love that this is what motivates her.  YES, I’m bitch. So screw you.  
  • “Cry-Buffy!” 
  • Uh oh, Cordy is possessed. 
  • She Cask of Amontillado’d her son.  Wow, what a whack job. 
  • So the demons who were sent after Doyle are dead…I’m sure there will be others. 
  • Cordy’s apartment is really nice.  She’s pretty lucky….I mean, despite almost dying for it. 
  • We looked up the name Aura, the girl from Sunnydale who calls Cordelia. Turns out Aura was in the first episode of Buffy.  She’s the girl who found the dead guy in her locker – and we never hear from her again.  It’s interesting that this is who Jane Espensen decided to bring back…even as a voice over.  IMDB doesn’t have the name of the actress playing the voiceover in this episode.


 Zelda’s Thoughts:

  • I remember Jane Espenson (this episode’s writer) saying that writers got a bonus if they create a recurring character, when that character repeats. She created Phantom Dennis, but since his subsequent appearances are, you know, blinvisible ones, it doesn’t count for her. WELL, IT COUNTS FOR US, JANE.
  • Doyle is very sweet and agreeable in the face of Cordelia so far not being a very good actor … and also not being a very good Angel Investigations employee, as the ringing phone goes to the answering machine REMEMBER ANSWERING MACHINES.
  • Apparently it was someone named Aura. Did we ever meet an Aura? (Yes, she had the extreme dead guy stuffed in her locker in the pilot)
  • Angel explains the Cordettes at Sunnydale High, and I’d raise an eyebrow but he knew about the dance that one time because he lurks, so I’ll allow it.
  • Anyway, Cordelia’s apartment spews brown water and dim lighting and the door sticks and HEY A ROACH ON THE TV and jesus christ so many on the carpet time to burn the place to the ground.
  • Gasp! A random demon in Doyle’s apartment! With pretty smooth skin and stylish horns.

  • Ah, this is the one collecting on Doyle’s loans that the imdb summary foretold.
  • Angel listens to Ode to Joy in the shower. 'kay.
  • Man, season one really leans into Angel, wet and shirtless. Not that we’re complaining. 


  • Cordelia thinks roaches have antlers.
  • I’m really glad I’m watching this episode after I no longer live in an apartment building with a roach problem.
  • Cordelia tells Angel once she gets a new place he’s “completely invited over,” and thanks for that little line plant.
  • I like the touch of Cordelia checking her reflection in the kettle because he has no mirrors … though don’t most bathrooms come with a mirror?
  • Doyle is quietly freaking out because he walked into Angel’s basement apartment and Cordelia’s in a robe, she got peanut butter in the bed, and Angel’s wearing boxers and a fairly porny red robe.
  • Doyle refers to Angel’s overhanging forehead, and Angel self-consciously touches his brow, and I laugh forever.
  • Wow, Cordelia is scraping up Angel’s linoleum tile, and putting her high school trophies on his mantle.
  • Aw, nice touch, her high school diploma is a bit scorchy.
  • Heh, Angel lied to Doyle that there’s a big guy to see him so he can make him come clean about what or whom he’s hiding from.
  • “It’s a system of checks and balances.” // “And some of your checks didn’t balance.”
  • Angel offers a quid pro quo: Angel helps Doyle with his debt, Doyle helps Angel with his Cordelia roommate.
  • Sounds fair to me.
  • Wow, one of the places she looks at is basically a cult, how fun.
  • Ugh, creepo super hitting on Cordelia gross gross gross.
  • Question: when you apartment hunt, are all the places pre-furnished? The only time I’ve seen furnished places was when I was looking to purchase; all the rentals were empty. But the ones Cordelia looks at have furniture. And dang, does the actual pretty apartment she chooses have good furnishings.
  • “First thing: hire someone to take out that wall.” Cordelia, that wall has a face inside it and does not want to be removed. Just … fair warning.
  • It’s nice to see how happy she is, though. It’s a nice color on her, the bouncy planning joy.
  • I don’t get the demon referring to Angel the vampire helping some demon half-breed … vampires are half-breeds too, aren’t they? That’s certainly the ethos in the upcoming Hero ep. And according to Anya, the only real demons are giant Mayor Snakes.
  • Wow, Cordelia was able to move in right away? Jealous.
  • Except for the ghosts messing with her drawers and radio. Less jealous of that.
  • Also hey remember radios?
  • Oooh nice touch with the boiling glass of water.
  • “I’m from Sunnydale, you’re not scaring me, you know!” Aw but she is scared. Poor Cordy.
  • And with morning, the bed crashes back down to the floor. Yay?
  • Hey, Beth Grant is our ghost! She’s in all the things! Sometimes she doubts our commitment to Sparkle Motion.
Told ya.

  • “You know what, I get it. You're a ghost. You're dead. Big accomplishment! Move on! You see a light anywhere, go towards it, okay?”
  • Angel brought Cordelia the tiniest cactus as a housewarming.


  • Aw, Cordelia’s in denial about her haunted home. But the wall is bleeding the word die. “I am not giving up this apartment.” // “It’s haunted.” // “It’s rent controlled!”
  • Aw, Angel tells her it’s just a place and she’s more than that and she says “how, how am I more than that?”
  • Oh man, she sees it as a punishment for how she was kind of a bitca in high school, and the idea of the nice apartment as some kind of reward and end of punishment.
  • OH RIGHT I FORGOT. Ghost Mom pretended to be Angel to lure Cordelia back to the apartment. Sneaky sneaky!
  • AND DAVID BOREANAZ AND HIS VOICE WERE COMPLICIT.
  • “Too bad you wouldn’t leave my son alone.” And it actually reads two ways. One, she’s displacing her rage against her son’s fiancee onto Cordelia, but also if Cordelia takes out that wall, she’ll find Dennis’s corpse.
  • Thanks for the backstory help, Detective Kate! Your hair looks great.
  • And Angel’s hunch pays off, there’s a history of suicides in the apartment.
  • And don’t think we didn’t see that TENSION as Angel leaned over Kate’s shoulder.
  • “Angel Investigations. We Hope You’re Helpless.” Oh Doyle. Oh Doyle Doyle Doyle.
  • Woof, she’s got a cord around Cordelia’s neck and she’s slowly asphyxiating. But at least Angel and Doyle are here in time!
  • Oh man, poor Cordelia’s so scared and shattered. Charisma’s doing great work this episode.
  • Heh, in all the chaos a book absolutely knocks Angel on the head but he shakes it off. I wonder if that was supposed to happen.
  • Oh, in perfect timing, collector demon came back with two friends, one of whom looks human. Mama Ghost is mad but demon says “Ignore her, it's just a ghost.”
  • And she’s so annoyed they broke one of the tiles on the fireplace.
  • Season One isn’t the strongest, but this is a pretty great episode, and this chaos exorcism slash battle is awesome.
  • And then this wonderful moment, when the ghost calls Cordelia a bitch, and Cordelia remembers, “I am a bitch. I’m not a sniveling whiny little cry-Buffy. I’m the nastiest girl in Sunnydale history. I take crap from no one.”
  • Eesh, Cordelia’s line about the ghost being translucent, when she’s super not tells me that they waaaaaaaaaaaanted her to be more see-through and didn’t have the budget for it. Which explains the makeup, which here looks caked on but would probably look better under a translucent filter.
  • Wow, it’s really damn cold, that Mama Ghost Amontilladoed her own son so he wouldn’t get married. (I know Daniel already made this joke above, but I love the fact that we both verbed the title of that story that I'M KEEPING IT).
  • Cordelia’s apartment has a big round arching window, and aw Buffy design flashbacks.
  • Heh, now that Dennis was freed from the wall, he’s having fun being a pranky roomie to Cordelia.

Crossfire!
Cordelia: How come Patrick Swayze is never dead when you need him?

D & Z: *clutch their hearts in dismay*


Favorite Lines:
Daniel: Do you have mousse? Of course you do. - Cordelia
Zelda: I'm a bitch ... I'm not a sniveling whiny little cry-Buffy. I'm the nastiest girl in Sunnydale history. I take crap from no one. - Cordelia

Arc/Continuity:
First Appearance: Phantom Dennis
Recurring: Detective Kate Lockley, We Help the Hopeless
Generally Known TV Face: Beth Grant
Buffy Crossover: Aura (uncredited: voice only)


Stats:
Cordelia’s Hair – blown straight, and tangled by ghosties
Dead Humans – 0
Dead Undeads – 3
Dead Flashbacks – 2
Dead Lawyers – 0
Doyle Has a Vision – 0
Lawyered Ex Machina – 0
Evil Reveal – 0
Unevil Reveal – 1 (Dennis didn't kill his mom)
Shenanigans Called – 1
Apocalypse Called – 0
Prophecy Called – 0