PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

REVIEW ARCHIVES

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Yeah, You’re Basically the Lorax

Episode 4.05: Losing Streak. Original Airdate 7.19.19

"Veronica discovers Keith has been hiding something scary from her. The real reason for Penn’s latest theory on the bomber comes to light. Veronica loses confidence in new friend, Nicole, owner of Comrade Quacks.”




Zelda's Thoughts:

  • LOL V and Keith staging a conversation in front of Pizza Patton’s bug.
  • Aw damn, I was hoping they’d stage a fake theory for him. Instead they just mocked him and smushed it.
  • Oh look another gasbag man shouting his mouth off.
  • Langdon dresses him down wonderfully though, pointing out his son was a serial roofier and that he himself is being investigated for tax fraud.
  • And then he goes out to the press pool in front of the station and runs his dumbass mouth off. And he’s offering a massive reward for finding the bomber, but … is it US currency or currency for his stupid island? Because I’m gonna guess that money is worth … paper?
  • HI BABY NOAH FENNEL
Two episodes is fine. We have our happy family.

  • HI BEST FRIEND NICOLE, HERE TO RESCUE VERONICA from boring-ass guests at Wallace’s housewarming.
  • Where’s Logan, though? I thought he was meeting us here.
  • And they are vaping. So many new sides to Veronica now we’re on Hulu.
  • I’m glad Veronica has finally agreed with me that Nicole is our new best friend.
  • Are you fucking kidding me, part of Nicole’s backstory is that she was raped. Darling TV writers, that’s not like REQUIRED for female character development. I know that it’s a part of reality, and that women of color are also frequent victims, I’m just. I’m tired. I love Nicole and I hate that this happened to her. I also don’t think it’s necessary to have been assaulted in order to be a good defender against assaulters of other women in her own bar.
  • Keith’s jumped up excitedly because the fact that Nicole was raped fits into a pattern—each bomb killed a sex offender.
  • I don’t want our best friend Nicole to be the bomber. It’s still too early in the season, and she’s our best friend.
  • Weevil’s come a-calling at Mars Investigations. “What’s wrong with you, Veronica?” // “You know, there are a range of opinions.”
  • Oh, V’s done with Weevil because he took a settlement rather than letting Keith and Cliff go after the Sheriff’s department on his behalf.
  • And my question about Jade (Weevil’s wife) is answered: she left town with their kid.
  • This is fucking heartbreaking. I miss their friendship. They’re both so angry and hurt.
  • I don’t remember if this stuff with Weevil was covered in the books or not. I guess I should reread them.
  • Crap, did Keith’s forgetfulness cause a fire? V needs to stop being callous, this is a real problem.
  • Cliff has a dog! “You named your dog The Missus.” // “Says the owner of a dog named Pony.”
  • So the letter from “the bomber” challenged the Mayor to walk around fully naked? I guess it’s not as bad as that Black Mirror episode.
  • Alonzo: “To normal” *toasts his latte* *Naked Mayor and his naked entourage run by*
"To Normal"
  • Juan Diego confirming that JK is doing business with Weevil. Shit.
  • I think V’s right that Clyde is organizing a lot of the mayhem in town. But I think the bomber has to be someone we haven’t thought of yet. In season one, it was someone never suspected but a walking red flag in plain sight. In season two, plain sight but not enough information for us to figure it out on our own. In season three (arc one), he was early accused then seemingly alibied out. There are a lot of ways to play this, to hide the killer.
  • But really we need to pay attention to the fact that Keith is having memory problems and it’s fucking scary. It’s a liability to his work and his safety, but it’s also one of the scariest things to happen, to lose your memory.
  • Damn, Keith wants to shut down Mars Investigations entirely, not just retire from his desk.
  • Vinnie’s going through the bar lost and found box looking for the Maloof ring, which is … not the dumbest plan actually.
  • FUCK another bomb, this one in Nicole’s bar. Fuck fuck fuck.
  • Who’s dead this time?
  • Oh wow, none dead this time. A mercy.
  • Criminy, JK Simmons put a dead bird in Pizza Patton’s bed. That’s … well, it’s no horse head.
  • Matty is definitely a kid detective in the making.
  • Oh wow, Phoenix Land Trust aka Beaver’s shell corporation is buying up properties.
  • And Nicole already sold her bar after the first bombing and didn’t tell us.
  • I don’t want her to be the bomber. I don’t think she is.
  • But just in case, V is bugging our best friend Nicole’s office.


Daniel's Thoughts:
  • The Mars’ play with Patton Oswalt a bit before they smash the bug.
  • Logan is jealous of Leo – and there’s the Logan we know.
  • “Another ding on therapy: it’s like Jazz.”
  • Bryce’s dad is as much of an asshole as his headless son.  He berates the police chief.
  • And police chief Langdon says Bryce was an asshole – and it’s awesome.  She also puts this guy in his place.

The face you make when the police chief basically calls your decapitated son an asshole.

  • In turn, he talks to the press.  He’s putting up $250,000 to find his son’s killer.
  • Wallace & Shae’s housewarming. Veronica is having a terrible time with these people but thankfully Kirby shows up.
  • Eww, Veronica and Kirby are vaping.  STOP IT.  It is pot, so I might be ok with it.
  • Kirby is surprised that Veronica has a gun.  Veronica is surprised that Kirby has a driver.
  • Oh wow.  Who knew Veronica would be so 2nd amendment.  She takes Kirby shooting.  I guess she needs it in her line of work.  Poor Wallace gets left high and dry though.
  • So two guys who tried to roofie girls in Kirby’s club were killed the next day in bomb blasts.  Is she a suspect now?
  • And now Keith is floating a similar theory.   Perry Walsh is also another victim that was a sexual predator.
  • They’re bringing it all up too early, which means that she’s probably innocent.
  • Weevil’s back. They vehemently disagree on life.  And it’s really sad.  They never really agreed with each other on how to handle things but they used to respect each other.  It kinda sucks.
  • You know, for a private investigator, Veronica is really slow on the uptake that Keith is losing his memory.  She’s just about to say something, though, when Matty arrives.
  • Matty can get Veronica a hacker.
  • There’s a bus with Wallace and Matty on it and I got scared for a second – considering the history of this show – but I quickly dismissed that. This scene is to get Matty to convince hacker guy to help.
  • Cliff!  He’s defending a prostitute who gives free sex to vets.  Good for her.
  • So Veronica is finally noticing the memory issues and she’s grilling Cliff about it for some reason.
  • So Weevil’s working with JK Simmons.
  • And JK is hunting/bonding with Keith.
  • Veronica’s putting it all together.  JK is running something – and it even includes what happened at Hu’s grocery store.
  • But she’s more concerned right now about Keith’s memory issues.
  • Both men in Veronica’s life think she’s not doing what she wants but I disagree.  She’s not in Neptune because of her connections.  She’s there to be a PI.  She enjoys her job and she’s good at it. And the fact that two important people in her life are there, too, is a huge plus.
  • Another KABOOM.  This time in Kirby’s club.  I think that lets her off the hook.
I have nothing to say about this.  It's just a neat shot.  Kudos to the stuntwoman



  • Vinnie’s still alive.  So…good? Yeah, it’s good.  He’s an ass, but we like Vinnie.  We like to hate Vinnie. [True facts. - Z]
  • Oh damn, Someone (JK Simmons) put a dead bird in Patton Oswalt’s bed.
  • Wow Matty figured out where Veronica lives with All The Clues. She’s such a little Veronica.
  • Kirby may not be innocent after all. She sold her bar after the first bombing.  So of course, Veronica bugs her office.

Favorite Lines:
Zelda: “Cuss a duck.” - Veronica
Daniel: “What’s wrong with you, Veronica?” // “You know, there are a range of opinions.”  Weevil/Veronica

Arc/Continuity:
Recurring: Weevil, Alonzo Lozano, Wallace, Dodie Mendoza, Nicole Malloy, Police Chief Marcia Langdon, Penn Epner, Matty Ross, Alex Maloof, Clyde Pickett, Vinnie Van Lowe, Cliff McCormack, Don, Juan Diego, Carol, Angie, Mayor Mark Dobbins, Herc, Councilwoman Teresa Visinare, Bob Sargent, Shae Fennel, Noah Fennel, Phoenix Land Trust
Generally Known TV Face: Mather Zickel, Rachel Andersen

Stats:
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Ducks - several
Pony Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0

Tuesday, August 20, 2019

Huh. You ARE in the FBI.


Episode 4.04: Heads You Lose. Original Airdate 7.19.19.
 
“Convinced the bomber is still at large, Veronica visits Chino to learn more about Clyde and Big Dick. Mayor Dobbins’ request for help from the FBI brings an old flame to Neptune. Veronica confronts her mugger.”

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Ok, so no one lost a head in the last episode but this title is making me nervous.
  • Hey it’s the girl from Modern Family.  Dick is flirting with her.
  • And he’s wearing those roller sneakers. 
  • Veronica reveals one person died in the bombing with Logan & Kirby.
  • And Kirby throws someone else out for roofing girls.
  • Meanwhile, Congressman Maloof is regretting asking Alonzo to kill those two guys.  We still don’t know if they’re dead.
  • Keith and Veronica visit the Maloofs.  They’re continuing to work for them. Momma Maloof still wants them to find the stupid ring.
  • And the Police Chief thinks moleman planted the second bomb before he died.
  • Veronica visits Tim Foyle in prison.  And I totally didn’t recognize him.  He looks very different.

  • She’s trying to find a connection between Moleman, JK Simmons and Dick Sr.
  • And now: Mercer Hayes.  Again, never would have recognized him.  But then again, I didn’t recognize him in the regular series too.
  • So Veronica learns about JK Simmons being Dick’s Sr’s “protector”.
  • Their new theory – Motel Dad was an organizer.  Spring break was too big of a draw for local owners to sell.  So…the bomb causes people not to show up, thus losing business and Dick Sr. being able to buy up the boardwalk.
  • That asshole from earlier, Bryce – wakes up on the beach with a bomb wrapped around his neck.  And that is some SAW level shit right there.  The beeping gets louder and louder until it goes off.  And we see him standing there….without his head.
Heads He Lost?

  • The FBI is now getting involved.  Because see Saw-Level-Shit.
  • OMG LEO D’AMATO IS AN FBI AGENT! DEPUTY LEO IS NOW AGENT LEO.
  • The chief mentions private investigators on the case – Leo knows immediately that it’s Veronica.
  • He visits and brings a pizza. I forgot their history at first and thought it had something to do with the pizzaguy – but he brought a pizza because she used to bring him one.  It’s weird that Logan and Leo have never met.
  • Veronica goes to visit the mad pooper.
  • Alonzo watches from the sidelines as he attacks her and she attacks back.  But Weevil stops it all.   She’s a little disappointed that Weevil is back in the game.  But alas, her white privilege is showing.
  • “I think Piz is back there somewhere.”  What about Duncan?  Everyone forgets about Duncan.
  • Aww Leo’s divorced.
  • The murderheads are back.
  • They’re getting some information from Matty about what the Mars’ have been up to.
  • So turns out the that the woman JK Simmons wants to find stole almost 400,000 dollars from him.  ….Yet still wants to meet with him.
  • Pizza keeps getting mentioned in this episode and it makes me want a pizza really bad.
  • Vinnie!  Momma Maloof hired him to find the ring.  Enough with the ring! UNLESS the ring is the real motive and they keep hinting at it.
  • Veronica and Leo are eating Chinese, which makes no sense.  They should be eating pizza.  But I guess they’ve had enough of pizza.
  • Veronica and Leo go to the hardware store and see JK Simmons buying nails used in the bombing.  But then they follow him to Mars Investigations.
  • So Congressman Maloof feels all guilty about the hit he put on those two guys so he tries to call it off and it’s too late.
  • Leo’s appearing more than he usually appears in an episode.  I hope it’s not his only one.  They’re still waiting outside Mars Investigations.
  • They use this time to catch up.
  • And meanwhile, Keith and JK Simmons are drinking and bonding.
  • Veronica and Keith talk all 20s film noir and it’s priceless.
  • Hey, Max is here – Mac’s ex.  He looks exactly the same.
  • “How High Are You?” – The name of a dispensary that Max owns.  Worthy pun of The Good Place.
  • First twist: Patton Oswalt bugged the Mars’ office.
  • Second twist: one of the guys that Maloof wanted killed is alive!
Zelda’s Thoughts:

  • Daniel, after the previous episode ends, “Okay, so no one lost a head.” Both of us: *see the title for this episode* Welp.
  • Oh, I had missed that the guy who said “No to NUTTs” to Veronica at the town hall meeting was Motel Dad. Dang, it definitely would point toward V’s conspiracy theory, and also makes him a more likely target.
  • Who is Bryce, and does he just exist to show us Dick has slightly improved since early days.
  • Dick: “I got it.” V: “Chlamydia?” I do love her
  • We’re not counting the two Carr brothers as dead yet, since that scene of them getting shot was the Congressman’s nightmare. At least he’s feeling guilt? But also ugh.
  • Wow, Langdon has decided to claim Walsh planted the second bomb before he died. I'm sure that'll fly.
  • So um. Has no one asked the Congressman why he’s all injured and bloody and bruised? No one?
  • Wow this Chattanooga Charlie guy is a Walking Southern Cliché with his lines. Full On Folksy Slang and a peanut butter drawl. It’s actually pissing me off.
  • Oh damn, we're visiting Tim Foyle in prison.
  • Wow a completely different vibe than his TA days. I actually don’t believe the actor is even trying to play the same character. He just happens to look a bit like Tim.
  • “Well, if you must know.” // “I must, I must.” Is that a running gag this season?
  • Oh damn. Mercer Hayes.
  • Well he's exACTly the same.
  • Who else we gonna visit on our prison day?
  • Oh shit, Bryce wakes up on the beach with a bomb strapped to his neck what the fuck.
  • Rules out Langdon’s theory of Walsh, even though we knew that was bullshit anyway; this was clearly strapped on after Walsh blew up.
  • The fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
  • THIS SEASON IS SUPER DARK Y’ALL.
  • The FBI is here now. LEO IS THE FBI. LEO IS AN AGENT NOW. WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN. HI LEO.
  • Was he inspired after he found out V wasn’t in the FBI?
  • Awwww he brought her pizza.
  • Man the giant grin that stays frozen and polite when Logan answer the door.
  • Max is real good at that smile, but boy oh boy is this awkward and awkward.
  • V pays a visit to Juan Diego her mugger aka the serial shitter.
  • What the actual fuck, all these guys jumping Veronica, what the total fuck I hate this.
  • Weevil puts a stop to this, but how often does this happen without him stopping it just because she’s his friend.
  • I wonder if he and his wife are still together.
  • “Hi Leo.” // “I think Piz is back there too, somewhere.”
  • Okay but what if Duncan strolled in and then we all accidentally fell asleep.
  • Leo got married … and divorced.
  • Man, a lot happened between the film and now.
  • Oh right, she was reconsidering Leo as a romantic option in one of the books. I’d forgotten. I should maybe reread those.
  • Oh my friend Kelly loves Harlots. Nice in-Hulu commercial, I guess?.
  • Ooops, Patton got his Murderhead friends mad at him for namedropping the name of the group on TV.
  • Eep, Matty is sharing her knowledge that V went to Chino with the Murderheads
  • Called it! JK’s ex that he was looking for, ran off with his ill-gotten gains. No wonder he’s looking for her.
  • Hmm but apparently she does want to see Clyde again.
  • There’s just. There’s so much pizza this season. So much pizza. How hungry were the writers?
  • Fuck, Keith forgot Maloof’s name, right in front of him. My heart is breaking.
  • Oh what the hell, mama Maloof hired Vinnie to find the missing ring.
  • I did say I’d rather have Vinnie than the Fitzpatricks
  • Man though I just wanna throw my water in his face. Repeatedly.
  • And now the Congressman is asking Vinnie to look for the cartel men. How many levels is he playing?
  • This season is keeping a lot of plates spinning, and so far they’re not dropping them (though I’d like more time with our best friend Nicole and her sap gloves). There’s a LOT going on, and continuously. Not even like S1, with the one long arc and the mysteries of the week.
  • This Leo banter is just weird. And actually I think Leo’s earlier scene with Logan was supposed to be funny, and it wasn’t. It was just weird. And both actors are good, so there’s gotta be something off in the writing. The jokes aren’t quite funny but they also don’t feel in character really.
  • Oh damn, not only did they kill the two Carr boys, they filmed it and said “this is for the Congressman.” That’s now two incriminating vids.
  • SERIOUSLY THE BODYCOUNT THIS SEASON. WE’RE ONLY HALFWAY THROUGH.
  • So we’ve now had Keith and Leo both give V a bit of a heart to heart about Logan’s proposal being worth attention, and I know we had Wallace earlier. They’re not wrong, but damn she should probably talk to that therapist.
This is a car, not a therapy.

  • And once JK leaves, Keith’s drunkypants act wears off, and OMG I LOVE THE DATED BANTER OF THE MARSES.
  • Oh damn, Max is back! Random sighting. Will he come in handy? Besides being another merchant owner on the boardwalk?
  • Welp, Pizza Patton has blown the conspiracy whistle of V’s quiet theory that Big Dick is behind everything. Because he bugged their office (which I wondered if he might, when he stopped by) and cribbed their theory.
  • HOLY SHIT one of the Carrs isn’t dead after all. Gotta change our stats

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: "I think Piz is back there too. Somewhere." - Logan
Zelda: V: "What the hell is goin' on here? Two old boozehounds deep in the giggle juice, bumpin' gums?"" Keith: "I was doin' my job. And what's with the fake-aloo? Our mark's no Jasper." V: "We tailed our meat from the hardware store. Coulda been the same kind of nails used as shrapnel in the bombs." K: "But you came up dusty." V: "I'm no bunny. I knew it was a long shot." Leo: "Okay, I think I know how you turned out like you did."


Arc/Continuity:

First Appearance: Chattanooga Charlie, Booker Woods, Councilwoman Teresa Visinare
Recurring: Weevil, Alonzo Lozano, Dodie Mendoza, Leo D'Amato, Daniel Maloof, Dick Casablancas, Nicole Malloy, Police Chief Marcia Langdon, Penn Epner, Richard Casablancas, Matty Ross, Amalia Maloof, Alex Maloof, Clyde Pickett, Vinnie Van Lowe, Don, Mercer Hayes, Tim Foyle, Juan Diego, Tayler Carr, Tyler Carr, Carol, Claudia, Max, Angie, Mayor Mark Dobbins, Herc, Bob Sargent
Already Famous Person: Sarah Hyland
Logan's Inspirational Message: "The life of the creative man is led, directed, and controlled by boredom." - Susan Sontag


Stats:

Dead Humans - 3
Pony Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Bryce’s Single Entendre - “A little two-on-you action”
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0

Tuesday, August 13, 2019

JonBenet Ramsey Was Killed By An Owl

Episode 4.03: Keep Calm and Party On. Original Airdate 7.19.19.

“Veronica and Keith’s client, Daniel Maloof, makes a shocking confession. [Chief of Police] Langdon closes in on her top suspect. Veronica and Matty join forces, just as the whole investigation is flipped on its head.”



Zelda's Thoughts:

  • V is jogging at night and the schmuckbait is too strong for me here.
  • Yep and someone is here to mug her. “You don’t have to say bitch. You can be a scary PCHer and respect women.”
  • And she tases him and takes a photo “for the ‘gram.” And then she asks for his wallet. “Go on. Git! This is my alone time.”
  • Uh so apparently this mugging cold open, with Juan Diego’s wallet of six crisp hundred dollar bills “inspires a conspiracy theory that was going to change [V’s] life.” Really?
  • Pizza Patton and Matty are trading theories: Mole Man or Congressman Maloof
  • Welp, two fans of Patton show up and it turns out they love him because he’s coming after a Muslim politician so racism sure is fun. At least he blinks at that.
  • Wow, apparently someone’s been blackmailing Maloof for the past year, and forcing his hand on certain votes, using a compromising video. His theory is that the bomb was a warning for him not to resign from politics.
  • Sidenote: I see that Kristen Bell is skilled in TV character eating: tiny tiny bites: 


  • The Mayor looks pretty blustery and useless so far.
  • “I’m sorry, who are you?” “How much time do you have? Cuz I've been thinking about this a lot lately.”
  • Dammit, we got our hopes up that V’s promise to have someone trace the blackmailer would be Mac … but she’s in Istanbul. For reasons.
  • “If you must know—” (Logan, from off camera behind the door) “Oh, she must.”
  • Logan's so much graver this season, but I do like when they remember how skilled he is at the banter.
  • “I assume that any text that starts with ‘bring me pants’ is from Dick.”
  • Oooh we’re at the Duck bar. Where’s our best friend Nicole?
  • I’ll say this for S4, there’s a lot more shirtless men than women
  • LOOK IT’S OUR BEST FRIEND NICOLE
  • Wait why are we partying? I thought we were here for surveillance tapes. I’m so confused.
  • Wowww V is pukey hungover.
  • At least she got to bond and dance with our best friend Nicole 


  • Veronica wants a sap glove for Christmas. I guess she doesn’t need a pony anymore.
  • “He's convinced JonBenet Ramsey was killed by an owl.” Guys, I think I understood that reference!
  • Ewwww someone was shitting in the ice machines at the Sea Sprite.
  • And they’re sitting stakeout.
  • Mole Man’s license plate is 4VA G00. FOREVAH GOOOOOOOOO


  • This is my new thing I’m going to say over and over and over.
  • And Keith, through some sneaky phone work, finds the name of Mole Man: Perry Walsh. And when he looks him up: “Sweet Jesus.”
  • And he brings it to Chief of Police Langdon: Perry Walsh has a history with pipe bombs.
  • And while she’s not brushing him off the way the incompetent and corrupt Lambs would, she is brushing him off … but only until he’s out of sight – then she sends a SWAT team to Mole Man’s home.
  • Murderheads Meeting … this is fun
  • Wow, to his face, Patton is trying to tell Logan that Aaron may not have killed Lilly.
  • And now V knows that Gabriel is the nephew of cartel man.
  • Oops, Congressman is out of his nicotine gum. And Logan is offsite. I’m so scared he’s about to lose his head.
  • I just started screaming oh shit over and over because I thought our cartel friends were gonna behead the Congressman but instead he’s been abducted by the Carr brothers. Fucking hell.
  • It’s really just … so beyond anything that they’re doing all this shit to a sitting politician, for the sake of a ring.
  • Alonzo rescues him from the Carrs, cuts him down … what comes next?
  • I wonder if it’ll turn out that anything Pizza Patton is blathering about is right.
  • Oh damn, Perry “Mole Man” Walsh blew himself up with the cops closed in on him.
  • The body count is pretty high this season.
  • Aw man. They are gonna kill the Congressman. Aw man.
  • Logan’ll be out of a job. As will the Marses.
  • Wow, saved by the radio, which is reporting that Perry Walsh is the bomber. “Seems like we should still kill this asshole.”
  • Welp, Maloof's higher ground is lost, as he asks Alonzo to kill the two Carr brothers.
  • Keith and Logan both shocked and appalled that V didn’t bother to tell them about the attempted mugging. Apparently our man Juan Diego is also the phantom shitter.


  • Welp, and Langdon claims “diligent policework,” rather than giving credit to the Marses for tracking down Walsh.
  • He served seven years in Chino. V: “Cuss me running.” She’s finding a big ol’ conspiracy connection among Big Dick, Clyde, the Fitzpatricks, Walsh, and her mugger Juan Diego, all to clear out Spring Break partiers from Neptune. She did warn us of the conspiracy theory.
  • GUYS, KEITH STILL HAS THE THIS IS YOUR GOD POSTER IN HIS OFFICE I DIE
  • “You and I have a history of tilting at windmills.” I’m scared. Keith is warning her off it and he might be right, but the whole season has been warning us that worse is to come.
  • Another pill sequence for Keith, and now he’s going to the fancy doc that JK Simmons recommended.
  • WEEVIL IS BACK. GOD BLESS US EVERYONE.
  • ALSO HECTOR IS HERE REMEMBER HIM. 
You may remember him from such films as Scenes With Weevil.


  • Oh damn, Alonzo has been brought to meet Weevil.
  • So we're here to cheer Logan on at the volleyball tourney, but why isn’t Veronica sitting next to her best friend Wallace or our best friend Nicole? Why are they both perched behind her like sidekicks? (I know the answer is framing, but eff it) 


  • Oh. Fuck. Another bomb.
  • Veronica’s the only one not running away. She’s walking slowly toward it.
  
Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Veronica jogs.  That’s new.   It’s like 5 in the morning
  • And some PCHer tries to mug her.  But first she tries to talk him out of it.  And then she uses her taser.  It’s awesome.

Does this face look worried?


  • And then she takes his wallet.  But it’s something about the $100 bills she finds that sparks something.
  • If we have a PCHer, does that mean we’ll see Weevil soon?
  • The Cartel guys: Alonzo and Dodie.  Alonzo throws out the hotel bible. True story: I have a friend who takes bibles out of his hotel rooms and puts them outside the door.
  • Matty is visiting Patton Oswalt.  He’s still on his theory but Matty has her doubts.
  • He brings up Lilly Kane…which probably happened before Matty was born. GOD WE’RE OLD.  He briefly explains what happened in season 1.
  • He’s got fans.  He’s getting interviewed.  He’s enjoying his 15 minutes.
  • Logan’s started his job as security.  He greets the Mars’.  I like them working as a team.  All three of them now.
  • It is true that they tried to pay off Tawny.  It doesn’t change the Mars’ working for him.
  • Turns out Congressman Maloof is also being blackmailed for a….solo…sex tape.
  • Wow, Veronica’s kinda bitter. “Nothing matters.”
  • Veronica says she can find someone who can help find the blackmailer.  Is it Mac??
  • Keith asks if it’s who he thinks it is but neither he nor Veronica share a name with us.  IS IT MAC?
  • “Who are you?” “How much time do you have because  I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately.”
  • It's not Mac. Apparently Mac is in Istanbul. But that's all we get on that.
  • She asks Logan for help.  Also Logan speaks a little Arabic so he can understand when the Maloof’s speak Arabic to avoid Logan listening in.  Ooh, that’s great.
  • Kristen Bell and Patton Oswald have great rapport.
  • Man, I would hate to live in Neptune during spring break. It’s constant noise and GET OFF MY LAWN.
  • Is Dick a stripper now, what?   

I'll allow it.

  • Shots time!  Holy crap, Veronica gets druuuunk.  And it’s awesome.  She requests No Scrubs from the DJ and they play it. 
  • She regrets it the next day when she vomits it all up.  Amateur.
Just take some ibuprofen, bacon egg & cheese wrap and down some water.

  • Meanwhile. Keith found the rat guy.
  • Matty shows up at the Marses.   She tells them about her Fitzpatrick theory.
  • So Veronica & Matty go sit in a car waiting for the guy to show up.
  • Matty brings up Lilly.  Veronica admits she’s still angry about it.
  • Keith gets into Veronica mode and uses some aliases.
  • Police chief Dawnn Lewis doesn’t seem to want Keith’s help – but once he’s gone, she at least takes his warnings seriously.
  • Veronica and Logan go to meet Patton Oswalt for his “Murderhead” club.
  • The Murderheads have some wild theories but at least they can help V with certain facts. One: That Gabriel’s a relative of El Despiadado.
  • Zelda and I have a theory that one person is going to lose their head an episode.  We’re two for two and now we’re worried about the congressman.
  • So the congressman goes outside where Dodie and Alozno are waiting.  He gets kidnapped, but it’s not our cartel friends – it’s Tawny’s relatives still looking for that damn ring.
  • Alonzo and Dodie save him….but for what?
  • The Murderheads are all talking about Lilly and it’s getting tiresome.  For both me and Veronica.
  • So Perry, the moleman is dead in an apparent bombing suicide.  We’re only on episode three so that’s a bunch of hooey.
  • Congressman Maloof thanks Alonzo at first but then realizes they’re going to kill him.  I mean, I’d have hope – but they killed some innocent robotics college student, so.
  • I’ll say one thing – Logan and Veronica at least have a healthy sex life.
  • “This guy mugged me a while ago.” Logan & Keith: “What??”
  • I’m not sure about this new chief.  She seems competent but she still doesn’t give Keith and Veronica credit for their help in the investigation.
  • Veronica puts together that a lot of people involved were in the same prison.
  • Keith decides to take JK Simmons’ case.
  • So Wallace is more than just a HS Coach – he’s a Physics teacher as well.  In fact, he’s Matty’s teacher.  We learn that by hearsay – we don’t actually see Wallace.
  • Veronica and Keith debate dropping the case as solved.  They decide to – but then Veronica admits to the Maloofs that she doesn’t think they have the right guy.  And yes, we’re in episode 3 so I agree with Veronica.
  • Wow, Keith takes JK Simmons up on his offer.  He gets this amazing treatment – unlike when he was doing PT with Corny.
  • Weeviiiiilllll.  He looks good.  He meets Alonzo.
  • Dick seems to be making a living being a host at spring break stuff.
  • Dick and Logan are playing a couple of professional Volleyball players.  
*cute Top Gun music*

  • Veronica & Wallace & Kirby are there watching.
  • ANOTHER KABOOM.

Crossfire!

Murderhead: It means 'the ruthless,' I looked it up.
D, outraged: IT MEANS MERCILESS. GOOGLE TRANSLATE SAYS SO.






Veronica: Why do I always have to be right?
Daniel: Well not always. We have stats, girl.


Favorite Lines:

Zelda: "Cuss me running." - Veronica
Daniel: "Who are you?” “How much time do you have because  I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately.” - Langdon and Logan

Arc/Continuity:
First Appearance: Don, Juan Diego, Carol, Claudia, Angie, Tim Davids (Reporter), Herc, Manager Kelly
Recurring:  THIS IS YOUR GOD poster in Keith’s office, Weevil, Alonzo Lozano, Wallace Fennel, Dodie Mendoza, Daniel Maloof, Dick Casablancas, Nicole Malloy, Chief of Police Marcia Langdon, Penn Epner, Matty Ross, Amalia Maloof, Alex Maloof, Clyde Pickett, Tayler Carr, Tyler Carr, Perry "Mole Man" Walsh, Mayor Mark Dobbins, Bob Sargent, Hector
Generally Known TV Face: Clark Duke, Tyler Alvarez, Dannah Phirman
Zelda's Childhood Returning: Reporter #2 is played by Venus DeMilo Thomas  who played Telly on Salute Your Shorts
Logan's Inspirational Message: “Einstein said you cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for death. No, wait. That was war.”
Keith’s Alias: two phone scams

Stats:
Dead Humans – 2
Pony Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 1
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Logan Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 1
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0