PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Cold Draft of Paralyzing Fear

Episode 5.20: Spiral. Original Airdate 5.8.01

"Buffy and her friends flee Sunnydale when Glory closes in on Dawn."

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Oh right. Glory.
  • Run, Buffy, run!
  • Aw stunt Buffy carrying stunt Dawn. It's really sweet since SMG is already tinier than MT.
That wig, tho.
  • Glory getting hit by a truck. Never not funny. Frankly, I laugh whenever a character gets hit by a truck. It made the S1 finale of Skins kind of awkward. (spoilers?)
  • "A truck hit her." // "Oh." // "You threw it at her?" Bless Anya, still trying to cheer Buffy's success.
  • This is bad, guys. I'm having preemptive feels, seeing everyone in their finale outfits. THAT'S WHAT GILES WEARS WHEN BUFFY IS DEAD. THAT'S WHAT ANYA WEARS WHEN BUFFY IS DEAD. This isn't going to go away.
  • Poor Buffy. She's so scared. She has to protect Dawn. She's being strong and leadery about it, but she's scared.
  • Oh look a female scabby minion.
  • Ben, stop "acting." Your monologue of pain? Dull
  • Hah Spike and his bug-eyed goggles.
"I also have SPF 10,000"
  • Oh right. The Knights. I keep forgetting about them.
  • Sure is convenient, the brain-suck victims suddenly a lot more specific about Dawn being a key (first Tara, now Orlando the Knight). Now everyone's in on the fun!
  • I like they acknowledge how easy it is to burn Spike in this ramshackle RV, when Tara pulls at the blinds
  • Also bless Spike for not being a dick about it.
  • "It just keeps coming ... Glory ... Riley ... Tara ... Mom." STOP MAKING ME FEEL FEELINGS.
  • Meanwhile, in the Inconsistent Characterization of Dawn, she's very mature and supportive sister mode this week.
  • "Arrows! They're throwing arrows!"
  • "Weapons?" // "Hello? You're driving one."
  • One of the things I love about this episode is, arguing aside, the group is really working together as a team - run as a team, fight as a team. Really reinforcing the motif of family they've been exploring this season, which will be very important when Buffy spoilers and Dawn has no biological family left (because her father is a toolbag)
  • Also goddamn Spike grabbing the sword. OW OW OW but also cool.
  • Badass Buffy roof fighting! You go, Buffy! 
  • Oh no Giles! Oh no RV!
  • Spike staggering away from the SUNLIGHT EVERYWHERE
  • "We got company. And they brought a crusade."
  • Oops Spike can't fight the Knights.
  • Scary Black-eyed Magic Willow
  • "What kind of god would demand her life for something that she has no control over?"
  • "I'm so proud of you. You've come so far. You're everything a Watcher - everything I could have hoped for." STOP WITH THE ALMOST DYING SPEECHES, GILES. NOT COOL.
  • Also fuck you Ben. Just in general. But also because if you're not here to kill Dawn to keep her from Glory (which you don't do), then what you are doing is putting Dawn and Co. right in the line of Glory's fire. You dipshit.
  • Aw see. Even Xander and Spike, who hate each other, and mention said hatred frequently, are still helping each other (the Xander lighting Spike's cigarette moment). Because right now they're family.
  • But the ties are loosely knotted. It's Buffy's determination to get all of them out of this alive that's holding them together.
  • "Kill the man and the god dies." YAY LET'S GO KILL BEN. BEN KILLING PARTY, ALL ARE INVITED.
  • This episode does a lot of work at setting up the finale - explaining Glory's full backstory, as well as Dawn's - but it's still so much just about the Scoobies and their bond.
  • Look at Ben, trying to act again. Give it up, Ben. [Grow a beard, Ben - D]
  • Ooops it's a Glory.
  • "Hey, it's Gregor. *kills Gregor* Now it's not." Okay that was well delivered.
  • Oh god, Buffy's face, as she's repelled by the barrier that Glory broke through.
  • And then when she breaks through, and all the Knights are dead, and Dawn is gone. Just gone.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Where are they?  A dorm room? Since when is their dorm on the first floor? Is it Tara's? [Decor makes it seem pretty Tara-like. - Z]
  • Did we know Glory had super speed?
  • Love Buffy’s stunt double carrying Dawn.  So obvious that it’s a stunt  double with the really bad wig.
  • Interesting that a big calamity like getting hit by a truck – body trauma – seems to be a trigger for Glory turning back into Ben.
  • And Ben, of course, isn’t as strong as Glory…
  • That must have been an awkward walk home for Ben...
"I' a Frat..."  Say no more.
  • “Drop a piano on her!”  - YAY ANYA.
  • I love how Glory’s minions are such assholes to Ben.
  • “You exist only because of her divine greatness.”  It’s the first clue we have about how this Glory/Ben thing happened.
  • If Ben were a better actor, I’d feel sorry for him. 
  • RV time!
  • Wow.  Those knights are good at undercover.  /s
  • Those knights.  It’s just…they feel like they’re out of a completely different show.
  • “He doesn’t travel well.  He’s like fine shrimp.”  Hehe.
  • Anya made snacks!  Well..she brought SPAM.
  • Wow, sunlight actually hurt Spike? WHAT?
  • It’s interesting.  Buffy’s usually so closed off.  But it’s nice she’s opening up to her lil sis.
  • “At least things can’t get any crazier.” Dude….  Dawn, I’m going to start calling you Little Xander. [Comics version of Buffy is feeling the squick with that remark - Z]
  • This feels like the biggest budget they’ve had.  Being on location, nice horse/RV chase…
  • How did the knights even find them?
  • Anya using a frying pan to fight the knights.
  • Seriously, Buff.  How do you fight so well in leather pants?  I mean the chafing alone.
  • Yeah.  Spike.  You’re in real danger walking through the desert.  Sure.  Good thing you have that tiny blanket…
  • Giles omg. 
  • Spike can’t fight the knights because they’re human.
  • Ugh, Religious freaks.  Willow can outspell your god any day.
  • Oh hey, remember that time that Xander had soldier memories?  The show does.  All. The . Time.
  • Why would Ben come, knowing what he knows?
  • I love Spike rolling his eyes at Ben’s lame attempt at flirting.
  • Now I see where all the Xander/Spike slash comes from with the cigarette lighting etc.
  • Ok, so Glory has been part of Ben since he was born.  That’d be an interesting story.  Seeing baby Glory grow up.
  • Aww, See Anya and Willow can get along.  It’s nice that Anya wants to help Tara.
  • Pretty good transition between Ben/Glory.  The effects are getting better.
  • And…just like that.  No more knights.

Buffy: *throws an axe into a Knight's chest*
Zelda: Is he dead?
Daniel: Yes. Oh! We haven't been counting.
Zelda: But Buffy's not allowed to kill a human.
Daniel: He got an ax in his chest. I think he's dead.
Zelda: ... people recover from that all the time.
[Editor's note: per IMDB, he is dead]
Favorite Lines:

Zelda: "Aim for the horsies." - Buffy
Daniel: "Drop a piano on her!" - Anya

Arc/Continuity Stuff:

  • Recurring: Glory, Tara, Ben, Minions, The Knights Who Say Key, Anya's obsession with shrimp (she compares a motion-sick Xander to fine shrimp), brain suck victims
  • General Forehead Guy gives us the backstory on Glory's tale of banishment and being trapped in a mortal man's body.
  • He also tells us the Key's purpose - open the gates that separate dimensions. Glory's plan is to use Dawn to open the gate and go home. But also all the gates will open and the world will go kablooey.

Anya's Hair - honey-colored, loose curls, past her shoulders
Dead Humans - 12 + All the Knights (we're going to say an additional 20) = 22
Dead Undeads - 0
Dead Flashbacks - 0
Giles Unconscious - 1
Giles Cleans His Glasses - 0
Buffy Breaks a Door - 0
Evil Reveal - 0
Unevil Reveal - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
Apocalypse Called - 1


  1. When I first hear you mention Gregor, I immediately thought of Game of Thrones and then I was like "Oh right, those Knight guys." :-/ They really didn't fit into Buffy well. What a weird addition, they were.