PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE

PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.

REVIEW ARCHIVES

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

And I Don't Want You Seeing Kid Rock

Episode 1.14: Mars vs. Mars. Original Airdate 2.15.05


"When a girl in school accuses Veronica's favorite teacher of sexual harassment, Veronica finds herself pitted against her father, who is hired by the girl's family to get him fired. Meanwhile, Logan enlists Veronica's help to track down his mother, who he believes is still alive."


Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Hello my ship is here and it's awkward.
  • Man, Logan. "I just need to know she's okay."
  • Oh man, Adam Scott. A delightful actor. A less than delightful character.
  • Time for the Rooks/Knight/Bishop story!
  • Did I mention I'm seeing a concert staging of Chess in Feb with revised script by Buffy's own Danny Strong? Because that's a totally on topic thing to mention. Because their last names are Chess pieces. That's the joke. That's the segue. Anyway, BE JEALOUS.
  • I ... don't love that Veronica's default is to not believe the girl making the accusation. I know she's suspicious by nature (and it is revealed that there is a lie in what Carrie says), but Veronica's a rape victim who was laughed out of the police station when she tried to report it. It's all too typical that Carrie Bishop is getting slut shamed by the school (and she is), but I would love for Veronica to buck that trend, and, you know, NOT.
  • Maybe if Mr. Rooks had existed before this episode, and become someone we'd invested in the way Veronica seems to have, as one of the good teachers, it would be less frustrating, because we'd want to believe in his innocence too.
  • Oh boy I'd forgotten that the beginning of Logan and Veronica detecting also coincided with her trying to fix things with Deputy Leo. "I used you, then fell for you, not the other way around." OKAY BUT HE'S AN ADULT AND VERONICA IS A TEEN AND THIS FEELS RELEVANT WHEN THE MYSTERY OF THE WEEK INVOLVES AN ADULT HAVING AFFAIRS WITH MINORS.
  • mannnnn the realization that the "witness" that Lynn Echolls ran away is actually a delusional nutbar. Poor Logan.
  • WEEVIL HI WEEVIL.
  • ...Weevil had nothing to do.
  • wow speaking of Mars vs Mars, Keith left his safe boobytrapped so Veronica got splattered with ink. "Honey, you don't have to get all blue in the face."
  • Weevil's back! Does he have something to do this time? "Finally! A Deep Throat to call my own." // "Not gonna touch that one."
  • I guess that's why Weevil was in an earlier scene with nothing to do - so he'd know Veronica was working on the Case of the Missing Echolls.
  • "Colleagues said you were .. (Veronica makes a face) Unique. (V makes a face) Gifted. (V makes a face) Unsettling?" // "I was hoping for delightful, but what can you do." boy do I relate to this. Also her faces are cracking me up:
Unique

Gifted.....unsettling?

  • "You'd destroy him." // "Destroy him? From where I stand, he's become more popular than ever. I'm the bitch that everyone hates." haha she's not wrong the world is a garbage fire.
  • And then Veronica effing slut shames her.
  • Oh look, Veronica realizes Mr. Rooks is a fucking predator after all
  • Hey guys, remember super skinny scarves?
  • Geez. I knew it was coming, but it's still gutting to see the footage of Lynn's jump. I'd also forgotten we saw that this ep, since we haven't had the Trina in the hotel stuff yet.
  • Oh wait, it's time for that part. Veronica got a message that Lynn's credit card was used.
  • "Honey, if I were in trouble, I'd want you on my side." // "Well, that's where I'd be." I love a Mars reconciliation.
  • So interesting to see Abel Koontz, who was so chilling when we saw him last, when he revealed he knew who Veronica was, and that she was Jake Kane's daughter, have the wind taken out of his sails. Veronica tells him she knows he's dying and taking the fall for Lilly's death, and suddenly he's got nothing to say. He doesn't have the shield of bravado, crowing about a murder he didn't commit.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • See, that’s how you spell “vs.”, Batman very Superman.
  • We continue from last episode. Logan comes in and no doggie coming to greet them.  Back-Up? Where are you?
  • “Well, if she's on the TV, she must be telling the truth.” 
  • Omg,  Baby Adam Scott!  How old IS HE?  He’s playing a teacher.  He’s way older than I thought he was.  OMG, that 2000s hair. [currently 44, 32 when this aired - IMDB]

  • Oops, a student accusing young cute teacher Adam Scott of sleeping with her.  And it’s whatsherface!  From that show about the rich Upper East-Siders.
  • And weird, Veronica immediately comes to the teacher’s defense….and comforts him instead.  This is crazy.
  • Even some of the female students are pro-teacher, vilifying the student.
  • Veronica is acting like a total dick right now. She’s acting like the masses.  Believe the older man over the teenage girl.
  • She’s even using words like “witchhunt”, a word that many old male GOP sexual harrassers are using now.
  • Hey! It’s Cliff!
  • Oh, it’s Deputy Leo J  All the good recurrings now J
  • “You fell for me?” *Deputy Leo Smile*  *melt*

[Yes. - D]


  • “She must really dislike you.” “There’s a club she can join.”
  • Keith is the only one that’s reasonable here.
  • Look, it’s Skist Cola.  And look, Veronica’s putting the logo right at the camera.  Is this a real cola? I can't find it on the interwebs.  It is not.  So it's super extra funny that Veronica keeps turning it so it faces the camera like real product placement.
Cool, refreshing Skist


  • I love that the fake tabloid is “The National Instigator” since…that’s what those tabloids do.
  • I love that Weevil made like a two second cameo…since he wasn’t in the last episode.  I love Weevil, but maybe he shoulda been a recurring character.  Really, the only two that should be regulars are Keith & Veronica.
  • I love that Keith put an ink bomb in the safe that he knew Veronica would open.  And Veronica’s face, ‘Motherforker!”
  • Oh, I was wrong. Weevil’s back!
  • “So you got a trophy for a rimjob?”
  • Man, Young Adam Scott needs to shave that poor excuse for stubble.
  • It’s really gross how much Veronica doesn’t believe Carrie.  And the thing is, I don’t think tenish years ago when this aired, I would be that aware of this.  I’m hoping a lot of people have grown up since then.
  • Pretty coincidental that Koontz and Kane are so close to each other in the alphabet.
  • “These are very serious charges, Carrie,” says the “judge” – like she’s the one who is not to be believed. “He’s a very popular teacher.”  As if that’s proof of his innocence.  And Veronica’s doing everything she can to prove it.
  • “You must have a gay friend.”  As if straight men can’t decorate.  Or as if all gay men can.  Ugh. Stahp.
  • I’m glad Veronica is admitting how wrong she’s been but I wish she had seen it earlier.
  • I kinda love the way Veronica talks to annoying freshmen.
  • Seeing Weevil talk to a freshman, though.  Man, the kid looks like he could be Weevil’s son and they’re only supposed to be a few years apart.  It’s hilarious.
  • Kootnz is so damn creepy.




Favorite Lines:
Zelda: Veronica: You're patronizing me? // Keith: To be fair, I am your patron.
Daniel: "So you got a trophy for a rim job?" - Veronica

Arc/Continuity:
Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Duncan, Logan, Weevil
First Appearance: Carrie Bishop, Susan Knight
Recurring: Cliff McCormack, Deputy Leo D'Amato, Vice Principal Van Clemmons, Abel Koontz
Future Famous Person: Leighton Meester, Adam Scott
Veronica's Alias: reporter for The National Instigator


Stats:
Dead Humans - 1
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 1
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 1 (Carrie Bishop was lying)
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 1 (Mr. Rooks is a predator)

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