We Help The Hopeless

Episode 1.04: I Fall to Pieces. Original Airdate: 10.26.99

“Angel aids a woman being stalked by a deranged surgeon who is literally coming apart.”

Zelda’s Thoughts:

• Banter bicker bills and all so we can have a Doyle vision and Cordelia pulls out the phone book to tell Angel where to go. Because this is still the 90s so phone book.
• And as he swoops out majestically with long black coat flowing, Doyle concedes to Cordy, “Maybe I'm a little attracted.” Everyone’s a Little Bit Gay, Doyle.
• Our client of the week, Melissa, is popping pills but why? Who is Ronald and why is his flower gift scaring her? (har har, we know the reason, but hey let’s play along)
• Oh Angel found her. Good job!
• Wow did we not need Cordelia using the word r*tard pejoratively wow did we not need that.
• And back to our creepiness, Andy Umberger changed Melissa’s ATM PIN and like wtf.
• It’s striking me how many of our cases so far have been these awful predatory men who treat women like belongings. Russell in the Pilot, Lenny and Rachel last episode (Lonely Heart was an equal opportunity predator), and now creepo Ronald, stalking his former patient and trying to control her every move. I wish I could say we’ll have less of this as the show goes on, but why kid ourselves.
• It’s just. I’m tired. I’m tired of this being the world.
• Angel: He sees her when he is nowhere around. // Me: He knows when she’s awake, he knows when she’s been bad or good
• And at last the reveal: Creepy Dr. Ronald can detatch body parts at will and send them floating around, and his eyeball is watching Melissa undress.
• Doyle, re: bungee jumping, “Oh I've always meant to do that but I intensely don’t want to.”
• Melissa also has a picture of a doggo on her desk and I want to know why this doggo isn’t in her apartment, chasing down roving body parts and chewing them up like they’re toys.
• Wow, W&H filed a restraining order in defense of creepy Dr. Ronald, they are GREAT
• Kate reminds us “He took her power away and no one can get it back for her but her.” Okay psychologically yes, but we can still help take the creepo out of her life, yes?
• Ewwww, Angel’s in Dr Creepy’s office and he has a framed photo of Melissa on his desk. And he’s claiming she’s his fiancée.
• And a very helpful book for us about the pseudoscience behind his special power.
• So does he count as a human or a not-human, for when we kill him? A human who acquired special skilly powers?
• Cordelia, posing as a journalist, “So he’s good at the cutting and the sewing. He ever strike you as a big dangerous creep?” Cordy at the forefront of the #MeToo movement.
• “Did you steal this book?” // “Yeah.” // “Good.” *snort*
• Gasp! Disembodied hands! As played by noted disembodied hand actor Christopher Hart.

• And those hands are creeping below Melissa’s covers to do naughty things.
• Aaaaaand now they’re throttling a cop.
• And Dr. Creepy has seen Angel with Melissa. Wuh oh.
• Doyle: “At least it was just his hands down there.” Hate to break it to you, Doyle, but hands can rape a body as much as what you’re thinking.
• Dr. Creepy shot a poison dart at Angel and he may be currently incapacitated, but that can’t kill our vampire, now can it?
• Angel’s apartment is effing massive. If I were Cordelia with her tiny place, I’d be angling the “need a roommate?” line right about now.
• I’m gonna miss Glenn Quinn when he’s gone. It’s really such a damn shame.
• And Melissa gets the moment Kate said she needed, taking back her power from Ronald (before Angel disassembles him). And really, he wouldn’t have fallen so completely to pieces without her having said all that.
• Oh, I guess Ronald isn’t technically dead. Just separated into boxes buried all over the place, much like our old smurfy friend The Judge.
• “You guys go ahead, I think I’ll stay here and not burst into flames.”
• The plant Melissa gives Angel, is it the same one that gets destroyed by The First later? I’ll try to remember to pay attention. 

Daniel’s Thoughts:

• Doyle’s kind of a douche.  I mean he’s supposed to be a lovable whatever, but calling Cordelia “Princess”, telling her she doesn’t need “much in the way of clothes.”  It’s pretty gross.  Another Xander nice-guy.  At least Glenn Quinn is more charming.
• Doyle’s visions suck, too.
• Oh man, the dramatic coat thing Angel does. 
• I like that Doyle admits he’s at least a little attracted to Angel.
• The damsel of the week looks familiar but IMDB didn’t tell me anything.  She also stopped working after 2003.  A lot of good 90s actresses I look up stop working in the 2000s.  It’s very sad.  I mean, I’m hoping it was her choice but…
• The thing about Cordelia saying the R word…I mean, I’m absolutely stunned now – but back then?  Who knows if I even gave it a second thought.  I most likely didn’t.  It’s hard sometimes to go back and watch this shit.  Same with Spike being casually homophobic in the last episode.  I probably dismissed that, too. [Same to both. I didn't even clock it back then and now it's such a cringe of why. - Z]
• Meanwhile , our damsel of the week – Melissa – is being stalked by our villain of the week.  That’s…how it works.
• “We help the hopeless.”  Cordelia’s first time saying that!
• Melissa’s British accent is coming out a bit.
• “It’s terrible” “We're going to take care of that” “No, I mean the coffee.” 
• Fun with visual effects!  Surgeon guy can take out his eye…and it can travel on his own, I guess.
• Hey, Kate’s back.  She uncomfortably asks if Angel is there to ask for a favor or a date.  Someone’s thirsty.
• I like these subtle references to the law firm Wolfram & Hart – we don’t know yet that they’ll be a major part of this show.
• I looked up Elisabeth Rohm to see what she’s been up to.  I remember her guesting on Jane the Virgin but it’s nice to see her IMDb page filled with upcoming projects including Bombshell.
• Angel’s pretty good with the undercover.  He’s fast thinking.  He gets doctor creepy to admit things about Melissa.
• He’s not just a stalker, but a delusional stalker….which I guess is kinda redundant.
• Cordelia’s not bad with the undercover either. She slips up a bunch but uses it to her advantage.
• Angel says “All’s he sees.”  All’s. I am judging him.
• Zelda and I are noticing that a lot of the sets are looking like the future Hyperion.
• The guy who plays the hands also played Thing in The Addams Family.
• Oh man, it’s so creepy.
• “You should listen to him, Melissa.  He knows what he’s talking about.  He’s stalked plenty of…books on the subject.”
• I mean as far as supervillain powers goes, it’s not great?  Just kinda creepy.
• Ha, the shot of his ear falling off.  Well done.
• “I didn’t do it for the money.”  Come on, Angel.  People gotta eat.  And by people, I mean your employees.

  

Crossfire!

Cop: Lady, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong!

Z: Don’t yell at the victim!

D: Yes, let her talk! Jesus!

Favorite Lines:

Z:  “So he’s good at the cutting and the sewing. He ever strike you as a big dangerous creep?” - Cordelia

D: "You should listen to him, Melissa. He knows what he’s talking about. He’s stalked plenty of … books on the subject". - Cordelia

Arc/Continuity:

First Appearance: “We help the hopeless”

Recurring: Detective Kate Lockley

Generally Known TV Face: Brent Sexton, Andy Umberger

NOTED HAND ACTOR: Christopher Hart 

Whedonverse Hat Trick: Andy Umberger (D’Hoffryn on Buffy, Dortmunder Captain on Firefly)

Angel’s Alias: Mr. Jensen, husband of woman with an ocular tumor

Cordelia’s Alias: journalist for Journal of Diagnostic Orthoped ... Et Cetera., Jensen International Holdings receptionist

Stats:

Cordelia’s Hair – loosely straight, high ponytail with flyaways, loose bun with headband

Dead Humans – 1

Dead Undeads – 0

Dead Flashbacks – 0

Dead Lawyers – 0

Doyle Has a Vision – 1

Lawyered Ex Machina – 1 (Dr. Roland's restraining order)

Evil Reveal – 0

Unevil Reveal – 0

Shenanigans Called – 0

Apocalypse Called – 0

Prophecy Called – 0