PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Deep Tropical Cellular Tan

Episode 6.13: Dead Things. Original Airdate 2.05.02

"After Jonathan, Andrew, and Warren accidentally kill Warren's ex-girlfriend Katrina, they set up Buffy to make her believe it was she who killed the girl."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Ew. You know it's going to be a bad episode when it starts with Spuffy Sex.
  • And why are they covered in rugs? How did that work? Is the crypt more comfortable than the rugs? Also, why does Spike have so many rugs?
  • Seriously? Spike's really asking the "where is this going?" question?
  • Ugh, the trio. I'm saying 'ugh' a lot this season.
  • "We can make any woman our willing sex slave," aka, "we can rape any woman we want." Great guys. And you wonder why you're loathed.
  • Tara!
  • But also, why doesn't Tara have a job? It's not like her family supports her.
  • Aww, she's worried about Willow so much.
  • Jonathan: "Red head's too tall." Heh.
  • Stop saying bazoombas.
  • *SHENANIGANS* It's nice that Warren put on the sunglasses so the extreme hypnotizing light didn't work on him. But what about the 100 other patrons at that bar? Why didn't it affect them?
  • This is so gross and sick what they're doing.
  • "Is there singing?" "Visible and everything." - throwbacks to two eps in one scene!
  • So the other two don't know about Katrina.
  • I really hate Andrew, but Tom Lenk is pretty hilarious.
  • Amelinda Embry (Katrina) is playing this really well.
  • Jesus. When Katrina finally says the R word, their reactions. Jonathan and Andrew. Because they're stupid little boys who were never taught to respect women. They really thought what they were doing wasn't wrong.
  • And this is the episode where they become true villains.
  • I like Anya & Xander's outfits; it matches their dancing.
  • Ugh. There I go again. Ugh. Can we fast-forward this part? Seriously? No-one sees this happening on the balcony?
  • Aww Tara and Willow awkwardness.
  • Put a shirt on, Spike.
  • I guess the trio is doing their weird physics time thing again.
  • This episode makes me want to watch DoubleMeat Palace again.
  • Weird sex/murder dreams!
  • I think the first time I saw this, I was on Buffy's side. She was doing the right thing. But I think I understand Dawn's side more now. While I think Dawn is a little over the top about it, she's right about Buffy wanting to escape. There were other solutions Buffy could have thought of. She knows something was off with the time/physics stuff.
  • "No one will ever find her." Cop: "Where'd they find her?" 2nd Cop: "The River." Spike: "Oh Balls."
  • See how helpful Anya is? They so don't appreciate her.
  • The reactions to getting away with murder are at least consistent of what I think of the three. Jonathan is the only one who is a bit wary. Which is why a lot of his choices confuse me.
  • This scene with Tara kills me. SMG is so good. She's so sure that something's wrong with her. It's this deep depression Buffy has that ... I think I'm seeing more clearly than I ever have. It's way more well done than I ever remembered. It's akin to Gretchen's current story on You're the Worst. [No spoilers! - Z]
  • So heartbreaking.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • All right, this is the episode where the nerds are actually called out to their faces for their misogyny and treatment of women as objects, and yet behold how the idiots still follow Warren, the worst of them around (even if Jonathan is showing more resistance).
  • But first! Spike and Buffy having sex under a rug.
  • "Are we having a conversation?" // "What? No. No. Maybe." Is this the first time they approach functionality as a couple? Too bad it won't last. 
  • "Do you even like me?" // "Sometimes."
  • Cerebral Dampener. To make pretty women extra brainless and compliant. Warren, you are the fucking worst. And you want to use it on your ex who dumped you when she found out you made and abandoned a robot girlfriend who then tried to murder her. WHY HAVEN'T WE KILLED WARREN YET, YOU GUYS.
  • Wow, tumblr has changed me. Even though I still think Amber is mediocre, Tara showed up at the Doublemeat Palace to visit Buffy and I said "AWWWWWWW" because Tara is a good friend, y'all.
  • I have the strange urge to watch Shelby Woo to cleanse my Adam Busch palate. Do you guys remember Shelby Woo?
  • Dawn, stop giving Buffy passive aggressive attitude because she's trying to keep you from becoming homeless by working a menial job. This shit right here is why I couldn't stand Dawn on first watch.
  • ugh this plot is so gross. I mean, it's supposed to be, but just ugh.
  • Why didn't Warren just make a Katrinabot, since he's basically turned Katrina into a bot. Because he wanted to dominate the real Katrina. He wanted to punish her. To trick himself into thinking the real Katrina was his object.
  • "This is not some fantasy ... it's rape!" The tiny bit of credit I can give Jonathan and Andrew is their shock when she calls it rape - which it fucking is - but then they do try to stop her from leaving anyway.
  • So much for being villains. They didn't want real consequences. Boys playing with toys where everything's pretend. But Katrina's dead now.
  • Warren's not freaked out the way they are. He's just trying to get out of it, get around it, deflect the consequence and the responsibility of his action.
  • 'WE'RE ON UPN NOW" say the writers as Buffy and Spike have anal sex on the balcony.
  • It's a pretty cool slash scary sequence, the time-jumping deception the Trio use to trick Buffy into thinking she accidentally killed Katrina.
  • The horror Buffy's feeling, thinking she's killed Katrina? THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD HAVE FELT, WARREN, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE.
  • "Dawnie, I have to." These writers are mean, invoking the line Buffy spoke before she jumped off the tower. It's the line Buffy uses when she's leaving Dawn behind - in life, or in freedom - since here, it's when she's about to turn herself in to the police.
  • Oh, apparently Sunnydale has a river. Okay, sure, why not.
  • The argument between Spike and Buffy here is mirroring so much the same argument Buffy had with Faith when Faith accidentally killed Finch. 
  • And then with the "you're dead inside. you can't feel anything real," we've got the parallel with Faith-in-Buffy beating up Buffy-in-Faith in Who Are You.
  • There's some really good work happening in this episode. It's hard to watch, but it's well done.
  • Ugh. "We really got away with murder. That's ,,, kind of cool." Stupid stupid Andrew.
  • Oh no, Buffy's gonna cry, you guys. 
  • "I didn't come back wrong?" She needs for there to be something wrong with her. Because that makes it not her, it makes it an exterior problem. But if there's nothing wrong with her, then everything is wrong with her.
  • "Do you love him? It's okay if you ...and Buffy, it's okay if you don't."
  • "Please don't forgive me, please."
  • You guys, this season is so upsetting.

Here, if you guys are feeling sad, just look at SMG laughing in the dailies!

Favorite Lines:
Daniel: "Come share in the joy of our groove thang." - Anya
Zelda:  "Do you love him? It's okay if you do. He's done a lot of good, and he does love you. And Buffy, it's okay if you don't." - Tara

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Recurring: the Trio, Jonathan's Magic Bone, Tara, Katrina, Gina (old lady cashier at Doublemeat)
  • Dawn's friend Janice still exists. Off-screen.
  • Shoutouts to Once More With Feeling and Gone.
  • Jonathan masquerading as Katrina a callback to his impersonation of a demon in Life Serial.


Anya's Hair - blonde, soft waves, and then some weird messy pull-back.
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 3
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 1
Apocalypse Called - 0


  1. Life is horrible and empty and UGGHHHH.

  2. The scene behind the police station. .. both SMG and JM act the hell out of it. So good.