Is That What the Kids Call Motorboating?

Episode 2.16: The Rapes of Graff. Original Airdate 3.29.06

"While accompanying Wallace to Hearst College, Veronica runs into her ex-boyfriend Troy. The next day, Troy is accused of raping a girl on campus and then shaving her head, and Veronica reluctantly agrees to help him. Meanwhile, Keith helps Cliff with a personal problem involving a prostitute, and Logan makes a decision regarding his relationship with Hannah."

Zelda's Thoughts:

• Mayor Woody Goodman is having an essay writing contest because contrivance
• Logan finally blackmailed Dr. Tom enough to get his case dismissed
• Come on, Veronica, give in to destiny. You know you're going to go to Hearst if the show gets a third season. You know it, Wallace knows it, and the American People know it.
• And Logan breaks up with Hannah and we're all sad.
• Hi there George Michael Bluth.
• GASP IT'S TROY VANDERGRAFF
• who is apparently sober and less shady now. or so he claims. shrug?
• Madison Sinclair is dating someone "more mature" than Dick, but since I know it's Sheriff Lamb, I'd like to challenge that assessment.
• V: *throws a beer in a toolbag's face* Toolbag: Yeah, tell me how you like it *aims another beer* V: *tips his beer into his face again*
• Hi there Maeby Funke
• Oh shit V just tased the toolbag.
• Oh Cliffffffff what have you done why are you handcuffed and stranded in a hotel bed
• Someone raped Maeby Funke and the police think it's Troy. But it's too early in the episode for it to be him.
• Aw shit someone stole Cliff's case files about Logan
• LAMB AND MADISON MAKING OUT.

• I guess she's probably 18 now, so it's not illegal, it's just gross.
• Hannah slipped a file into the get out of jail cake she made for Logan. Logan's feeling shitty about himself, as he should.
• Veronica to Maeby: "It's just gonna suck, and then it'll suck less."
• Christ. The rapist left a box of hair outside Maeby's door. But it's not even her hair.
• V to the wig shop lady: "Please, ma'am, she's my sister." // "I'm sorry, this girl was Hawaiian." // "Oh." *leaves*
• "I don't know if you get points for being sassy, but yeah."
• Gross. The frat house has a pantie board, and that toolbag from before is claiming he nailed Veronica.
• V found another victim of the headshaving rapist, and it happened before Troy was anywhere near campus, which exonerates him.
• But also there's a serial rapist running around campus, and knowing the future, this is gonna keep being a problem through next season that continues to not be dealt with. At least she's getting that frat put on probation for the semester.
• Wallace "See if you come here next year, you've already got enemies. Just feel right at home." That's actually the most enticing thing one could say.
• I ... actually forgot that Logan apologized to Hannah and made up with her.
• "Dad, your hooker's here." "Escort, honey."
• Oh right, then Dr. Tom comes and breaks them up and ships her off forever. Bye Hannah I guess?
• V: "What do you know about plastic explosives?" // Keith: "Well, that's what I like: a good segue."
• Aw yay Wallace got his scholarship.
• V, undercover as a pink garbed blondie, finds out the construction site where they're demolishing the stadium has the same C4 that blew up the bus and was found at Terrence Cook's hangar. And Danny Boyd works there.

Daniel's Thoughts:

• Hey, an essay contest to be Mayor Pedo’s (spoilers) assistant.
• Wallace is not very approving of Logan.
• Don’t worry, you’ll all get into (fake) Hearst college that happens to be in (fake) Neptune.
• And Poor Hannah.  She’s just a rube in all this.  Poor naïve Hannah.
• Hey, special guest star Michael Cera.  And he’s actually pretty funny.  And also pretty much playing college level George Michael.
• Oh hey, it’s Troy.    I love the Ashmore twins!
• Madison and Dick are on the outs again.  I can so see their future in 20 years – him cheating, her drinking. [both of them hooking up with barely-legals -Z]
• Ugh, this college dude is so awful.
• Veronica can take care of herself.  The throwing of the drink and then…making him throw another one on himself.  So good.
• And Alia Shawkat! Maybe…  I don’t remember ever seeing her have such long and straight hair.  It looks strange, but good. 
• Aww, Cliff is in trouble.  Keith’s coming to bail him out.
• I guess that was a wig Alia was wearing…
• Could Troy Vandergraff be innocent? GASP
• Oh gross, Lamb is hooking up with Madison.  I feel like it happens often in tv shows.  The thing is, in real life High School girls look like high school girls.  On TV, they’re played by 25 year olds so it seems better than it is?
• Troy: Maybe you can just believe me.  I mean why should she after you so talentedly lied to her many times in the past?
• Dick’s wearing a t-shirt that says, “Screw with my head”. 

I don't think it'd be too difficult

• Weird part?  Alia actually looks pretty good with a shaved head.
• The music behind Veronica’s totally fake sob story at the wig shop.  It’s so old school soap opera music and it’s wonderful.
• "This Girl was Hawaiian."  "Oh."

• How convenient that Wallace passes by and unlocks the window that Veronica needs to break in to.
• Veronica needs to find a Hawaiian girl…so she finds the Hawaiian club. Okay.
• So Veronica solved the hair rape case…for now.
• SHENANIGANS.  Alia is walking a dog.  Why does she have a dog?....in a dorm?
• SHENANIGANS. Also why does Veronica have so many bags if she stayed at home the other night?
• I really don’t understand why Hannah is so enthralled with Logan. He’s been pretty awful. But…that’s relationships.  A lot of young relationships, at that.

Favorite Lines:

Zelda: 

Daniel: "Dad, your hooker's here." "Escort, honey." - Veronica/Keith

Arc/Continuity:

Neptune Roll Call: Wallace, Logan, Dick (Absent: Duncan, Weevil, Beaver, Jackie)
First Appearance: Chip Diller, Drew, Foreman
Recurring: Mrs. Murphy, Hannah Griffith, Troy Vandergraff, Cliff McCormack, Sheriff Don Lamb, Madison Sinclair, Dr. Tom Griffith, Danny Boyd
Already Famous Person: Michael Cera, Alia Shawkat

Stats:

Dead Humans - 0
Backup Sighting - 0
Veronica Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 1
Mac Hacks - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 1
Veronica Wants a Pony - 0
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres - 0
Shenanigans Called - 2
VERONICA WAS RIGHT - 0
VERONICA WAS WRONG - 0