PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Tuesday, May 1, 2018

Maternal Expletive

"Boo, you whore"
Episode 2.06: Rat Saw God. Original Airdate 11.09.05

"Veronica is shocked when a dying Abel Koontz shows up asking for her help in finding his missing daughter before he dies. Meanwhile, Logan is reunited with his father when he is arrested for Felix's murder, and Keith waits for the results of the election."

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • Wallace is still AWOL :( and Keith is gonna lose the election :( :(
  • And Cliff is drinking and we don't blame him.
  • Dr. Tom Griffith has arrived to claim to be the anonymous caller from the bridge. It's no accident that it's absolutely not the same actor from the original flashback.
  • Dick's first episode back since his father skipped town and he's surprisingly cool about Logan shtupping his stepmom. But then, it's Dick.
  • TV Anchor: "city supervisor, or the position historically referred to as the mayor" and I DIE LAUGHING at the writers room trying to retcon their mistake.
  • "The best thing for the investigation would have been a competent sheriff." Veronica's not wrong, Keith.
  • Gia, don't hook up with Dick. Don't please don't.
  • And Logan's getting arrested for murdering Felix. Again. Isn't that a double jeopardy thing?
  • And Sacks walks right past an eighteen year old Duncan toting bottles of alcohol and does nothing because the Neptune police are actually worse than the Sunnydale police
  • Abel Koontz is back!
  • Shit, his daughter Amelia is missing. I remember how this turns out, and it sucks.
  • Ah yes, the episode where everyone pronounces Ibiza differently.
  • Cliff! Hi Cliff! He's here to represent Logan. "Having me represent you doesn't make you look innocent, it makes you look like an arrogant jackass."
  • Veronica and Cliff batting back and forth past favors is beyond delightful.
  • And then Logan enjoying Cliff's distraught father routine. Although his smile falls when he realizes this is a favor for Veronica.
  • Wow, Lamb really is awful. Putting Logan in a cell with his dad. That's fucking irresponsible, knowing how volatile both of them can be.
  • "I don't expect any sympathy from you." "That's good."
  • Wow Aaron is trying to pin Lilly's murder on Duncan.
  • "So you tried to kill another girl - also a girlfriend of mine - what, to maintain your innocence?"
  • Yeah see I will NEVER understand how he will be allowed to walk free - even if he got off for Lilly's murder - after his attempt to murder both Keith and Veronica.
  • Hiiiii Clarence Wiedman! He walks into his office, where Veronica is seated at his desk with her feet up. "What are you the head of again?"
  • Dick's locker says "DICK!" 
Pictured here: Dick

  • Aw shit, I forgot the PCHers set Logan's house on fire, in anger over his release from prison.
  • Hi Joss Whedon.
  • "This routine used to be a tag team effort" we miss Wallace, too
  • snort Joss in the background, yelling at an America's Next Top Model: "Okay, I'm here? I'm double me. There's two of me!"
  • Veronica really is a master manipulator: first flattering Joss's petty ego, then playing to ANTM's resentment at a patronizing coworker. And she gets information from both of them.
  • "I hope your boss gets canned." // "Yours too."
  • Man I hate when Keith is disappointed in Veronica. It makes everything hurt.
  • And then she fakes an art gallery with her hotel room which has a LOT of art for $30 a night.
  • RIP Amelia DeLongpre
  • Oh right, there's the fakeout with which boy is in the photo with Amelia, right?
  • In Keith's confrontation with Aaron, Aaron said he was going to let Keith do all the talking, then Aaron did all the talking after all. Typical actor.
  • Oh but damn. "I came all the way out here just to show how easily I can get to you," in a room with no guard and he'll swear he wasn't there.
  • Oh good, Logan's back to being racist to Weevil. Awesome.
  • In revenge for getting his house burned down, Logan bought Weevil's grandma's house and is now evicting her.
  • And Clarence is going to exact not-legal revenge on Amelia's murderer.
  • So Veronica lies to a dying Abel, telling him Amelia is on her way, and that she's happy.
  • Wheeeeeee Duncan and Logan are awkward roomies now at the hotel.
  • And speaking of not-legal, Keith's broken into the holding area for the recovered bus, to look for clues, which is where we'll finally understand the episode's title: a dead rat taped to the bottom of a bus seat, the cause of the stink which prompted Dick to hail a limo for the ride home.

Daniel's Thoughts:

  • It’s the night of the election.  And it looks like Lamb is going to win. This is giving me flashbacks to the 2016 election. [Too soon. - Z]
  • Meanwhile Dick confronts Logan.  And by ‘confronts’, I mean he says it’s okay because he had the hots for Logan’s mom.  So….even?  I guess that’s one of the pluses of having Dick as a friend.  He can’t judge because he’s even pervier than you will ever be.
  • And Don Lamb wins.  That sucks.
  • There’s that moral thingy
  • So Dick, Logan & Duncan are all rich boys who’s parents don’t look after them and are now living alone. I think they’re all 18 now or at least that’s what they’re gonna tell us – but Beav is not.  Does that mean Dick is Beav’s legal guardian?
  • Hey!  Abel Koontz is back!
  • I hate Lamb’s stupid douchey face.
  • Drunk Tara Reid reference – must be the early 2000s.
  • Aww, Cliff is Logan’s new attorney.
  • “Having me represent you doesn’t make you look innocent, it makes you look like an arrogant jackass”
  • Cliff is so awesome.  I love that he’s doing Veronica a favor.
  •   Veronica uses AOL.  I’m so emailing that next time I need help with a case.
  • Amelia’s back in Neptune? Le Gasp.
  • What is Aaron doing in a local lock-up? Weird Lamb play.
  • Aaron is still claiming that Duncan killed Lilly.  Geez.  I don’t believe you, Aaron Echolls, and neither does Logan.  You don’t, do you Logan?
  • Veronica in Clarence Wiedman’s office, “What are you the head of again?” Heh.
  • How does Weevil have so many tattoos at 18.  (Cause he’s actually 30)
  • Hey, it’s Joss Whedon.  I love how all these writers wanted to cameo on this show.
  • And another one of those models.
  • Poor Keith. He wants so hard to do good, but to do it, he has to go through this douchebag (Lamb.)
  • She just spent $90 on three awful motel rooms.
  • And oops, there’s Amelia deLongrpre…but not the actress who played her.  Dead dead deadski.
  • It’s nice when Wiedman and Veronica are working together.
  • Keith is really good at playing protective dad.
  • Hey a Martha Stewart jail joke – must be early 2000s
  • Ugh, the Logan/Dick racism.  It continues.  No matter how much I want to like Logan, that always comes backs.
  • Veronica asks the nurse about Abel Koontz who tells her he has a day or two.  SHENANIGANS.  He doesn’t even ask her if she’s family.  He can’t discose that information.
  • I love this 90s/2000s Banana Republic/H&M wardrobe.  It’s totally what I wore back then.  
I'm pretty sure I owned Logan's shirt.

Melodie's Thoughts:

  • Wallace is gone, Keith lost the election and Logan has been arrested for Felix’s murder, how could things get any worse?
  • Answer: Abel Koontz turning up drunk to ask for Veronica’s help. 
  • It’s weird though, he’s creepy and gross, and not that great but I actually feel bad for Abel and I feel worse because I remember what happened to Amelia. 
  • Both Logan and Lamb try to flex their machoness but unfortunately, Lamb wins the tough-off. He’s going to label Logan a flight risk so he can’t get bail.
  • Veronica takes the case and starts by tracking down Amelia’s boyfriend. He hasn’t seen her though. 
  • Her friend is surprised she went since Amelia isn’t really that type of girl.
  • Logan sasses Cliff which, as much as I love Logan, is completely uncalled for. Cliff is awesome and he needed to be used in the show more.
  • Cliff is basically like, you’re a jackass for not using your money to get a good attorney and the Echolls name won’t get you anywhere anymore, thanks to MurderyDaddy
  • Watching Cliff and Veronica banter and then him cave and do her a favour while Logan watches is hilarious.
  • The calling cards reveal that Amelia was in Neptune in the last week, so she did return from Ibiza.
  • Ew, Aaron is in the holding cell with Logan. Super contrived but believable that Lamb would be that big of a jackass.
  • YES! Logan calls out Aaron for banging his girlfriend and then bashing her head in, it’s small but needed to be said.
  • Aaron is trying to blame Duncan for Lilly’s death. We all know the truth, Aaron. Stop trying to throw a pity party for yourself.
  • Cliff proves how good he is by getting Logan bailed out. Cliff is awesome and Logan is finally recognizing.
  • Veronica confronts Clarence Wiedman about Amelia making a call from a payphone across the street from his office.
  • I love the fact that as intimidating as Wiedman is, Veronica still sasses him when he threatens to call security.
  • Weevil is threatening Logan’s life for killing Felix to Duncan and Dick.
  • Dick makes a disgustingly racist comment…why does he continuously get a pass for being horrible?
  • Weevil’s friends complain that Logan made bail and that they should have taken care of him months ago. Something always made me laugh about how crushed the one goon is that his little brother asked him if PCH stood for Panty Club for Homos. Like, he’s so hurt and it’s such a weak ass insult that I just start laughing uncontrollably.
  • Duncan and Dick talking about fake IDs which gives Veronica and idea about how to track Amelia.
  • She finds out she got a fake ID as Margot Schnell and finally gets some information on her.
  • Lamb is driving Logan home but it looks like Weevil and his gang burned it down, whoops.
  • Veronica asks Joss Whedon for help with finding Margot’s car rental.
  • Given what we know about Joss now…the fact that he’s flirting with Veronica is just all kinds of ick. Yeah, I know it’s fictional flirting but still…
  • Joss isn’t helpful so Veronica returns when another employee is in and plays the “isn’t that guy a jerk, card?” which works and it’s pretty funny.
  • Keith confronts Lamb about if he found anything about the bus. Lamb is a jackass, as per usual and pushes his buttons about Veronica. Bringing up the guy with her name written on her hand.
  • Veronica goes to the last place Amelia’s car was and it’s a shady motel. The creepy guy shows her the room but she has to pay, because he’s creepy and shady.
  • Keith calls Veronica and demands to know where she is. Veronica lies again and Keith calls her out, asking for a photo and then brings up the dead guy.
  • I’m crushed, I hate it when Keith and Veronica hurt each other, even if it’s because Veronica didn’t want him to worry.
  • She confesses what she knows and that she’s worried the bus crash was her fault and that everyone died because of her.
  • Veronica’s Bluetooth is picking up Amelia’s palm pilot, I remember when those were a thing. Veronica checks out the rooms beside her and has to keep paying $30 for each room.
  • Just when she thinks there’s nothing, she checks the ice machine and finds Amelia’s body stuffed inside. Clarence Wiedman also shows up so shit just hit the fan.
  • Clarence isn’t the one that killed her. Amelia wanted more money.
  • Creepy motel guy finally fesses up that Amelia was there with a guy, possibly her boyfriend.
  • Keith visits Aaron at the jail about Veronica. Keith is a badass. No one messes with his daughter and he threatens Aaron that he’ll come after him if anything happens to Veronica.
  • Clarence bursts into Amelia’s boyfriends room and manhandles him to get answers. Not Veronica’s style and she’s panicking but it’s just an act. Boyfriend didn’t do it.
  • Weevil confronts Logan and damnit, Logan is a racist shit to him too. Why are rich white boys so awful? I like you Logan but stop.
  • It turns out that Logan bought Weevil’s grandmother’s house and is evicting them for burning down his house. Fights ensue.
  • Veronica gets contacted about Amelia. The girl has a picture of her with a group of people including her boyfriend but whoops, the boyfriend we know is not the boyfriend she knows.
  • Veronica gives Clarence the name of the guy who was with Amelia but he’s a diplomats son, so he’ll just be extradited back to Argentina.
  • Unfortunately, it sounds like Clarence is going to off the guy so Veronica might have just kind of put a hit out on someone.
  • The scene where Veronica tells Abel about how happy Amelia is, hiking in the Himalayas is heartbreaking. This episode always makes me sad and it’s not like we really knew Amelia or liked Abel but damnit, the man loved his daughter and no parent should have to hear that their child has died so this always hurts me to watch, even if she lied to give him a moment of peace before he died.
  • Veronica goes to cuddle with Duncan but whoops, it’s actually Logan. She’s horrified but girl, he’s way hotter even if he’s a dick right now. Logan and Duncan are now living together.
  • Keith breaks in to the bus to investigate himself because Lamb is useless.
  • We end the episode on Keith finding a dead rat. Gross.
Logan: Just get me the first sober public defender you find in the hall.
Z: But Cliff is drunk!

Favorite Lines:
Z: "Cliff, come on, you owe me." // "I owe you? Who unconfiscated all your fake college IDs?" // "Who got the Lincoln out of your ex's name?" // "Well, who helped put that lien against Lee's Wok and Donut?" // "And who proved that stripper was color-blind?" // "Okay, who am I calling and what am I giving them?" - Veronica & Cliff
“Having me represent you doesn’t make you look innocent, it makes you look like an arrogant jackass” - Cliff

Neptune Roll Call: Duncan, Logan, Weevil, Dick (Absent: Wallace, Beaver, Jackie)
First Appearance: Dr. Tom Griffith, Thumper
Recurring: Clifff McCormack, Sheriff Don Lamb, Gia Goodman, Deputy Jerry Sacks, Abel Koontz, Dawn, Aaron Echolls, Clarence Wiedman, Hector
Already Famous Person: Joss Whedon
America's Next Top Model: Kim Stolz as Stacy
Veronica's Alias: Margot Schnell's friend, colleague of a jerkface (both looking for info on the white LeSabre at the car rental)
Cliff's Alias: Amelia's distraught father

Dead Humans - 1
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 0
Keith Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Cliff Does Veronica a Favor - 1
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 1 ("So, no hard feelings?" // "No, she gave me a few.")
Shenanigans Called - 1


  1. Logan (and Dick obviously) racism is awful obviously..but it is not so much racism than a way to stick it to Weevil..And why Weevil get a pass for THREATENING TO KILL Logan, BURNING HIS HOUSE ect ??..far worse than some racial insults..imo (although racism is awful obviously).

    1. Listen, none of us think setting someone's house on fire (or buying someone's grandma's house and evicting her) is a cool move. They're both utterly shitteous moves. But there's a distinction between a personal and cruel act of rage and contributing to a systemic abuse and suppression of an entire ethnicity while basically flashing your white privilege card and moonwalking away. That's why we're getting angrier about this.

      Also because the show has these characters being casually racist ALL THE TIME and doesn't really call them out nearly enough, whereas it clearly thinks setting houses on fire is totally uncool.

  2. I ADORE the V/Cliff banter and the moment Logan realises who Cliff is talking to!

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