PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

REVIEW ARCHIVES

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

I Left My Bra in His Car





Episode 5.15: I Was Made to Love You. Original Airdate 2.20.01



"Buffy and her friends encounter an incredibly strong female robot with only one thing on its mind - love."





Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Aww.  The anticipation of the ending of this episode…
  • Aww, Puffy Xander.
  • “Or maybe you can just be Buffy; he’ll see your amazing heart and he’ll fall in love with you.”  That’s the Xander I like.  He’s rare.
  • April the robot is adorable.
  • I like Joyce’s dress from the boobs up.  The Africa pattern is a bit weird.
  • The spinning thing is very cute, though.
  • “I’ve had two boyfriends.  And they both left.  I mean really left.  Like left town, left.” 
  • TARA & ANYA talking and having a scene!  There should be more of these!
  • "Yes. I'm thinking of buying something really expensive. Maybe an antelope!"
  • I want to see the website Anya designed!
  • I love how all of Sunnydale U’s parties are themed.
  • Oh man, Buffy is using the Cordelia laugh with Ben!
  • And Willow has an ugly turtleneck on.  Quel surprise.
It was 95% off at Ugly Sweaters R Us
  • How long does it take Ben to dump his drink?
  • I like James Marsters way more than I like Spike.
  • Wow, that extra girl has been playing limbo for like 10 minutes.
Limbo is not a marathon sport.
  • Yeah, we get it: “Coffee” is Buffy.  Oh, Ben, how did you pass your medical exams?
  • Oh cool.  Willow’s going computer nerd!
  • “I left my bra in his car”. It’s nice that Joyce can tease Buffy just as much Buffy teased her earlier.
  • Aww, Oz shout out.
  • Creepy Ted mention.
  • Jeez, Spike is really good at traveling through sunlight.  In the video game, there’s an entrance in the cellar.  Also, there’s a cellar.
  • I love Giles getting all badass with Spike.  “We are not your friends.”
  • Buffy is being really transfer-y right now.

  • “She growls?  You made her so she growls?”
  • The ballad of April is so sad.  It’s nice that Buffy is waiting with her while she…lets go.
  • The actress, Shonda Farr, is really good.  Especially here as she powers down.  According to her IMDB page, she hasn't done a lot since.
  • Xander should start his own business!  It should be called "Very Good Construction." 
  • Buffybot a-comin!
  • And then…yeah.  Interesting that they did a little preview for next episode instead of waiting. I heard they were originally going to end the episode with Spike ordering a Buffybot.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • I love this episode but also I DON'T WANT TO BECAUSE JOYCE DIES AT THE END.
  • I'm not ready.
  • "I'm alive. I can tell 'cause of the pain." Oops Buffy beat up Puffy Xander.
  • I love the actress who plays April. She's delightful. Poor April, though, her boyfriend sucks.
  • "He's a nice, normal guy, okay?" // "I think I've heard of those."
  • Joyce is all nervous and cute STAY ALIVE JOYCE.
  • "I'm thinking about buying something very expensive. Maybe an antelope."
  • I love that Anya's so smart about her money. Also computers. Daniel might have been right about Anya being the best.
  • Oh Buffy, Ben is not a good option. He's a doof. And he can't act until he grows his beard and becomes a fake lawyer. Also he's Glory.
  • Is this a commercial for chex mix? There's a closeup of Anya's snack.
  • April's hair is so shiny and pin-straight. I want to pet it.
  • Spike, again with the dumb strategy.
I just keep laughing the more I stare at it.
  • "Bloody hell! You threw me through a window. What's that about?"
  • "I've had it with super-strong little women who aren't me."
  • Poor April. This is just awful.
  • This episode is so weird. Like, a lot of funny lines, but there's just something slightly odd about everyone.
  • I just got really sad because I recognized the shirt Buffy's wearing. Motherfucker.
You know the shirt I mean.
  • Reminder that Ben is Glory, Glory is Ben.
  • Oh look, Warren is a bad boyfriend to robots and humans alike.
  • Giles is breaking out his scary Ripperness.
  • Also Spike has a reflection. 
  • I'm amazed April isn't in stilettos. Those are some comfy looking sandals.

  • Uh oh, Warren, you've ignited Buffy's rage on behalf of the abandoned women.
  • Poor Katrina. First April almost kills her, then next season Warren actually kills her.
  • "But I can be whatever you want. I love you. I'll do whatever you want."
  • Yay Katrina, you dump Warren's ass. You deserve so much better. So does April.
  • Everyone deserves better than Warren Mears.
  • "Crying is blackmail. Good girlfriends don't cry." Fuck you, Warren.
  • It's weird we get April's death scene. And we don't get Joyce's. "It's getting dark," she says, and it's so sad.
  • Do we think it's significant that April powered off before she said the word "dawn?" Asking for a friend.
  • Oh look Xander's doing his job. That's rather sweet. And he's good at it.
  • LET'S JUST PRESS PAUSE RIGHT NOW AND CALL IT THE END OF THE EPISODE.
  • I'm actually welling up knowing what's coming. This is not okay.
  • Oh I forgot Spike showed up at the end of the episode. Kind of a fun twist, you think he put everything in the box in a rage with the intent of throwing it out, but it was actually for a bot request.
  • "Mommy?" FUCK.


Favorite Lines:
Daniel: "She speaks with a strange evenness and selects her words a shade too precisely." - Anya
Zelda: "Um, well, we listened to aggressively cheerful music sung by people chosen for their ability to dance, then we ate cookie dough and talked about boys." - Giles the Babysitter


Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • First appearance: Warren Assface Mears, Katrina
  • Recurring: Joyce, Tara, Ben, Glory
  • Buffy's still upset about Spike's crush.
  • Shoutout to Oz. ==>
  • Warren was at Sunnydale with Buffy and crew, and knows who she is.
  • Shoutout to Ted, the other bad robot boyfriend (and none for Moloch Weiners)
Stats:

Anya's Hair - blonde, curly, shoulder-length
Dead Humans - 1
Dead Undeads - 1
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Spike Breaks a Window with His Body - 1
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Like Lollipops at the Circus

Episode 5.14: Crush.Original Airdate 2.13.01



"Buffy learns that Spike has a crush on her - a situation made all the more dangerous by Drusilla's return to Sunnydale."


Zelda's Thoughts:


  • Oh right this is the ep that opens with All the Dancing. Including Anya being amazing. 
  • I wonder from whom Spike stole that shirt. Way too light-colored to be one of his.
  • It's sad that Spike's "diabolical fiend"-dom comes in the form of stealing Xander's change.
  • "Let's just call her - " "Ben!" WE SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE, SHOW.
  • Really? Sunnydale is the last stop on the train?
  • Oh. Harmony's here. Did we know Harmony was here?
  • "Oh, I'm gonna stake you!" Someone wasn't president of the drama club at Sunnydale High.
  • "I feel safe with you." //  "Take that back!"
  • This is just. Dawn has a crush on Spike, and the only way she knows how to demonstrate is to flatter his vanity because she knows he has a crush on her sister. It's all weird.
  • It's funny, though, when Spike's telling his horror stories to Dawn, you see major echoes of what he was like when he first showed up three seasons ago.
  • "I rip it open, very violent, haul her out of there ... and then I give her to a good family in a nice home where they're never ever mean to her, and didn't lock her in a coal bin."
  • Hey Buffy, though, you can't yell at Dawn for hanging out with Spike one minute when you keep bringing Dawn and Joyce to him for protection the next. No wonder Dawn's got mixed signals.

  • Xander's laugh about Spike's crush is amazing ----->
  • So how did Sunnydale's Finest miss the Drusilla doll on the train? Oh wait, they're deeply stupid.
  • More stolen lighter-shaded shirts for Spike. We see you, Spike. We know what you're about.
  • The vamps are making popcorn. That's so cute and domestic.
  • "Slayer." *runs away*
  • Holding the door open is actually really cute. Like he tried to trick her into a (really lame) date and he's been deflecting around, but the door was instinctual and dorky.
  • But also, with his understanding of blood, sex, and violence, it makes sense that he thought this was a good idea for a date. Insane Troll Logic sense, but you follow me, right?
  • Dear Spike, please learn to read your audience though. She's not into you.
  • "You're like a serial killer in prison!" // "Women marry them all the time!"
  • He says he's changed, but as we'll see, he hasn't yet, not really, or not enough. Anything not evil he does is done either because he likes beating up demons, or for the sake of Buffy. Drusilla's appearance cements that point clearly - he's ready to kill again when she's around.
  • "Pre'y Spoike." So. How's that accent working out for you?
  • Drusilla's trying so hard not to laugh in Harmony's face. This is kind of amazing. 

  • Spike and Dru did always have fantastic physical chemistry. The way they move with each other, sometimes barely touching, but gliding together. It's cool to watch, and a reminder of how they were both cast in the first place.
  • Oh Spike's vamp grill. Haven't seen that in a while.
  • Pretty sure Spike's crypt's lower level is bigger than Buffy's house.
  • "You can't love without a soul." // "Oh we can, you know. We can love quite well. If not wisely." Dru went all Shakespeare.
  • Further evidence of Spike's current lack of understanding - offering to kill Drusilla? Also not the way to Buffy's heart.
  • "Don't mock this." // "Go mock yourself."
  • Oh also, Spike, threatening to have Dru kill Buffy if she doesn't admit she feels something? That's like, Bad Wooing 101.
  • "The only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious." Spike's lack of understanding at first is kind of hilarious.
  • JM is great in this ep, but man is Spike fucking up left and right.
  • Yes, Spike, blame Dru, that's also a good move.
  • "This, with you, is wrong. I know it. Not a complete idiot."
  • Okay but it's kind of hilarious that while he's yelling at his two paramours, Harmony comes back and shoots him with an arrow. I really do love Harmony, even if a little goes a long way with her (she's kind of like Andrew that way)
  • So question mark. That arrow would have killed any vampire who wasn't a regular on this show, yes? Spike, owner of the tiniest heart known to vampirekind.
  • Question mark the second: Why does Buffy not go after Dru or Harmony? They're both evil vampires and not neutered like Spike is. She should stake all three of them.
  • I mean, that being said, I'm glad she didn't. But it's probably also good the Council and Giles weren't here to witness it.
  • JM is so good at the realization that he's been uninvited.
I aced my mime final.
  • Suggestion: If we stop watching with this episode, then Joyce never dies, right? Right? That's how it works, right?


Daniel's Thoughts:



  • Bronze: Anya dances like a spazz.  
She dances like me!
  • Aww, all the couples are dancing and Buffy is sitting alone.
  • I like his new brown leather jacket.
  • While I like Buffy’s meangirl attitude against Spike, she’s such a hypocrite.  She’s always asking him for favors; she even told the council that he’s one of her friends….sort of.  I don’t really know how they went over to interview him.
  • Of course the train’s last stop is Sunnydale.
  • Why is Giles babysitting?
  • Ugh, Harmony dressing up as Buffy for sexroleplay is creepy but also funny.
  • Zelda is excited that the newspaper confirmed her body count.
  • Why is Spike dressed like he’s in post-apocalyptic military garb?
Either that or he's an extra on Star Trek
  • Ew, why does Dawn all of a sudden have a crush on Spike. “You talk to me like I understand things…”.  Oh, that’s why.  Understandable-ish.
  • I do like that Spike is telling Dawn super scary stories that are also true.  Because we all should remember that Spike is a psychopathic killer.
  • And yes Buffy still comes to him for help.
  • He does not have cool hair, Dawn.
  • Dawn’s the only one that notices Spike’s ‘crush’.
  • It’s creepy that Buffy just sat in taped outline of one of the bodies.
  • Miss Edith!  Did the police not find that when they were clearing the train car?
  • Vampires love Jiffy Pop.
Coincidentally, Zelda just made some popcorn
  • Drusilla!
  • Thanks for the recap of Angel, Spike.
  • Drusilla is so amused by Harmony.  I love it.
  • What the heeeeeellll is Willow wearing? 
Is she that cold?  Does she dress in the dark?  What the ever loving hell?
  • And what the hell are the waitresses at the Bronze wearing?
Did they rename The Bronze to The Silver?
Get it? Get it? Silver? Get it?
  • Hey Spike’s a pretty good artist.  Like Angel.
  • “You’ve taken my chair and the music hasn’t stopped.”  I love Dru.
  • I feel like Spike was the first guy who shouted, “Why don’t bitches like me? I’m a nice guy.”
  • SMG looks like she can just pull her hands through those cuffs.  They’re so big
She's just playing with him.  She can get out at any time.
  • Sarah Michelle Gellar’s headshot is amongst the pictures Spike has. 

Crossfire!

Dawn: [Spike]'s got cool hair.
Daniel: He does not have cool hair.
Zelda: Yes he does.
Dawn: (continuing) Right, that's why you were never with Angel for three years.
Daniel: Angel has cool hair.
Zelda: ANGEL'S LAME. HIS HAIR GROWS STRAIGHT UP AND HE'S BLOODY STUPID.



Favorite Lines:


Zelda: "Don't mock this." // "Go mock yourself." - Spike/Buffy
Daniel: "Oh we can, you know.  We can love quite well. If not wisely." ~Drusilla



Arc/Continuity Stuff:
  • Recurring: Tara, Spike's love for the Onion Blossom, Ben, Harmony, Joyce, Drusilla
  • Continuity: The Bronze's remodel after Olaf's visit (also includes the excision of the flowering onion)
  • Willow's still nursing migraines from the teleportation spell
  • Sunnydale has a train station. In addition to its bus depot, airport, and docks.
  • Drusilla's been hanging out with the resurrected Darla in LA, trying to turn Angel. He set them on fire, so that went well.
  • Buffy discovers Spike's creepy shrine.
  • After bragging to Riley not that long ago that he remained invited to the Summers's home, Spike has finally been uninvited.

Stats:

Anya's Hair - blonde, curly, shoulder length
Dead Humans - 8
Dead Undeads - 0
Giles Unconscious - 0
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal -  0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 0