PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Tuesday, February 6, 2018

It Was Heartfelt Crappy

Episode 1.19: Hot Dogs. Original Airdate 4.19.05

"When awkward classmate Mandy asks Veronica to help her find her missing dog, a much larger scheme is exposed as they follow the trail. Meanwhile, Logan's sister Trina begs her father to play a role in her new boyfriend's movie, while Logan suspects that Trina is hiding something."

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • Hey, it’s Weevil.  Haven’t seen him in a while.
  • Veronica’s tutoring him in math – it’s nice that she’s doing him a favor.
  • For a private conversation, word about Veronica’s accusation (which wasn’t really an accusation) got around fast.  I imagine Duncan told Logan – but I feel like Logan wouldn’t tell anyone.  Who knows?
  • Logan’s cool.  He points to the ceiling and the bell rings.  How did he do that?  Not gonna lie, I’ve done the same with my automatic doors at work.
  • Poor Mandy.  She just wants her dog back.  I’m glad Veronica is sympathetic enough to help her.
  • Veronica to Leo: “How are you?” CAN’T YOU TELL BY THAT SMILE?
  • I…I dunno.  Alyson Hannigan is just so miscast in this role.   It’s obvious she was only given it riding the coattails of Buffy.
  • “Coolest girl in Neptune High.”  It’s nice when people reveal their awe of Veronica
  • I’m glad Veronica stood up for Mandy but telling her she needs to stand up for herself is not cool.  Not everyone can do that, V.
  • I’m glad Back-Up is in this episode. All doggie-themed episodes should have Back-Up.
  • “I know you think I hate you but I don’t.  I just can’t stand to look at you.”
  • A long time ago, Mrs. Kane and Keith used to be friends.
  • Is Duncan in Australia?  Nope, not yet.
  • And Logan.  As much as he hates his sister, he still wants to protect her.
  • “No discussing parental PDA at lunch”
  • So many cute dogs in this episode!
  • “Sure, let’s play dirty charades with the Gringa”
  • This episode is very dirtily witty. “Always getting out of the back of some dude’s van.”
  • The guy who plays Dylan is kinda unrecognizable.  He later goes on to play Carlos Rivera on General Hospital. 

  • It’s nice that Aaron is protecting his daughter by kicking this kid’s ass – but he’s still responsible for doing the same things to Logan as he’s accusing his own father of doing to him, so.  Remember the belt?
  • “Do you think Lilly loved Weevil?”  Wow, shit – deep, out-of-the-blue question from Logan.
  • Hey, more kissing!  Glad it’s not just a one-off.  Both Veronica and Logan are confused and delighted and it’s all really cool.
  • Oh no.  I don’t like when Leo loses that smile.  And the only thing that can make that happen is Veronica breaking up with him.  I’m glad she’s being honest with him, though.  She even told him what happened with Logan.
  • “That’s where we keep the dogs with serious contagious diseases.”  That’s a TERRIBLE excuse.
  • Mandy tazes Hans like 5 times.  Once is enough to cause serious damage, though I guess not necessarily on someone who’s 18, but still.  It’s more dangerous than people think.
  • “Can I ask you a weird question?” “Do you ask any other kind of questions?”
  • Aww, Chester/Mandy reunion.

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • The previouslies are reminding us that Veronica made out with two guys last ep
  • She should ... probably do something about that.
  • Awww she's tutoring Weevil. Welcome back, Weevil! We missed you.
  • "He helped me out in the past, I'm just returning the favor." VERONICA RETURNS FAVORS
  • Aw awkward Mandy is reading Judy Blume. Of course she is.
  • Logan and Veronica, meaningful looks, trying not to smile, talking about Duncan's disappearance, everything is awkward
  • just my opinion
  • "You're Veronica Mars, right?" // "Sometimes." It's a joke because of all her aliases. 
  • hahaha "Do I have to tip you over or are you gonna spill it on your own?"
  • Oops Weevil broke into the Kane house. 
  • See, this is the danger with Veronica talking about the case with people who loved Lilly. They alllllll have intense revenge streaks, several of them violent.
  • Aaron Echolls reading Siddhartha. snort
  • Aaron was removed from Lynn's will. Good.
  • Aw the animal shelter guy declares Veronica Mars to be the coolest girl at Neptune High. Also his name is Hans. Also doesn't he turn out to be the bad guy?
  • God I love Logan sometimes. "Would you look at that? There was a string attached to my poptart!"

  • So every shot in the Echolls household this episode has had someone cleaning/working in the background.
  • Veronica Mars, human lightning. Tearing that showerbag [editor's note: look up the french word for shower if you want to see why Zelda likes this as an insult] who's trolling Mandy a new one. But she's not just a marshmallow, she yells at Mandy too, telling her to demand respect.
  • Gasp! Veronica has detected A Pattern. It's not just Chester. Other dogs are missing.
  • Oops Celeste Kane has arrived for a reckoning. But Veronica has ammunition of her own.
  • "I know you think I hate you, but I don't. I just can't stand to look at you." Cool, totally cool.
  • Oops Trina's got a limp and the telltale indoor sunglasses of Abuse Victim
  • And Logan flips from slut shaming to angry protective Echolls
  • Wow Hans is a showerbag. "How old are you, anyway, Hans?" // "18, why?" // "Community soap."
  • Awwww Weevil's out of jail!
  • It's actually pretty interesting, this scene with Aaron and Trina. He sees her putting on the makeup to cover her black eye, comments on it obliquely but doesn't press it. Maybe, being part of an abusive cycle himself, he knows the signs. And the degree of his psychopathy is that he's not gonna go psycho just yet. He'll bank that anger until he can destroy Dylan in person.
  • GUYS THIS WAS OUR CLUE IF WE WEREN'T PICKING IT UP BEFORE. Aaron Echolls is patient, violent, and confident enough in his untouchability that he feels no qualms about beating the absolute shit out of someone.
  • And all while Dean Martin sings to us about Amore.
  • And then he casually greets Logan. "Oh hey, son, how was school?"
  • And at least she's doing right by Leo and breaking up with him rather than cheating on him.
  • But at least it's not an abuse of his position like some of the favors she asks - here he gets to make a bust. "Please, resist arrest. Please."
  • "Can I ask you kind of a weird question?" // "Do you ask any other kinds of questions?"
  • ahhhhhhhhhh my feeeeeeelings Keith is conducting his own DNA test, after Veronica shredded the one she had done without reading it.
  • Awww Mandy got her dog Chester back!


Backup: *runs and tackles dog guy*
Daniel: (laughing, fondly) He just wants kisses.

Veronica: Would it be weird for me to start my own drinking game? Like I have to do a shot every time someone asks for my help?
Zelda: Pot, kettle.

Favorite Lines:

Daniel: "I know you think I hate you, but I don't. I just can't stand to look at you." - Celeste Kane
Zelda: "If I want you to speak, I'll wave a snausage over your nose. If you use Mandy again to try to convince yourself that you're not a loser, I will ruin your life." - Veronica


Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Logan, Weevil (Absent: Duncan)
First Appearance: Mandy, Barry Randall (Echolls family lawyer)
Recurring: Deputy Leo D'Amato, Aaron Echolls, Trina Echolls, Celeste Kane, Lilly Kane
Veronica's Alias: Yorkshire Terrier-owning Bridget; Todd Russell's assistant at CAA

Dead Humans - 0
Backup Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mandy Tases Someone - 1
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - KEITH IS CURIOUS
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Leo Does Veronica a Favor - 1
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Aaron Beats the Shit out of Someone - 1
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 0


  1. "If I want you to speak, I'll wave a snausage over your nose. If you use Mandy again to try to convince yourself that you're not a loser, I will ruin your life." - Veronica

    BEST! Though it always bugged me that she turned around and yelled at Mandy too. It would have been better if she'd suggested it rather than shamed her for not standing up for herself. Still, that line is gold and I love how effortlessly Kristen delivers it.

    Also, poor Kristen, she really can't trust guys named Hans who profess to love her.

    1. Agreed, it's harsher than Mandy deserves, but it's also entirely in character for Veronica. She cuts herself no slack and refuses to understand someone who won't fight as fiercely as she does (see: next episode, M.A.D.)

    2. re: Hans

      gif of Brendan Fraser laughing forever

  2. I hate her turning on Mandy too, I just try to tell myself she was in such a state of fury that it spilled over into her "toughen up" speech.