PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Tuesday, November 18, 2014

One-Stop Spot to Shop

Episode 5.8: Shadow.Original Airdate 11.21.00 

"Glory transforms a snake into a terrifying monster in her quest to find the Key; Joyce is hospitalized after being diagnosed with an illness."  

Please welcome Sophia!  She is our friend, fellow Wolfram & Hart employee and guest blogger for the next four episodes!

Sophia's Thoughts:

  • Buff, this is a fight you can’t win because it is not your fight; it’s your mom’s fight.
  • Is it just me or has Dawn become more precious to Buffy, now that she is a slayer mission?
  • You see kids…that’s why we got rid of phone books. Besides being completely useless in the cellphone age, they attract the wrong type of people—evil gods who are willing to pay for goods and services.
  • Spike, stalker much?…Perv much?…Eww!
  • Spike is forever a poet. He loves poetic diction, alliteration, and metaphor. “the lover-wiccas…a bit of prod ‘n probe. Bite-sized one went too.”
  • Did the doc just say nearly one out of three do just fine? What is nearly one? 0.8? These are terrible odds.
  • Out of the mouths of babes: “She doesn’t get all worked up like that over you.”
  • Poor little lost lamb Riley. Does he think letting vamps feed on him will make him darker?
  • Oh, look Giles’ new car is not just pretty; it drives really fast too! Also, why aren’t there more high speed car chases in Sunnydale? Would it be like Pleasantville where the end of the street is just the beginning again? Inquiring minds want to know.
  • This episode is just one of many this season that will test Buffy’s strength in new ways and help her come to understand herself better. Being a teenage girl and a slayer are not mutually exclusive. Both identities inform who Buffy is. Although, they require different resources—Buffy, you can’t use magic to heal your mom, but your support as she goes through this is helpful—the unique mixture of the two is what is going to help Buffy get through this season.
  • Shadow/ Darkness/Evil: So far, we’ve learned that shadows aren’t always evil; sometimes they are just part of nature. Darkness means different things to different people—I’m looking at you Riley, Spike, and Buffy. And evil (read: vampires) are not always evil…they can be downright “harmless?”.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Nooooooooooo Joyce noooooooo.
  • Dammit show.
  • I feel for Dawn here. Asking random nonsense questions because it's too awful to be alone with your own thoughts, waiting in a hospital.
  • Tara looks so gorgeous.
  • "Am I right, Giles?" // "I'm almost certain you're not, but to be fair, I wasn't listening."
  • Oh god. The Glory minions are here.
  • blah she is saying her lines wrong again.
  • See, Giles, this is what happens when you put an ad in the phone book. Psychotic exiled Gods come to your store and buy things! Any cook could tell you that!

  • Oh right. Spike's doing that creepy clothes-sniffing thing. Stop being creepy, Spike.
  • Buffy has a fluffy pink sweater? I bet you it's Willow's!
  • Aaaaand he stole her underwear. Stop being creepy!
  • While Spike's not wrong that Riley's not Buffy's long-term love, his delusion about his own appropriateness for Buffy at this juncture is ... impressive.
  • Joyce and Buffy, both trying to be strong, trying not to cry, not to show each other their fear. Dammit, show.
  • Tara is definitely much more confident speaking up in Scooby gatherings since Family. I dig it.
  • Ugh. Giles is totally cleaning his glasses out of frame. But we don't have a confirmed visual so it doesn't count.
  • Brain tumor. Totally not cool, having real world stuff intrude on our metaphor magic!
  • And Buffy's bewildered quiet panic at the doctor's questions, regarding insurance and other things - she didn't expect to have to grow up so suddenly. She can save the world, but she doesn't know how to do this.
  • "Anya, your heys are startling the customers."
  • I like that Anya can see from the receipt what spell is being planned.
  • Sunnydale has a carousel? Sure, okay.
  • More bad Dawn line readings.
  • Riley's selective hearing: he hears that Buffy doesn't get worked up over him, but not that he's been good for her. Also I don't want to see him getting all butthurt about Buffy's behavior when she's dealing with a problem she doesn't know how to solve, the possibility of her mother's mortality.
  • Emma Caulfield's comic timing this episode is perfect.
  • There's so much build up to the snake demon Glory's gonna create, and then it's just the worst CGI ever.
  • At least this snake demon isn't as penis-y as some of our others. penis-y

  • This episode is so weak. Like yes, first time we hear Glory's name, first time we find out why Joyce hasn't been well, moving along Riley's inferiority complex, and Anya and Giles are delightful, but otherwise this episode is so meh. And that CGI ...
  • Sad montage of sads. Buffy, limping and waiting in the hospital, Riley drinking at Willy's, Dawn doing homework and knowing something's wrong, Joyce finding out.
  • Snake demon! Glory told you to go to the holy places! Why are you at the carousel?
  • Giles-mobile to the rescue!
  • Glory claims to be on a schedule. She is? Since when? She kind of takes her time.
  • CGI Buffy! Look at her flowy CGI hair!
  • Buffy punches the snake until it is dead. And then keeps punching it.
  • Witness Riley's butthurt because Buffy didn't want to break down in the middle of a hospital corridor with her family three feet away, expecting her to be strong for them.
  • If I deflect enough anger at Riley I can ignore how sad Joyce's story makes me.

Daniel's thoughts:

  • Joyce going through the cat scan is just...oh man
  • Why is it called a cat scan? Shush, Dawn. But also, aww.
  • Here Dawn, have a cola brand cola. 

I love Cola Brand Cola!

  • Glory saw Giles’ ad! At least he knows it’s working?
  • So Spike is giving the finger in the credits so it’s basically in every single episode. But it’s the English way. So…it’s not obscene?
  • Ew, Spike, Ew. Stop. Just stop sniffing Buffy’s clothes.
  • Don’t worry, Spike – no matter how long you’re out in the sun – it won’t do a thing to you.
  • So oblivious. I love it. "[Glory] could be anywhere!" She…could have just bought dangerous magical items from you...
  • This is so well directed the way Buffy is getting the news…the doctor starts talking but she doesn’t really hear much beyond ‘brain tumor’.
  • 1 out of 3 is not great odds, doctor no-bedside-manner.
  • Eww. It’s Ken doll. Zelda just told me that Ken Doll is on How to Get Away with Murder which just blew my mind because his acting has improved there.  Zelda thinks it's the beard.
  • “Are you stupid or something?” Heh. Oh, Anya. Thank god for Anya. She just knows things.

Always listen to Anya.

  • I love when Dawn describes a memory and you know it’s a fake inserted memory and there's such detail in it.  That's some powerful magic right there.
  • Oh, Dawn. She thinks she’s helping. “She doesn’t get that worked up over you.” I wish Riley had more confidence in himself.
  • Anya is so ON this episode.
  • “Just once I’d like to come across bunny-worshipers”//“Thank you very much for those nightmares.”
  • Sunnydale Zoo! We haven’t been there since Xander became a Hyena.
  • Wow. The snake Glory grabs is so fake. It falls like rubber.
  • Aww, Xander is worried about Riley.
  • A snake monster. Maybe we can chase it around with Ebola. Or a box that just says Ebola. [Or attack it with hummus – Oz]
  • Riley, stop it. Just go find Buffy.
  • How is Riley going to cover up that bite mark? How about the scarf Buffy used to cover up Dracula's bite?

Looks natural.

  • Awful awful CGI snake monster. It’s on the one street of Sunnydale!
  • CGI snake monster is bad but puppet/guy in costume snake monster isn’t terrible.
  • Oh. Riley in a turtleneck. In Sunnydale. But also, covering up his neck wound….
  • Listen to what she needs, Riley.  Just listen...she's telling you what she needs.

Favorite Lines:
Sophia & Daniel: "I for one didn’t want to start my day with a slaughter…which has shown how much I’ve grown!" - Anya
Zelda: "Are you stupid or something?" // "Allow me to answer that question with a firing." - Anya/Giles

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • First appearance: Glory's scabby minions, Dr. Kriegel.
  • Recurring: Joyce, Tara, Glory, Ben, Sunnydale Zoo, Sandy the Vampire
  • We finally learn Glory's name.
  • The cause of Joyce's headaches is revealed - a brain tumor.
  • Shoutout to Anya's bunny fear ("Just once, I would like to run into a cult of bunny worshippers.")
  • Shoutout to the Mayor being a snake thing
  • The Magic Shop's address is listed as 5124 Maple Court

Anya's Hair - shoulder-length, honey blonde, extra curly
Dead Humans - 0
Dead Undeads - 2
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Buffy Breaks a Glass Display With Her Body - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0

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