PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Thursday, June 14, 2012

You guys, I just ... hate you guys.

Don't drink and slay, kids.
Episode 2.5: Reptile Boy. Original Airdate 10.13.97

"Buffy and Cordelia attend a frat party where they are offered as human sacrifices to a reptile-like creature." Yes, it's just as dumb as it sounds.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Hey! It's Lucky Spender #3, Greg Vaughn, from General Hospital! It's actually nice seeing him play a jerk.  I'm so used to seeing him as a nice guy.
  • I will never get what college guys want with HS's very pervy, if you ask me.
"My name is Douche, and this is my fratbrother,
Other Douche. We park outside high schools."
"I am a dick! It's a metaphor!"
  • In the opening scene, Xander seems better at braiding Willow's hair than Buffy is...
  • I love the cemetery in the WB parking lot.  The tombstones looks so incredibly fake.  Is this an Ed Wood production?
  • Cordelia's fake laugh is awesome. 
  • I've never hidden the fact that I'm way more into the sci-fi/fantasy/comedy side of Buffy and not so much into the romantic side but lines like "When you kiss me, I want to die!" make me want to hurl.
  • Again with the weird random computer searches, Willow.  Let's see how many words end in "ent", so we can see where that broken bracelet came from.  Again, I know we're supposed to suspend disbelief but I can accept vampires and werewolves faster than I can accept that Willow did a computer search and found out that a bracelet with the word "ent" came from Kent Preparatory School.
  • And we have our very first of what's to become many "penis monsters." ==>
  • I like Willow's blow-up at Angel & Giles, especially since she realizes it was something she had to do but solved nothing.
  • SHENANIGANS!  No one invited Angel into the frat house.  It should be protected, the same way other houses are protected because people do live there.  
  • Cordelia is just on this episode.  Everything she does is hilarious.
  • I also like how the third "victim" is just as feisty as Buffy is.
  • Sometimes I can like Xander.  Nik's non-reaction to Angel standing right behind him right after he's mocking him is hilarious.
  • YAY! Jonathan is back!

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Ugh. We have entered one of the bottom ten episodes in the series.
  • These tombstones leave something to be desired in terms of specificity:
  • Cordy's fake laugh sounds kind of like she's crying.
  • Also, who was her non-speaking acolyte? Where's Harmony?
  • Awww Buffy's dreaming of Angel!
  • "Well, I'm not a demon...which is why you should let go now."
  • "No, I don't think you know what it's like to be 16. And a GIRL. And a SLAYER."
  • Yay. I love how not interested in fratboys Buffy is.
  • Ew fratboys hitting on high schoolers. Ew ew ew these people are gross.
  • Seriously, why is no one calling an "ew" on this? These guys are hitting on sixteen-year-olds!
  • Aw Giles. I think maybe your fighting prowess is not enough up to the level of sparring with Buffykins.
  • Angel is wearing maroon! A color!
  • See, Angel recognizes the Ew of a man his age (or even apparent age) dating a high schooler. I guess this is to point out to us why Buffy's hackles aren't up higher about the fratboys hitting on her.
  • This episode isn't funny enough to mitigate its badness. Blarg blah blooooo please end the episode now.
  • "Askew means cockeyed." "Oh." See? it's not that funny.
  • I also really hate humiliation plotlines, so the hazing of Xander is just unpleasant too.
  • But I guess ... yay Buffy turning down alcohol and being a responsible teenager?
  • Except for then she takes a drink after all. Stupid Buffy.
  • Well. Buffy and Cordy sobered up quickly, especially considered they were roofied.
  • "Angel, how do you shave?" Willow gets the one funny moment of the episode.
  • The one not-loathable thing in this episode is Willow yelling at Angel and Giles.
  • Oh god. The stupid awful phallus monster. Ugh ew blah.
  • Why not call the episode "Snake Boy?" Reptile Boy is a stupid non-informative title.
  • Haha Xander got to punch the douche...and realized that punching douches hurts your hand.
  • "And YOU. You're going to jail for 15,000 years."
  • "I told one lie, I had one drink." // "Yes, and you were very nearly devoured by a giant demon snake. The words 'let that be a lesson' are a tad redundant at this juncture." Yay, but. This episode still sucks.
  • Awww yay more Jonathan!
  • "Angel Angel Angel. Does every conversation we have have to come around to that freak? Hey man, how's it going?"

Favorite Lines:

Daniel:  "Oh Buffy, it's like we're sisters, but with really different hair!" - Cordelia
Zelda: "Some guy's attacking Buffy with a sword. And also there's a big snake." - Willow. Why couldn't we just summarize the whole episode like that and then not have to watch it?

90s Factoid:

Look! The TV has knobs! KNOBS!!!

Arc/Continuity Stuff:
  • Cordy is attempting to date a fratboy ... Poor Devon?
  • Of course she's apparently also attempting to date a Jonathan.


Voiceover - Giles
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 1
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0 
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 1 (Tom)
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 1
Apocalypse Called - 0


  1. HAHAHAHA those tombstones are my FAVORITE!

    Also, yes... Frat guys are so damn skeevy in this one. And weirdly enough, Xander is the one to see the skeeze and object to it. And Angel, I suppose...

    I can't even remember what I said about this episode. Wow, this episode really does suck. :-\

  2. I'm sad. There's no more post. Please please continue.

    1. Don't worry! Halloween is coming this week! :)

  3. For some reason I missed this one before. I didn't find this one bad but it definitely isn't memorable. It's more meh to me, it can be kind of entertaining but the monster reveal is lacklustre and really silly because the effects are just bad.

    "I'm way more into the sci-fi/fantasy/comedy side of Buffy and not so much into the romantic side but lines like "When you kiss me, I want to die!" make me want to hurl."

    Is this really Daniel's side? It sounds more like Zelda. I feel exactly the same way about the line. It's awful.

    1. Oh, that's definitely Daniel. The line on its own I can take or leave, but (and maybe I'm in the minority here) in its context, following Angel's line, "This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you... you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after," I actually quite like it.

      Because Angel is trying to bring Buffy down to reality, but as she reads it, he's trying to belittle the depth of her feeling. So her answer is explaining the depth, or attempting to bring Angel up to her reality.

  4. SHENANIGANS! No one invited Angel into the frat house. It should be protected, the same way other houses are protected because people do live there.
    mmm This is subjective, for instance, one of the vampires was able to enter I think it was a school or college or something like that because there was a sign out front that said something in latin, i think, that translated to "Welcome all Seekers of knowledge" something like that. So in some cases this could explain an ability to enter places like a frat house. Alternatively it might depend on who the deed to the house belongs to. If an organization owned it, like the frat alumni or the college, it then would become public property thus negating that clause.