PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Close Your Eyes and Think of England

Episode 2.22: Not Pictured. Original Airdate 5.09.06 

"The second season ends as Veronica, on her graduation day, learns who is responsible for the bus crash. After uncovering the culprit, her life is endangered as she tries to warn those closest to the killer. Also, Wallace learns some surprising information about Jackie, Keith enlists Veronica's help in his ongoing investigation of Woody, and the seniors celebrate their graduation with a lavish party at the Neptune Grand."

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • fuck you Aaron Echolls. you're the worst and everyone hates you
  • "So this is how it is. The innocent suffer. The guilty go free. And truth and fiction are pretty much interchangeable. There is neither a Santa Claus nor an Easter Bunny, and there are no angels watching over us. And nothing makes any sense" We talked about this a bit in the comments for the last episode, but this is such a concise summing up of Veronica's (and the show's) world view. It's a very noir outlook, the cynicism, the lack of faith in law enforcement or the judicial process to actually achieve justice. That's why the Marses are P.I.s and that's why Veronica goes vigilante so much.
  • Okay it's time for me to change tacks and have a petty rant. Because this is making me too angry and V's hair looks great. What is it with TV shows that have a tough female lead, giving them too-short and not-always-flattering hairstyles, that almost instantly get undone as the shows go on, and by the end the hair is long and glamorous and red carpet ready? I'm thinking mainly of Stana Katic on Castle, but I know it happens a lot and it's dumb.
It's dumb. Source

  • omg the Mars faces. V's face, then Keith's when Vinnie calls on the phone.
  • Vinnie is awful, but Ken is the best.
  • oh man, V's face when Keith reads out that Woody has had chlamydia. Because Beaver got it from Woody and gave it to V ... Duncan needs to get his stuff checked out.
  • Oh man, V's graduation dream, so heartbreaking. They're in their old house, Lianne is there and she and Keith are happily married, Keith is still Sheriff. Duncan's still around, but interestingly, V's with Logan in this dream. And she doesn't know Wallace at all. That one hurts.
  • Though I am confused that not-as-cool-Wallace needs corrective lenses and our Wallace doesn't.
  • And there's our Lilly, alive and well, back from her first year at Vassar, but standing in front of her memorial fountain.

  • "Do you smell bacon?"
  • Keith and V, tracking down Woody.
  • V and Wallace's mom cheering loudly for Wallace as he walks across the stage at graduation.
  • Fuck. Fuck. They're arresting Weevil at graduation, in front of his family. And it's deliberately cruel timing. "Just let me graduate ... please don't do this, man."
  • It's not quite the same moment of Buffy's class protector, but everyone cheering loudly when Veronica's name is called (including Keith's beautifully proud papa moment) is very sweet.

  • Aw Keith didn't get V a pony, but he did buy her a trip to NYC. As a New Yorker, I agree, this is a great gift.
  • And now we reveal Jackie's true backstory I guess? She's a waitress in Brooklyn (which explains how she was so instantly good when she got the job at The Hut)
  • Aaron has the stones to come stay at the Neptune Grand. Just leave town, you shit.
  • Logan's his dependent again? Is Logan not 18 yet?
  • Go Keith! You found that shithead Woody!
  • Woody justifying how he molested those boys, thinking it means he cared about them. Gross gross gross gross.
  • And shit, Beaver saw V's text to Mac, trying to warn her, and he is luring her to the roof.
  • And on her way to the roof to meet a murderer, she shares an elevator with another murderer. Fuck you, Aaron Echolls, and your mustache twirling shittiness.
  • I wish V had been recording his out and out confession just now. At least I know Clarence Wiedman will fix this.
  • Wow, why is Beaver pretending he murdered Mac with his "better place" nonsense? Is that just to make sure V thinks he's not kidding around?
  • I do like how the season finales on this show always bring back literally everyone we've seen all season. Even if it involves Beaver plowing a car into Curly Moran and killing him, after the PCHers beat him up.
  • I hate that it turns out V was raped after all, when they sort of undid it last season.
  • What's really frustrating about Beaver's turn here is the unrepentant and seeming indiscriminate nature to Beaver's kills. The other ones felt more pointed, but now it's just killing anyone. Actually no, I take it back. He killed a lot of people on the bus, just to silence Peter and Marcos. Fuck Beaver. I guess I will still complain that we had very little hint of this, because it's one thing to ruthlessly orchestrate his father leaving the country; it's quite another to rape people, kill a bunch of people, and feel no remorse. And his molestation from Woody doesn't cover all that, or excuse any of it. At least with Aaron last season, we had clues from the beginning of how violent he was, and how sexually loose he was. This feels more like a deliberate twist of the villain where we least suspected one.
  • I don't want to interrupt this very tense and scary scene, with Logan fighting Beaver, but that roof set looks almost as fake as The Room's roof set. 

We're totally on a roof. That's totally really the outside, and
these are totally skylights to the building that's totally
below us.

  • and V's ready to shoot Beaver. "You're not a killer, Veornica. Give me the gun." Logan's as scared as she is.
  • "Beaver, don't!" // "My name is Cassidy." // "Cassidy, don't."  // "Why not?" And Logan can't give him a reason. "That's what I thought."
  • And Beaver is dead. Good riddance.
  • Mac is alive, thank goodness, but she's so confused and scared. "He took my clothes. He took everything. Why?" And V just holds her as they both cry.
  • Ew Kendall and Aaron. Ew.
  • Wow so I guess Kendall will come out of the shower to a super dead Aaron because HE'S SUPER DEAD.
  • Thanks Clarence Wiedman.
  • Daniel: "Hey Duncan. Get tested. Get your baby tested."
  • Not a bad farewell to Duncan, all things considered: nice moment in a dream sequence, and he exacts revenge for his sister's killer. And then hangs out in Australia.
  • And a good farewell to Jackie too, as she takes responsibility for her life.
  • I love the visual parallel to the beginning of the season, with V passed out in Logan's lap.

  • And Logan quietly lets himself out when the Marses reunite.
  • And Kendall inherited Beaver's company. Welp.
  • Interesting that there's almost no follow up on Aaron's murder.
  • Man, this is the weirdest cliffhanger for the season though: Kendall and her mysterious Quentin Tarantino briefcase, and Keith doesn't meet V at the airport. It's weird. it's just weird. I love this show, but that is a weirdass final moment.
  • it is kind of funny to think about it, though - our big villains from the first two seasons are all dead: Aaron, Woody, Beaver. The Fitzpatricks are still kicking, and I think they have something to do in S3, but we're mostly tying up a lot of loose ends (aside from the weirdass cliffhanger). So we can go into season three with a mostly wiped slate.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • We begin where we left off.  Aaron Echolls is giving a speech outside of the courtroom to the press and all his fans.  And people are cheering that a murderous statutory rapist and assaulter is not being prosecuted.  It’s so sick.  It's so apropos of today.  And yesterday.  And probably tomorrow.
  • Aww poor Wallace.
  • Yay! Vinnie Van Lowe made the season finale.
  • Oops, Vinnie’s in jail.
  • Woody’s got Chlamydia (still not a flower, Gia – ask your dad)
  • Aww, Lianne in a dream scene.  In a dream sequence, her parents are together, her dad’s Sheriff,  Duncan is still here, she’s dating Logan – and she’s never met Wallace.  That last part is weird.  It’s bizarro world. But here’s the best part.  Lilly is there…standing in front of a memorial for herself.  What an odd dream.  But it was nice to see Lilly back for a little bit. 
  • Veronica doing an impression of Gia is scarily good.
  • Haha, “I checked Google Earth”. 
  • Wallace Fennell graduates!  And aww, his mom is there.  We haven’t seen her in a while.
  • And fucking Lamb.  He can’t wait ten minutes until Weevil walks across the stage?
  • That is so damn sad.
  • Cindy Mac MacKenzie is a couple of people before Veronica Mars..alphabetically, so they get to chat during graduation.  Cool coincidence.
  • “I can’t decide if my life is going to be easier or more difficult” – Aww, Mr. Van Clemmons.
  • Why is Dick not graduating? 
  • Awww, Wallace flew to Paris to be with Jackie…except…
  • Jackie is in Brooklyn working at a diner.
  • Veronica figures all this out because…well, she’s Veronica…and sends Jackie to JFK  for his layover – except…post-9-11, Jackie wouldn’t be able to meet him there….unless she buys a ticket. (She did.)
  • Ugh, Woody’s excuses for molesting children – it’s just so …I can’t listen to this.
  • I forgot that Woody owns a fast food chain.  A lot of people are going to be out of a job, soon.
  • And finally, Veronica sees who also might be a victim of Woody’s: Beaver.  But why does she think he’s dangerous?
  • I don’t want to feel sorry for Beav but a child molester monster destroyed his life.  Again, it doesn’t excuse the things he’s done.
  • And like she didn’t have enough to do – here’s Aaron Echolls in an elevator rubbing it in.
  • And ‘Veronica was right’ but I still don’t understand how she figured it out.
  • Ok, so she put together about 100 different things that I didn’t notice – and that’s why she knew it was Beaver.  That’s why she’s the private detective and not me.
  • Oh wow, and he killed Curly too.   And wrote “Veronica Mars” on his hand.  It’s all coming together!
  • And the 2 year long mystery of who raped Veronica Mars is answered as well, but it feels a bit thrown in and convenient…
  • Wow, Beaver has murdered a lot of people.  Eight people on the bus, Curly – and now a bunch of people on a plane …including what may be Keith.  Can he be classified as a serial killer or a mass murderer?  Probably the latter.
  • And Veronica gets tased…twice.
  • And poor Mac.  “He took my clothes, he took everything.”  She doesn’t even know the half of it.
  • Wowww, and Duncan’s the one who hired Wiedman to kill Aaron Echolls.  So that’s two creeps we’ll never see again which is kinda cool.
  • And Jackie bought a ticket to get in to see Wallace.  And she has a son? What?
  • It’s the next day and Veronica still thinks Keith is dead.
  • But he’s not! Surprise!
  • Wow, And  Cordelia is getting away with a lot of cash.
  • Keith: “Carol Channing’s still alive, isn’t she?”  12 years later, still true.
  • Aww, and Logan & Veronica are kissing.  When did this happen?  When he saved her life I guess?

Veronica: And pepper spray, for if we run into that Trump character.
D & Z: *simultaneous gasp and scream of horror*

Favorite Lines:
Daniel: “I can’t decide if my life is going to be easier or more difficult." - Principal Van Clemmons on the graduation of Veronica Mars
Zelda: "Do you smell bacon?" - Dream Lilly

Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Duncan (gasp!), Logan, Weevil, Dick, Beaver, Jackie (Absent: NO ONE. GOLD STARS ALL AROUND)
Recurring: Aaron Echolls, Sheriff Don Lamb, Mac, Vinnie Van Lowe, Lilly Kane, Lilly's memorial fountain, Clarence Wiedman, Lianne Mars, Marcos Oliveres, Peter Ferrer, Alicia Fennel, Kendall Casablancas, Woody Goodman, Principal Van Clemmons, Corny, David "Curly" Moran
Veronica's Alias: Gia Goodman

Dead Humans - 5
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Beaver Tases Veronica - 2
Beaver Tases Logan - 1
Keith Tases Someone - 1
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 1 

Logan Punches Someone - 0 (it's more a tackle fight than a punching fight)
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0

Monday, September 17, 2018

Elementary, My Dear Wallace

Episode 2.21: Happy Go Lucky. Original Airdate 5.02.06

"As Aaron Echolls's trial is about to conclude, tensions rise as Veronica, Keith and Logan take the witness stand to testify against him. Meanwhile, after Veronica finds a suspicious e-mail in Woody's computer, Keith turns to Lamb with evidence to arrest Woody, but Lamb refuses, believing that Keith is trying to turn him into a laughing stock. Also, to everyone's surprise, Lucky brings a gun into school with the intent to find Gia."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • And it’s time for Aaron Echoll’s trial.  And he’s totally playing it up for the jury and they’re totally buying it.
  • Wow, and he’s really claiming that he didn’t have sex with Lilly.  Follow-up from the previous episode when lawyer asked Veronica about his relationship with Lilly.
  • Duncan is being set-up and he’s not even here to defend himself.
  • “Easy Going Veronica Mars – that’s what the kids at school call me.”
  • It’s nice that they remember that Gia & Veronica are in health class together.
  • Also, it’s nice to finally see Veronica actually studying – the thing I always get on her case about.
  • Oh crap.  Gun shots.  It’s Lucky The Janitor.
  • And good-guy without a gun, Wallace tackles Lucky to the ground.  He shoots at Wallace, but the gun is full of blanks.  The security guard’s aren’t.  He shoots Lucky dead and fuck, this is going to be really traumatic for the kids at Neptune High.
  • “Nobody likes a blonde in a Hamster Ball.”
  • “Why should you break in when I’m invited?” – This should be on the Mars family crest.
  • They’re actually showing Jackie a lot these finally few episodes.  That’s nice.
  • Oh hey, it’s Beaver.  I mean, they should show him once or twice before the finale.
  • Aww, MySpace mention.  Remember them?  I’m so old I used to be on Friendster.
  • And we/Veronica finally sees how Woody Goodman is a really horrid person…and how he might be connected to the bus crash.  Except Veronica doesn’t recognize the voices yet.
  • And Veronica is being sworn in.  This is always nerve-wracking.

  • And the prosecutor is totally slut-shaming Veronica now, and the judge is allowing it and it’s totally gross.
  • Aww, Mac is helping out Weevil and Beav – even though neither of them really deserve it – especially Beav.
  • I don’t really understand why Keith is going to Woody with this before going to the police.
  • I know I’m late to the game of realizing this – but has Jackie been living by herself for like the last six months with no guardian?
  • Damn, they’re really trying to tarnish Veronica’s reputation to get Aaron off and it’s really super gross.
  • “If I get you an A, will you shiv him?” - Mac
  • “Is your ego really that enormous that you can turn the murder of 8 people about you?”  - Yeah that pretty much sums up Lamb.
  • I love the Weevil passing Algebra is a major plotpoint in the penultimate episode of Season 2.
  • And oh no.  Just as Weevil passes Algebra, he’s being pegged in a crime.
  • Wallace: “It was worth getting taped to a pole…”  Awww.
  • Instead of starting her final, Veronica books it to the trial.  Which is very irresponsible of her…considering how important getting the Kane scholarship is to her.  There’s no need for her to be at the trial.   And especially to find out that Aaron has been acquitted on all counts.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • We open on Aaron Echolls. We open on talking garbage.
  • AND HE IS LYING. LYING. lying sack of shit, claiming he never had sex with Lilly, claiming he broke up with her, saying Duncan "probably" killed her. I hate him, I hate him so much.
  • I thought witnesses weren't allowed to watch other people's testimony if they haven't testified yet? Did I make that up? Is that just something I mistakenly picked up from other TV shows?
  • V has everything riding on acing her finals so she can get the Kane scholarship and go to Stanford. Since we know the future, we know this will somehow go wrong. She walks out on a final or something, right? Something heartbreaking.
  • Shit, I forgot about the gun. Fuck. This is. This is not something good. And probably not something they would be able to do like this now, with the frightening increase in school shootings.
  • Shit, and when Lucky aims the gun at Wallace after Wallace tackled him. Fucking terrifying.
  • And then the school guard shoots Lucky dead.
  • I don't have anything funny to say.
  • Woody reveals that Lucky was a bat boy for something or other - a clue to the ultimate reveal
  • Woody's password is "mrgoodwood" ew ew
  • Rando: Hey Veronica. // V: Hey ... you. // Rando: Hart. // V & Me: yeah we've never seen this dude before (except IMDB says he's been on the show before, so--ah, he's the one who had the film of Logan's mother jumping off the bridge)
  • gasp V found an audio recording, of the boys talking about what Woody did to them! if only we can figure out the voices on the recording
  • Also why was the subject heading about preventing the incorporation? Is this really just about Beaver's company?
  • Woody, being the Uber Creeper "Are you as smart as you think you are?"
  • I'm amazed he's being chill (well except for the creeperness) with V, considering what's been going on between him and Keith
  • Ohhh the one who sent the tape edited himself out of the tape
  • EW EW EW EW EW Aaron is claiming Veronica propositioned him? EW EW EW EW
  • I do like that V figured out how to help both Beaver and Weevil with their problems - scratched car and passing Algebra - and matchmade them. Although ... they're not gelling well.
  • But Mac chimes in and is the best and I love her hi Mac please become a season regular.
  • ew though this is also so she and Beaver can rekindle, just so we can hurt her more
  • "I'm not a fifteen year old boy, Woody. You don't scare me." man I can't wait for Woody to go down.
love Keith so much

  • Aw Terrence is finally free! Thanks Leonard Lobo!
  • Oh but Lobo is here to tell us just how he wants his thanks. With Terrence glad handing all his casino patrons for the next decade, until his debt is repaid
  • I just. I don't understand this and I never will. I don't understand why they don't get to testify to what they saw, but instead are told what lies Aaron said, and are asked questions as if that were the fact. It makes me want to vomit.
  • And I hate that this shithead Lavoie provoked Keith enough that he assaults him in court.
  • GASP V figured out that it's not the bat boys for the Sharks that Woody assaulted (well, not just them), but also Woody's little league team also called the Sharks - and several of the bus crash victims were players.
  • I'm confused. It seems like Jackie's also lying to Terrence about the Sorbonne (knowing the future is rough). Wouldn't he know she can't afford it, and that she'd actually just be going back to her mom? Or was that not a lie, and she was going to go to the Sorbonne before Terrence lost his fame and fortune?
  • And then fucking Lamb, embarrassed several times over when trying to find the person who caused the bus crash, won't act on Keith's evidence that Woody is a serial predator and could also be the one behind the bus crash (though he isn't).
  • Oh man, Weevil just wants to to pass algebra, make his grandma proud.
  • And just in time, the boys who saw Weevil when he knocked out Thumper have come forward, now that Thumper's remains have been found.
  • "You better enjoy this, because this is as nostalgic as I get. I just wanted to say, it was worth getting taped to a pole. Gonna miss ya." // "And my stupid ass face?" Aw babies.

  • And now it's time for V to sabotage her final exam and a chance at the scholarship and Stanford - because she wants to see the verdict in person. And it's the wrong verdict. I hate this. Everything is garbage.
  • Meanwhile, Woody fled on a private plane.
  • BUT SERIOUSLY HOW DID AARON NOT GET CONVICTED FOR ANYTHING. Even putting aside his tap dancing evidence around Lilly, he assaulted both Marses. 


D: We should have had a stat for how many grown men sexually objectify teenage girls. It happens so much on this show.
Z: But then our stats would break.
D: It's so gross.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: Easy Going Veronica Mars – that’s what the kids at school call me.  - Veronica

Zelda: "It was worth getting taped to a pole." - Wallace


Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Logan, Weevil, Beaver, Jackie (Absent: Duncan, Dick)
Recurring: Aaron Echolls, Ethan Lavoie, Gia Goodman, Lucky, Woody Goodman, Mrs. Goodman, Terrence Cook, Hart, Sheriff Don Lamb, Deputy Jerry Sacks, Leonard Lobo, Mac, Rodney Goodman


Dead Humans - 1
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0