PLEASE NOTE: THIS IS A SPOILER-RICH ZONE. If your diet requires you to dine on television spoiler-free ... good luck with that.


Tuesday, July 30, 2019

Hu Done It?

Episode 4.1: Spring Break Forever. Original Airdate: 7.19.19

"Panic spreads through Neptune when a bomb goes off during spring break. Veronica and Keith are hired by the wealthy family of one victim injured in the bombings to find out who is responsible." 

Note: We apologize for the late start.  We thought we planned this perfectly, but Hulu pulled a fast one!  
Note #2: Something about spoilers and lack thereof. 

Zelda's Thoughts:

  • HERE. WE. GO.
  • “Then after a decade away, I decided Neptune needed me. And I needed it. I was wrong on both counts. Neptune didn’t need another private investigator. It needed an enema.” Uh oh.
  • Listen, so long as she doesn’t try to run for Sheriff, I'm sure we'll all be fine, right? Right?
  • The Maloof Case? That’s a … what’s that?
  • So far, I like that the season is clearly setting itself up to be a long arc, like season one was. TV’s changed a lot since VM first aired, and serialized stories (thanks to bingeing) are much more common than before.
  • Holy heck, a crane shot. They got moneyyyyyyyys.
  • Aw these writers are such dolls. Veronica isn’t getting buzzed through to visit her client, so they give us our first stat of the season: Veronica breaks in.
  • Also she’s already cuddling up the guard dog.
  • Ooooh Veronica smash.
  • Veronica’s first client Karsyn seems a bad enough actor that I’m wondering if she’s a stunt cast. (Nope, Internet tells me she's real. I guess I just don't like her delivery?)
  • “You’re saying there’s nothing I can do?” // “I didn’t say that. I never say that.”
  • Oh hey new cover of the theme song!
  • Omg they finally got around our Roll Call/Absent tracker! There are only three regular cast members: Veronica, Keith, and Logan. All right then. Guess we can delete that tracker ...
  • Wow naked dude butt.
  • V’s face when her client complains that her ex only wanted to pay her 90k a month in alimony. My face too, booboo. So she ups her fee from 300 a day to 300 an hour.
  • Keith’s got a cane. I guess he hasn't bounced back from the car accident fully yet.
  • “Holy cuss.” Keith and V have a bet to see who can go the longest without saying fuck, and I’m cackling at this workaround since it’s no longer a high school show, but also they don’t want to leap headfirst into Rated R territory, I assume. Then again, see above re: naked dude butt.
  • Uh oh. Keith is having brain freeze with his client. And the time he takes to recover from that moment … I am worried. DON’T TAKE AWAY PAPA MARS.
  • “Who else is gonna keep paying for those safaris where you and your big-shot friends hunt the most dangerous game of all: the homeless.” – Veronica
  • “How I made that is between me and my maker.” // “I’m your maker!”
  • “What’s a tape deck.” Pshhhhhh V you’re around my age. I had a tape deck.
  • Also Logan is a series regular but he’s not in this episode? I’m cackling.
  • Neptune United for a Tiny Town. Wow wow wow.
  • HI PONY.
  • Daniel and I weren’t able to watch this episode together but I’m assuming he was very excited about our new doggo.
  • Oh nm, Logan’s surprise home after all.
  • V in her leather jacket and black and white striped shirt is not blending with the brightly-if-scantily-clad spring break partiers.
  • Snort. V and Logan flirting/propositioning in front of two unsuspecting random chicks who were checking him out.
I accept the eye candy.

  • Aw, they gave us an old fashioned spin while the two make out.
  • Wow no cursing but so much sexing.
  • Wait what. Logan casually proposes and V brushes it off. OH BUT THERE IS A RING.
  • Oh damn but he’s ready to propose for real and she stops him. She’s using their parents' divorces, the broken couples she works for, as excuses, and she leaves.
  • Okay, we found our relationship angst of the season.
  • Okay so he wants to Make Neptune Great Again
  • “Logan’s back.” “Logan’s back?” “And he asked me to marry him.” “What an asshole.”
  • Yayyyyyy it’s that awesome chick from The Good Place! Her shirt says Get Your Duck Wet and I love her a super high amount already.
  • Hmmm unseen girl pouring shots into open mouths. I’m assuming the fact that we didn’t see her face means she’ll end up being a person of interest.
  • Oh look, a girl is passed out and a guy is taking advantage.
  • But Nicole (aka Kirby Howell-Baptiste from The Good Place) is OFFICIALLY OUR NEW BEST FRIEND because unlike everyone who saw and ignored what happened to Veronica at Shelly Pomeroy’s party, Nicole won’t let it happen, and puts the harrassers on the 86 list (while also socking them because hero).
  • Aw Keith and his massive box of organized meds and his PT. And his barely-paying-attention physical therapist. Wow what a dick.

  • “Are you cussing with me?” // “Don’t you cussing point at me.” I love me my Marses. But is Keith gonna tell Veronica the truth? Nope. NOW I AM MAD AT HALF OF MY MARSES. (though it's clear V knows he's keeping something back from her)
  • V calls out Keith for taking jobs that can’t sustain the business, Keith points out that V has a law degree she’s not using. And we avoid.
  • Wow random law student spring breaker trying to steal someone’s pizza, but PATTON OSWALT THE PIZZA MAN WILL NOT FALL FOR IT. And he’s working for Cho’s Pizza, which is a nice callback.
  • Gosh the 6 in 26 is broken and reads as 29. I wonder if that will be significant.
  • It's also weird/frustrating knowing that most VM fans have already binged the season and are therefore reading our blog with more knowledge than us. I feel like Mark Oshiro.
  • Oh wait law student spring breaker is the douche that Nicole Malloy stopped from assaulting the unconscious girl. So many people in this motel lobby are garbage.
  • And the garbage go boom.
  • Well, shit, the motel proprietor dad wasn’t garbage. But ugh.
  • The four dead: Sullivan Ross (motel dad), Gabriel Flores (one of our new nerd crew, whom Keith identifies as a Mexican national going to Cal Tech, so I assume there will be some connection to the two guys in the car in Mexico who shot third guy who was in the trunk), James Hatfield (law student douche), and Tawny Carr (the fiancée of Alex Maloof, which I guess is why V called this the Maloof Case? He must be who hires the Marses).
  • And a hot lawyer wife.
  • It’s actually nice to see Wallace and Logan being friendly, but it shows we've missed much character development. That being said: I'd rather there be character development that I missed, than take ten years off and return to NO character development *coughGilmorecough*
  • CLIFF MY MAN doing rounds at the hospital as smooth as can be

  • Ah he’s here to see our Pizza Man Patton Oswalt, who ignores him because he’s on the phone, and the blonde who brought the makeup bag to Tawny before the bomb.
  • Hot damn, Chief of Police Langdon seems actually competent and I’m dying.
  • Ah, Alex Maloof has lost his hand. So we have four casualties and several serious injuries.
  • “Look, whenever I don’t know what to do next, I opt for suing someone.”
  • Ah and Congressman Maloof (brother to Alex) doesn’t like the Chief of Police even though she doesn’t seem like an idiot, so Cliff sends him to Mars Investigations.
  • The Maloofs are wealthy so V keeps the same rate she gave her client earlier: 300 an hour PLUS 5000 retainer.
  • Yep, down in Mexico, we reveal that Gabriel the nerd is the nephew of someone named Oscar.
  • So our organized crime player now is no longer the Fitzpatricks; we’ve got a Mexican cartel instead. Because Oscar is El Despiadado.
  • Aw shit a head in a bag interrupts a football game. Ain’t that always the way? Oh, it’s the guy who was in the car with Alonzo, our friend from Westworld.
  • Veronica claims Logan is unfazed by the marriage proposal rejection and uh. I don’t think that’s true.
  • Veronica and Keith at the crime scene, scoping the survivors of the Sea Sprite Bombing.
  • “I’d like to think I would have walked away if we didn’t need the money. Knowing what I know now? I wish I had. But there was a girl, and I started to care about the girl. And if you know anything about what I do, that’s never good.”

Daniel’s Thoughts:

  • Wow, we’re back and sooner than expected.
  • Veronica narrates, pretty much summing up her struggle to get out of Neptune (the series), and the need to come back (the movie).
  • Apparently, there’s a “mad bomber’
  • This isn’t the first time we’ve seen or heard about spring break in Neptune.  As I recall, it was the setting of one of Rob Thomas’ Veronica Mars books.
  • And already we have our first stat: “Veronica Breaks in”.  She’s climbing over a fence.
  • Oh hey, it’s whatsherface:  Eliza Coupe as Veronica’s first client of season 4.  Veronica’s helping her figure out how her ex-husband keeps getting in.  The problem is the router – he set it up, so he knows all the passwords.  Mac could have helped with this. [Who? This show has only ever had one female regular. - The Writers]
  • Veronica’s just going around breaking stuff looking for cameras.
  • Oh man, the theme song is the same verse, different artist and style.  Female sung with a little jazz.  It’s kinda perfect.
  • So here are the listed stars: Kristen, Keith, Logan,  AND THAT’S IT.  Wow.  They finally did it.  The show only had three stars in the first three seasons.  Veronica, Keith & Logan were the only ones in every episode in season 3.  It’s about time they admitted that. Everyone else is just a guest star.  Sorry Weevil & Wallace.
  • I kind of love the end of this case.  Veronica’s helped the ex-wife get back at her husband by using ingenious gadgets and ideas and Eliza Coupe wants her to change a battery in the smoke detector….  Still treated like the help.  Is this why you came back Veronica?
  • Meanwhile, Keith is on another case…and using a cane.  Good continuity from the movie where he was in a bad car accident.
  • “Holy Cuss” – heh.
  • I love this bet between Veronica and Keith not to drop the F-bomb.  You can, though! You’re no longer on network tv.
  • And poor Keith.  It’s more than just the cane.  He seems to be having memory problems which is really worrying. 
  • And Keith is looking really old too.
  • But the banter is still alive with these two.
  • “What’s a tapedeck?” “I hate you.”
  • Hu Done It?
  • Awww, Veronica got a new dog and his name is Pony!  VERONICA FINALLY GOT A PONY.  I’m pretty sure Rob Thomas wrote that just for us.  Us and our…ten followers.

  • Veronica lives across from the beach.  Nice, except it’s right in the middle of spring break so not so nice.
  • Logan comes out of the water like a Bond Girl and dayam he looks good.

  • “I’m gonna cuss your brains out.” – I mean, it’s no ‘fork’ but still funny.

  • I’m surprised the beach bunnies didn’t recognize Logan.
  • Oh my, it’s getting steamy. No nudity, but I don’t think they could have gotten away with that on network TV.
  • Logan: “Let’s get married”
  • But Veronica doesn’t want to get married and she has good, if cliched reasons.  She leaves Logan dejected.
  • Veronica & Keith go to the town hall.  Keith fills us in on some stuff that’s been happening in Neptune.  Apparently a Real Estate tycoon has come to Neptune to try to make it better, I guess. Oh.  That tycoon is former prison inmate Dick Sr.
  • “And he asked me to marry him.”  “What an asshole”
  • And here is Kirby Howell-Baptiste – who is currently working with Kristen Bell in The Good Place which - if you're not watching already, why not?
  • She’s arguing against Dick Sr., so Veronica (and I) already like her.
Does this count for our stats?

  • I’m glad we’re spending time with these characters before we introduce the big mystery arc.  We need to catch up with them.
  • Oh man, spring break looks the worst.  Kirby is there as the owner of this bar full of shitstains.  Some drunk passed out girl is being harassed and Kirby takes care of it, punching the guy out.
  • And this den of geeks play a game to see who can get rejected the most.  Sounds fun.
  • Meanwhile in Tijuana – two guys in a car, with blood all over them. Another guy is in the trunk.
  • Wow, these guys get past the police by mentioning their boss.  Even with a guy banging in the trunk of their car.
  • The guy in the car gets shot in the desert – our first fatality of the season.
  • But what’s this got to do with the series?
  • Poor Keith is taking all the meds, and doing physical therapy with some douche trainer who is more interested in his phone. (According to IMDB, it's Jonathan Chesner who played Corny in the original series) [I TOTALLY MISSED THAT HOLY SHIT THIS SHOW - Z]
  • Veronica is setting up the camera at Hu’s Grocery store.  And then Veronica and Keith have more Cuss banter.  I can see this getting old, but so far…it hasn't.
  • Keith and Veronica are talking money.  I’m sure it has a lot to do with Keith’s injury.  He can’t do as much as he used to.  Good thing Veronica got six grand out of Eliza Coupe.
  • “You could do something with that law degree.”  Keith’s still on that…  Give it up, Keith.  Veronica is meant to be a PI.
  • Some girl is complaining to her dad about the cinnamon in the coffee.  My parents do that, and I too, complain.  It’s an old people thing:  It’s supposed to be anti-inflammatory.
  • Patton Oswalt is a pizza guy.  This guy can do anything.
  • We’re back to the den of geeks in their beach motel room.  I wonder who won their contest.
  • And some ‘bros’ talking law.  Ugh.  One of em is the guy who was harassing the drunk girl the previous night.  You can tell because of the shiner.
  • All these people we’ve met are conveniently in the motel office…  Along with one of the girls we met last night that rejected the geek who….is also there.
  • And this rich asshole, a congressman’s brother, with his girlfriend who want to leave the motel to go to the Neptune Grande and are asking for their money back.
  • I wonder what’s going to happen.  I have to admit, though, even though I can see it coming, they’re setting it up spectacularly.  I mean, we did have that opening where Veronica was taking pictures of this place – so it wouldn’t be a complete surprise anyway.
  • At least they made an excuse to get the kid out of there.   But as soon as Patton Oswalt leaves, KABOOM. – 4 Dead.
  • Hey, it’s Wallace!  Wallace has a nice house.  AND HE HAS A KID.  Noah is less than a year old, so he didn’t have him during the movie.
  • His wife, Shae, is unknown to me so we didn’t see her in the movie.  She seems to be a lawyer – but that’s all we learn about her.  She does mention Wallace’s mom which is cool.  I wonder if we’ll ever see Wallace’s grown up brother.
  • Veronica is trying to use Logan as an excuse to leave, which is weird.  But he wants to stay.  Logan and Wallace have grown up.
  • Cliff!!!  He’s hilariously trolling the hospital looking for clients.
  • There’s Patton Oswalt.  He made it through the KABOOM, but is hurt.
  • Hey, it’s Dawnn Lewis as a cop in Neptune. She says she’s the new chief of police.  Has that position replaced the sheriff?
  • The congressman, whose brother is in the hospital, is approached by Cliff.  He, of course, has a suggestion of some private investigators they can hire.
  • Mars Investigations is looking more like the old tv series than what it looked like in the movie.
  • The congressman is happy to throw some money at the Marses.  Keith is wary of taking the case but Veronica encourages him – and also makes sure the Maloofs know their expensive quotes.
  • Ok, we’re back in Mexico for some reason.  And we meet the big boss.  I’m assuming these are the new Fitzpatricks.  As if we needed new Fitzpatricks.  “El Despiadado” is what they call him, which translates to “The Merciless”.  Oooh.
  • Holy crap.  While the kids are playing ‘football’, someone throws a head over the wall.
  • So this is how it’s all connected.  One of the victim’s in the blast was El Despiadado’s ex-wife’s nephew.  So now these guys are headed to Neptune.

Favorite Lines:

Zelda: “Who else is gonna keep paying for those safaris where you and your big-shot friends hunt the most dangerous game of all: the homeless.” - Veronica
Daniel: "What's a tape deck?" "I hate you" - Veronica/Keith


Neptune Roll Call: Only Veronica, Keith & Logan are in the opening c
First Appearance: Alonzo Lozano, Nicole Malloy, Dodie Mendoza, Daniel Maloof, Marcia Langdon, Penn Epner, Matty Ross, Amalia Maloof, Alex Maloof, Simon, Loyd, Mayor Mark Dobbins, Craig, Andy, Bob Sargent, Shae Fennel, Noah Fennel
Recurring: Cho's Pizza, Wallace Fennel, Cliff McCormack, Richard Casablancas Sr. 
Generally Known TV Face: Eliza Coupe, Mark L. Young, Rudy Martinez, Francois Chau, Brad Morris, Clifton Collins Jr.
Already Famous: Patton Oswalt, Alanna Ubach
Fun Fact:  The physical therapist is played by Jonathan Chesner who was Corny in the regular series. [I'm willing to consider this a recurring appearance until proven otherwise - Z]


Dead Humans - 5
The bombing victims
Pony Sighting - 1
Veronica Breaks In - 1
Veronica Tases Someone - 0
Who's Your Daddy? - 0
Wallace Does Veronica a Favor - 0
Veronica Wants a Pony - VERONICA HAS A PONY
Logan Punches Someone - 0
Dick's Single Entendres – 0
Shenanigans Called - 0

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