PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Thursday, January 17, 2013

I'm Buffy, the Vampire Slayer, and you are?

Episode 3.1: Anne. Original Airdate 9.29.98

"Buffy - living on her own in a big city - assists a girl whose boyfriend has mysteriously vanished. Back in Sunnydale, Buffy's friends do their best to battle the forces of evil."

Daniel's Thoughts:
  • I’m so excited because this is my favorite season opener.
  • I'm glad the season starts with the classic vamp coming out of the grave but…
  • It’s Willow waiting for him and not Buffy!
  • I love the huge dramatic moment of Oz about to throw the stake that will kill the vampire, complete with swelling music and just kinda falls down.  Cause he's not Buffy!  And that never works if you're not Buffy!
  • “Come and get it, big boy?”  HAHAH
  • Did Willow really not know Oz’s plans after HS? I mean is she really the type to date a total slacker?
  • The dream is sweet…and a way to keep David Boreanaz on contract.
  • The dream turning into the harsh reality – it’s a nice transition.
  • YAY! Oz is in the credits!
  • Buffy is a waitress!  And she’s serving Burt Reynolds!
Burt Reynolds Catchphrase.
  • Hey Chanterelle!  I think it’s cute and interesting that they brought such a minor character back. But it works so well.
  • "We have a peach pie. I can’t guarantee there’s a peach in it." heh.
  • I didn’t think I’d like two separate stories where Buffy isn’t in scenes with anyone else, but it really works here.
  • Oh my God! There are students in the library!  Is it because it's the first day of school?  Because we just got our books in class. [YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BUFFY LEAVES TOWN, PEOPLE? CHAOS REIGNS. - Z]
  • “Don’t get killed” is a nice mission statement.
  • Cordelia’s phrase “organized fun” is something I’ve used before.
  • I love Cordy & Xander’s nervousness.
  • While I still find it weird that Willow didn’t realize Oz didn’t go to summer school, I’m glad she’s disappointed in him.
  • LARRY!  And his line about not having so many mysterious deaths is freaking hilarious.
  • It also shows that the students of Sunnydale aren’t as in the dark as they sometimes seem.  Which is proven further down the line in The Prom.
  • Awww Buffy is so sad and alone!  She needs to start punning.  That will make her feel better.
What rhymes with Spaghettios?
  • I like that Giles is at least searching for Buffy and not blindly waiting for her to return.
  • Chanterelle/Lily is so adorable. She's a really interesting character. She just wants to find somewhere to fit in.
  • Hehe, and it’s cute that she didn’t know that “Chanterelle” is a type of mushroom.
  • I wonder what her real name is. Beverly?  I bet it’s Beverly.
  • Ken is fucking creepy!  And twice in the Whedon-universe, he plays someone who looks human but ends up being a demon.
  • Is it depressing song night at the Bronze? Actually the lyrics are uplifting but – OMG, Xander just said the same thing.  Did I remember that or was it my own thought?  THE MIND BOGGLES.
  • I love Oz being thrown in the mix.  He’s hilarious.
  • Aww, Joyce is actually being a good concerned mom.  This will not last.
Maybe it's a bezoar.
  • While I don’t think Joyce should blame Giles, I do understand feeling the way she does – being left out of a major part of Buffy’s life.
  • “And they give cookies!”  That’s such a bone-headed thing that…I would say.
  • So the stuffed bird….did Buffy pack that bird?  Now, remember from my last recap, she left with a tiny tiny duffel bag – which I assume was filled with essentials.  Was there really room for that bird? And if she was going to choose one stuffed animal, wouldn't it be Mr. Gordo?  Ok, maybe she bought it here in LA.  Maybe it reminds her on Mr. Gordo.  Maybe I’m writing too much about a tiny prop.
  • And there’s creepy Ken going in for the kill.  He knows his prey, I’ll give him that.
  • I love how Buffy casually tears the phone out of the wall.
  • She’s bad at undercover but she’s really good at interrogation.
  • Yeah, right, like Cordelia would do anything for Buffy’s sake.
  • And Xander does his first douchey thing of the season, using Cordelia as bait and actually saying the plan is for her to get killed.  I just...don't think that's something you should joke about, especially living on a hellmouth.
  • Wow.  The black pool.  Terrible visual effect. [I ... kinda liked it? = Z]
  • Ooh, it’s like Indiana Jones and the temple of Doom!
  • What exactly are the slaves doing/making?
  • Cheesy romantic music when Xander and Cordelia kiss.  I love it.
  • I like the skeletor make-up
  • Buffy runs like a kid, flailing her arms all over the place
  • I love the mini-scythe weapon!  So well-designed!
Communism never stood a chance against the Slayer.
  • So it feels like they’ve saved only like ten people out of the 100 slaves that are there.  That’s a shame.
  • Lily shoved Ken!  And was so surprised that she did it!  She’s so cute!
  • Lily is now Anne!  And we’ll see her grow up on Angel.
  • Kristine Sutherland is really great in this final scene.  Her annoyance that someone is knocking at her door while she’s busy, then turning into hope that it might be Buffy...
  • And's not a tear.  Hush.

Zelda's Thoughts:
  • Nice return to basics, starting in a graveyard with a vampire rising. But oh! It's Willow, with new hair, waiting for him.
  • Kung fu vampire!
  • Xander's looking pretty attractive in this graveyard light. Don't tell Daniel I said that.
  • "Do you think Buffy knows school's starting tomorrow?" All the sad hopeful Willow faces.
  • Angel's hands are so much bigger than Buffy's hands.
  • "If I was blind, I would see you." I will allow the pulpy talk because it's Buffy's heartbroken dream.
  • Buffy wears a lot of jewelry when she sleeps. Is that a thing people do? I feel like I wouldn't. If I actually wore jewelry with any kind of regularity.
  • Location! Not just a cop car, but a street with actual aging and damage and cement repatchings rather than smooth paving. The things I notice.
  • Buffy's pigtails and red trimming on her outfit are actually reminding me of her Little Red costume in S4.
  • Hi Lily! What's the point of getting a forever tattoo if you change your name every five minutes?
  • "But then again he's always been attracted to monsters." Cordy's already having her prophecies! Spoilers?
  • Oz, you're so cute. "That's what summer school is for." // "Yeah. Well, you remember when I didn't go?"
  • "Summer is over! Be somber." Ummmmm ...
who the hell are you?
  • I'd say nice contrivance, keeping Oz in high school another year to keep him on the show, but I actually completely believe it's in character for him to just not bother with school.
  • Nice long tracking shot as we reenter Sunnydale High, Joss. Don't think we didn't notice or appreciate.
  • AWWW. We cut from bustling Sunnydale High to Buffy sitting alone and silent. ALL THE SAD THINGS.
  • "I'm no one." Our first clue!
  • Aw Giles. Running off to Oakland to hunt down Buffy ALL THE SAD THINGS.
  • "Yes, one must try." It's that British stiff-upper-lip belief-in-good-things that makes me love Giles. And that makes him save us all in The Wish.
  • "I'm no one." Second clue!
Veeeeeeeeeeery familiar.
  • Holy crap Buffy gets all kind of flipped from that car. It's cool though - it shows Buffy's ingrained need to protect All the Humans isn't entirely dead.
  • Hi Ken! You're a creepy ass dude. At least as far as Joss Whedon shows are concerned.
  • "You get old fast here." You ain't just whistling Dixie, Ken.
  • My sister's standard response when Carlos Jacott appears on any show: "He's evil! And that's not his real face." She's not wrong.
  • Hey guys, ... wasn't this shot used to open Angel the Show? ==>
  • "I blame you." It's sad because Giles is already most certainly blaming himself too, and I think Joyce is rationally incorrect to say that, but I also understand where she's coming from. Her daughter has left, and it's because of things she didn't know about but Giles did, and as a responsible adult, he didn't see fit to tell her. She's supposed to be the one taking care of her daughter, and she's been taken out of the equation.
  • Julia Lee is lucky she's likable, because she's playing full victim on Buffy, and it's not an attractive look on anyone. "I'm helpless! I have nothing of merit to offer but my helplessness! Help me?" Then again, she is responding to Buffy's hero complex thing, which she saw evidence of in Lie to Me, and again the night before with the man in front of the car.
  • Oh god and she even says "But ... he takes care of me."
  • Smart Buffy cottoning on to the connection between donating blood and the people disappearing/aging.
  • "Is it ... cuz of you? You know about monsters and stuff. You could have brought this with you." Um, fuck you, Chanterlily.
  • And Ken walks into frame like a creepy pedo.
  • "Hope is a real thing, just like despair. And hope can fill a part of you that's missing."
That's what ... she said?
  • First Giles cleans his glasses, then Buffy breaks a door. We're getting alllllllllll the stats this week!
  • "Breaking into your office and going through your private files." I love you Buffy. And then she pulled the phone out of the wall. I double love you Buffy.
  • Oh Buffy she is pissed.
  • "The cleansing." Ken be creepy. But Lily, she's done several cults, so she knows all about that sort of thing.
  • Parking lot graveyard! (do a shot)
  • Oz's stake is taller than Oz.
  • "Why can't Willow be bait?" Oh look, Willow is bait because you two are bickering.
  • "I woke up and I looked in the mirror and I thought, hey, what's with all the sin? I need to change. I'm ...I'm dirty. I'm bad with the ... sex and the envy and that, that loud music us kids listen to nowadays. W - okay, I just suck at undercover. Where's Ken?" We're giggling.
  • I love that Buffy doesn't hesitate to go diving after Lily. That's our Buffy!
  • Ewwwwwwwwwwwww Ken's demon face is all gooey.
  • Aaaaaaand Xander and Cordy are making out. With the rising music and the rising music.
  • "I always knew I would come here, sooner or later. I knew I belonged here. [Where?] Hell."
  • A good clue that Buffy won't let herself become no one like everyone else is - she's not wearing the burlap sack uniform.
  • This demon's makeup is so badass.
  • Here's why Buffy's awesome. She's not just saving them. She's helping Lily empower herself, so she can take care of herself in the future. Buffy is a much better role model than anyone else ever.
  • Apparently there are some discontinuities, when Buffy's breaking out, of shoes between her and the stunt Buffy. I'm not gonna bother to track it, but they're there.
  • "Humans don't fight back! That's how this works!" Go 'way, Ken. Your outrage is funny, but go 'way.
  • This fight is pretty awesome.
  • "You've got guts. I think I'd like to slice you open and play with them." Eh. Kinda weak smack talk.
  • "This is the price of rebelli--aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah" haaaaaaaaaaa
  • See Willow? This is how you smack talk a demon before you kill him: Gandhi.
  • Buffy's "crappy" apartment is pretty clean. And she lives alone. It's not bad.
  • "Can I be Anne?" d'aw. because she wants to be strong and self sufficient like Buffy.
  • Joyce has that look of hope and trying not to let herself hope, and she opens the door, and Buffy's on the other side, and waaaaaaaaaaaaah. Joyce's face. Buffy's face. I'm crying. THE FEELS.


D:  Who is that guy?
Z: (looks it up) Chad Todhunter. (keeps looking - he hasn't really done stuff we know)
D: He looks like someone who's working now.
Z: Sebastian Stan?
D: No, someone who does movies now.
Z: He was in Captain America!
D: No, that guy who was in Hurt Locker and that one episode of Angel.
Z: My boyfriend Jeremy Renner?
D: Yes, he looks like Jeremy Renner.
You be the judge.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: Buffy: You wanna see my impression of Gandhi? *smashes Ken's face in*
Lily: Gandhi?
Buffy:  Well ya know – if he was really pissed off.
Zelda: "If we can focus, keep discipline, and not have quite as many mysterious deaths, Sunnydale is gonna rule!" - Larry. Poor, sweet, dead Larry.

90s Factoid:
Cordy's sweater tied round her waist.

Arc/Continuity Stuff:
  • Last season, Buffy killed Angel. She left town without telling anyone, leaving a note for Joyce. She also got expelled, but I mean, does that really make a difference right now?
  • Seth Green is now in the opening credits. Though he's been sent to Hell, David Boreanaz is still there, too.
  • Chanterelle from Lie to Me is back, but now her name is Lily. Next her name will be Anne.
  • Oz is repeating his senior year. 
  • Larry's still here.
  • Buffy's middle name is Anne.
  • Ken's other roles in Joss Whedon projects: Ken on BtVS, Richard on AtS, Dobson on Firefly.


Oz's Hair - light red
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 3
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 1
Buffy Breaks a Door - 1
Evil Reveal - 2 (Ken, Blood Bank Doctor - yes, that's her name)
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0


  1. "Hope is a real thing, just like despair. And hope can fill a part of you that's missing." *pic of Scott Hope* "That's what she said?"

    YES! That is awesome. Lol

    Also, that guy doens't look like Jeremy Renner at all. He kind of looks like that guy in the middle picture but not like Jeremy Renner.

    1. Wheeeeeeee! Zelda for the win! The middle guy is Sebastian Stan, currently appearing as the Mad Hatter in Once Upon a Time.

      They all have slightly similar face shapes I guess?

  2. Pretty awesome, I’d say. And I especially like the diner scene in Anne the best of all. This is because Buffy experiences what it’s like to be sexually harassed for the first time. While she’s on her shift as “Anne” and waits on a trucker and his redneck friend, the trucker calls her “Peaches” and asks her if she’s sure she doesn’t want him to “work it off for” her when she tells him to pay the bill at the counter. Then, when Buffy turns and begins to walk away, the trucker’s redneck friend reaches out and slaps her rump. Of course Buffy stops and starts to turn back to them, wishing she could tell them off. However, Buffy stops herself before she can do so, as not only is she in a position where she is unable to do or say anything about her being harassed in that way, but she has made a decision to keep a low profile – a decision that she now regrets and wishes she hadn’t made at all.

  3. I had all sorts of feels for buffy, but really she left the hellmouth unguarded? No very much doing your duty there Buffster. Although that brings up the point as to, what was going on in sunnydale before buffy? Futhermore whats happening in Cleveland since there isnt a slayer there? Maybe its Slayer+Hellmouth that equal lots of boom?